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Clips from Archer - Animation (S02E02)

Short Films 2009 Season 2, Episode 2 7 min 423 clips
Short Sport Documentary

Episodes from this show

Title Season Episode
Mole Hunt 1 1
Training Day 1 2
Diversity Hire 1 3
Killing Utne 1 4
Honeypot 1 5
Skorpio 1 6
Skytanic 1 7
The Rock 1 8
Job Offer 1 9
Dial M for Mother 1 10
Swiss Miss 2 1
Animation 2 2
Animation 2 3
Animation 2 4
Animation 2 5
Animation 2 6
Animation 2 7
Animation 2 8
Animation 2 9
Animation 2 10
Animation 2 11
Animation 2 12
Animation 2 13
Animation 3 1
Animation 3 2
Animation 3 3
Animation 3 4
Animation 3 5
Animation 3 6
Animation 3 7
Animation 3 8
Animation 3 9
Animation 3 10
Animation 3 11
Animation 3 12
Animation 3 13
Fugue and Riffs 4 1
Animation 4 2
Animation 4 3
Animation 4 4
Animation 4 5
Animation 4 6
Animation 4 7
Animation 4 8
Animation 4 9
Animation 4 10
Animation 4 11
Animation 5 1
Animation 5 2
Animation 5 3
Animation 5 4
Animation 5 5
Animation 5 6
Animation 5 7
Animation 5 8
Animation 5 9
Animation 5 10
Title Season Episode
Animation 5 11
Animation 5 12
Animation 5 13
The Holdout 6 1
Three to Tango 6 2
The Archer Sanction 6 3
Edie's Wedding 6 4
Vision Quest 6 5
Sitting 6 6
Animation 6 7
Animation 6 8
Animation 6 9
Animation 6 10
Animation 6 11
Animation 6 12
Animation 6 13
The Figgis Agency 7 1
The Handoff 7 2
Deadly Prep 7 3
Motherless Child 7 4
Bel Panto: Part I 7 5
Bel Panto: Part II 7 6
Double Indecency 7 7
Liquid Lunch 7 8
Deadly Velvet: Part 1 7 9
Deadly Velvet: Part 2 7 10
Animation 8 1
Animation 8 2
Animation 8 3
Animation 8 4
Animation 8 5
Animation 8 6
Animation 8 7
Animation 8 8
Danger Island: Different Modes of Preparing the Fruit 9 3
Danger Island: A Warrior in Costume 9 4
Danger Island: Strange Doings in the Taboo Groves 9 5
Danger Island: Some Remarks on Cannibalism 9 6
Danger Island: Comparative Wickedness of Civilized and Unenlightened Peoples 9 7
Archer: 1999 -- Bort the Garj 10 1
Archer: 1999 -- Happy Borthday 10 2
Archer: 1999 -- The Leftovers 10 3
Archer: 1999 -- Dining with the Zarglorp 10 4
Archer: 1999 -- Mr. Deadly Goes to Town 10 5
Archer: 1999 -- Road Trip 10 6
Archer: 1999 -- Space Pirates 10 7
Archer: 1999 -- Cubert 10 8
Archer: 1999 -- Robert De Niro 10 9
The Orpheus Gambit 11 1
Bloodsploosh 11 2
Helping Hands 11 3
Robot Factory 11 4
Best Friends 11 5
The Double Date 11 6
Caught Napping 11 7
Cold Fusion 11 8
Yes, it sounds amazing, it really does, but we'll talk about it when you get here, hm?
"Yes, it sounds amazing, it really does, but we'll talk about it when you get here, hm?"
Archer
Mind control? Why does he think that?
"Mind control? Why does he think that?"
Archer
- Because he removed it from my brain. - What?
"- Because he removed it from my brain. - What?"
Archer
I told Krieger about my headaches. He gives me a CAT scan, then boom.
"I told Krieger about my headaches. He gives me a CAT scan, then boom."
Archer
Next thing I know, he shoots me full of some kind of fish paralyzer.
"Next thing I know, he shoots me full of some kind of fish paralyzer."
Archer
...by your boyfriend, Nikolai Jakov of the KGB.
"...by your boyfriend, Nikolai Jakov of the KGB."
Archer
My... Get out.
"My... Get out."
Archer
Mother, you've been lying to me my entire life.
"Mother, you've been lying to me my entire life."
Archer
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm right in the middle of a fairly huge deal.
"Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm right in the middle of a fairly huge deal."
Archer
- Buying a lock factory? - For your information, I'm...
"- Buying a lock factory? - For your information, I'm..."
Archer
I'm selling ISIS.
"I'm selling ISIS."
Archer
- You what? - There.
"- You what? - There."
Archer
Everything I had was in a hedge fund.
"Everything I had was in a hedge fund."
Archer
But short answer, yes, she can sell ISIS.
"But short answer, yes, she can sell ISIS."
Archer
- He made me a very attractive offer. - Yeah, I bet.
"- He made me a very attractive offer. - Yeah, I bet."
Archer
MALORY: Hello, Leonard.
"MALORY: Hello, Leonard."
Archer
- Actually, Sterling, if you don't mind? - What?
"- Actually, Sterling, if you don't mind? - What?"
Archer
- Len and I have a lot to talk about. - Like selling ISIS out from under us?
"- Len and I have a lot to talk about. - Like selling ISIS out from under us?"
Archer
- What are you eating? - Ackee and saltfish.
"- What are you eating? - Ackee and saltfish."
Archer
- It's a piece of furniture. - So I'd be, like, the what?
"- It's a piece of furniture. - So I'd be, like, the what?"
Archer
- The...? - Yeah. That's what we're talking about.
"- The...? - Yeah. That's what we're talking about."
Archer
- Lf you are similarly mine... - What?
"- Lf you are similarly mine... - What?"
Archer
- So... - And also mine, yes.
"- So... - And also mine, yes."
Archer
Hey, hey!
"Hey, hey!"
Archer
You idiots wanna hear my plan or not?
"You idiots wanna hear my plan or not?"
Archer
[MALORY WHISTLES AND ALL GROAN]
"[MALORY WHISTLES AND ALL GROAN]"
Archer
Hey, gang, I can't wait to welcome each and every one of you into the ODIN family.
"Hey, gang, I can't wait to welcome each and every one of you into the ODIN family."
Archer
My fam...
"My fam..."
Archer
No. Yes.
"No. Yes."
Archer
Hey, shut up and think of a way to make Trexler not want my mother.
"Hey, shut up and think of a way to make Trexler not want my mother."
Archer
But if we could make Trexler fall out of love...
"But if we could make Trexler fall out of love..."
Archer
You can with a little thing I like to call a deep-cycle marine battery.
"You can with a little thing I like to call a deep-cycle marine battery."
Archer
Or LSD.
"Or LSD."
Archer
- Yes? - Well, that explained a lot.
"- Yes? - Well, that explained a lot."
Archer
I thought they were breath strips.
"I thought they were breath strips."
Archer
KRIEGER: Yeah.
"KRIEGER: Yeah."
Archer
Or LSD.
"Or LSD."
Archer
[DRILL WHIRRING]
"[DRILL WHIRRING]"
Archer
Where is the trust?
"Where is the trust?"
Archer
Ugh. I don't think I even wanna know.
"Ugh. I don't think I even wanna know."
Archer
[LINE RINGS]
"[LINE RINGS]"
Archer
Well, I didn't know that, ass.
"Well, I didn't know that, ass."
Archer
- So you could wait for the batteries to die. - Okay, yeah, that's...
"- So you could wait for the batteries to die. - Okay, yeah, that's..."
Archer
Shut up, it's more of a...
"Shut up, it's more of a..."
Archer
- Still pretty hot. - Will you shut up?
"- Still pretty hot. - Will you shut up?"
Archer
All right, I'm going in. Man, I can't believe I'm doing this.
"All right, I'm going in. Man, I can't believe I'm doing this."
Archer
Lana, we're in crisis mode. Mother's trying to sell us to ODIN.
"Lana, we're in crisis mode. Mother's trying to sell us to ODIN."
Archer
- Speaking of mess, your birdbot is leaking. - My what?
"- Speaking of mess, your birdbot is leaking. - My what?"
Archer
- So don't try to do anything stupid. - I don't have to try.
"- So don't try to do anything stupid. - I don't have to try."
Archer
Shit. Whatever, move.
"Shit. Whatever, move."
Archer
Oh, maybe.
"Oh, maybe."
Archer
Yeah, doesn't that feel good?
"Yeah, doesn't that feel good?"
Archer
- You're already loaded. - What if I weren't?
"- You're already loaded. - What if I weren't?"
Archer
- You really do, don't you? - And always have.
"- You really do, don't you? - And always have."
Archer
Huh. What about those years you spent...
"Huh. What about those years you spent..."
Archer
- Anastasia. - No, the tall brunette, "crazy" crazy.
"- Anastasia. - No, the tall brunette, "crazy" crazy."
Archer
Get it all down in your nooks and crannies. Someone's gotten pretty oily...
"Get it all down in your nooks and crannies. Someone's gotten pretty oily..."
Archer
- I already jotted a bunch down and... - Hey, hey, that's great.
"- I already jotted a bunch down and... - Hey, hey, that's great."
Archer
- A perquisite for the job, yeah. - Right.
"- A perquisite for the job, yeah. - Right."
Archer
- Either way, Barry's pretty stoked. - Ick.
"- Either way, Barry's pretty stoked. - Ick."
Archer
So people can nonverbally indicate where stuff happened on their body.
"So people can nonverbally indicate where stuff happened on their body."
Archer
ARCHER: Yeah, that takes, like, one doll. - Not if there's ever a gang rape.
"ARCHER: Yeah, that takes, like, one doll. - Not if there's ever a gang rape."
Archer
Cyril, pill up, you're assisting Krieger with the surgery.
"Cyril, pill up, you're assisting Krieger with the surgery."
Archer
Ray, you lure Lana into the mainframe. And Carol, you lure Barry...
"Ray, you lure Lana into the mainframe. And Carol, you lure Barry..."
Archer
- How do you know? Hm? - How...?
"- How do you know? Hm? - How...?"
Archer
For two years, yeah. I mean, she was a lesbian, but still...
"For two years, yeah. I mean, she was a lesbian, but still..."
Archer
We met in a "Pray Away the Gay" bible group. That was a pretty weird time for me.
"We met in a "Pray Away the Gay" bible group. That was a pretty weird time for me."
Archer
But don't touch them. Lysergic acid is absorbed through the skin.
"But don't touch them. Lysergic acid is absorbed through the skin."
Archer
- Oh, right, like you're one to talk. - Yeah, Pillbo Baggins.
"- Oh, right, like you're one to talk. - Yeah, Pillbo Baggins."
Archer
- These are from a doctor. - So? Krieger's a doctor.
"- These are from a doctor. - So? Krieger's a doctor."
Archer
Infamously few of words, I guess.
"Infamously few of words, I guess."
Archer
- Pretty succinct. - Guess you guys have lots in common.
"- Pretty succinct. - Guess you guys have lots in common."
Archer
Look alive, gang. I think Archer's gonna try to torpedo this deal...
"Look alive, gang. I think Archer's gonna try to torpedo this deal..."
Archer
I'll tell you what's shitty. Somebody's breath around here.
"I'll tell you what's shitty. Somebody's breath around here."
Archer
[SNIFFING]
"[SNIFFING]"
Archer
Well, what do you think?
"Well, what do you think?"
Archer
But are you sure you'll get the job?
"But are you sure you'll get the job?"
Archer
Right, he said he's in the mainframe and it's now or never.
"Right, he said he's in the mainframe and it's now or never."
Archer
...in asking for your hand in marriage.
"...in asking for your hand in marriage."
Archer
No, it's beautiful, it's...
"No, it's beautiful, it's..."
Archer
Well, maybe not traditional, but it's a damn classy move.
"Well, maybe not traditional, but it's a damn classy move."
Archer
- Barry? BARRY: In here.
"- Barry? BARRY: In here."
Archer
Just doing some deep knee bends.
"Just doing some deep knee bends."
Archer
- Then why did you send that note? - What note?
"- Then why did you send that note? - What note?"
Archer
- Yeah. - Morris chairs, that kind of stuff.
"- Yeah. - Morris chairs, that kind of stuff."
Archer
Well, maybe you're in love. She's just in need.
"Well, maybe you're in love. She's just in need."
Archer
- So, what you're saying, she's... - Using you, you dumb idiot.
"- So, what you're saying, she's... - Using you, you dumb idiot."
Archer
Look, this sale's gonna happen.
"Look, this sale's gonna happen."
Archer
MALORY: Oh, for the...
"MALORY: Oh, for the..."
Archer
Wow, so that didn't take long, huh?
"Wow, so that didn't take long, huh?"
Archer
What are you doing? What's next?
"What are you doing? What's next?"
Archer
Okay, now... Wow, that feels good.
"Okay, now... Wow, that feels good."
Archer
ARCHER: Krieger. - Oh, commence the modified Ludovico.
"ARCHER: Krieger. - Oh, commence the modified Ludovico."
Archer
Commencing the modified Ludovico.
"Commencing the modified Ludovico."
Archer
Aah! Aah! No, no, no.
"Aah! Aah! No, no, no."
Archer
...horrible woman? - That's Malory Archer.
"...horrible woman? - That's Malory Archer."
Archer
Krieger? Krieger?
"Krieger? Krieger?"
Archer
- Commence satellite link. CYRIL: Commencing satellite link.
"- Commence satellite link. CYRIL: Commencing satellite link."
Archer
Okay, it's over and you're sure you don't wanna marry that woman?
"Okay, it's over and you're sure you don't wanna marry that woman?"
Archer
- Tell me. - Some of that lettuce.
"- Tell me. - Some of that lettuce."
Archer
- Um, okay. - Or actually, can I have all of it?
"- Um, okay. - Or actually, can I have all of it?"
Archer
And the bunny attached to it. He is attached, right?
"And the bunny attached to it. He is attached, right?"
Archer
- It's cold in here. TREXLER: Because she's here.
"- It's cold in here. TREXLER: Because she's here."
Archer
- Len, what's going on? TREXLER: You're mean.
"- Len, what's going on? TREXLER: You're mean."
Archer
- Rabbert Klein. - Rabbert Klein.
"- Rabbert Klein. - Rabbert Klein."
Archer
- So Barry, you ass. BARRY: Yeah?
"- So Barry, you ass. BARRY: Yeah?"
Archer
And a broken hand which kills.
"And a broken hand which kills."
Archer
- I didn't do anyth... - Yes, you did.
"- I didn't do anyth... - Yes, you did."
Archer
- To who? MAN: Or whom.
"- To who? MAN: Or whom."
Archer
- What? Popeye? POPEYE: Mm-hm.
"- What? Popeye? POPEYE: Mm-hm."
Archer
And he paid up front, in cash.
"And he paid up front, in cash."
Archer
And I also know I got five of your hand-tailored suits in the back.
"And I also know I got five of your hand-tailored suits in the back."
Archer
Now, get the **** out of my cleaners.
"Now, get the **** out of my cleaners."
Archer
- Not anymore. - What in the...?
"- Not anymore. - What in the...?"
Archer
Well, Krieger thinks it's some satellite-linked mind-control device.
"Well, Krieger thinks it's some satellite-linked mind-control device."
Archer
- Then it was drill, baby, drill. - Oh, my God.
"- Then it was drill, baby, drill. - Oh, my God."
Archer
- Yeah. - How do you feel?
"- Yeah. - How do you feel?"
Archer
It was obviously put in my brain in the first place...
"It was obviously put in my brain in the first place..."
Archer
Sterling, first of all, we're not even together anymore.
"Sterling, first of all, we're not even together anymore."
Archer
- Uh-huh. Yeah, I bet. - And second of all...
"- Uh-huh. Yeah, I bet. - And second of all..."
Archer