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Clips from Archer - Animation (S05E05)

Short Films 2009 Season 5, Episode 7 7 min 385 clips

Episodes from this show

- Yam! Yom! Yom! - Stop. Stop it.
My baby's not gonna be a coke addict!
Well, sure, now. Wait until you're waist-deep in
Ugh! Then fast-forward to him
Well? How hard is it to sell 2,000
1,900 and... What?! Pam! You damn coke fiend!
- Ow! - Enough! But, Pam,
I swear to God, if I find out you're lying to me...
Let me do it! Come on! Just for a minute!
- No! - Goddamn it!
- What could go wrong?! - Uh, you could
waltzing into Colombia with 100 pounds of cocaine.
Maybe someday you'll meet a mummy.
I also know what I'm doing!
What?!
Ow!
Use the... the surveillance satellite.
- She hates it. - ISIS had satellites.
I'm sorry, was there
ragtag bunch of Mujahideen heroes in Afghanistan!
And ISIS did do a lot of bad stuff.
He said, sucking at being a lawyer.
I'm actually an excellent lawyer.
Maybe at ISIS. But on ISIS missions, you had
- Ay, mierda. - Oh, goddamn Latin.
Colombia? What are they doing in Colombia?
Snacklesnaaamps...! ♪ But why take cocaine
Yes, for a very lucrative business proposition.
make a phone call, and someone will come.
Until then, just keep drinking your guaro, huh?
of you.
Hmm, see what I did there?
I gained his trust.
Damn it, Archer, I told you.
- of I have snake poisoning. - Moveri!
It's the army.
But what do they...
- Hey, what are you doing? - Waiting for you.
¡Abre la puerta!
and order because the cops can't or won't...
- us out. - Yeah, and after you
So, hey.
- Yes! - Then come on!
Hammer down!
- overheating. - Well, then stop, you
- idiot. - I am not the idiot who
Cyril, may I see the distributor cap?
Are we seriously done with "phrasing"?
- ¿Qué? - Archer!
- Archer? - ¿Quien es más macho?
Well, then who the hell is it?
a tiger. And C-- "guapo" means
It's your mother.
- Put Sterling on the... - Hey, damn it, Archer!
- it... Ray, give it. - I'm serious.
Damn it, give it here.
a little compressed, but whatever.
somebody named The Godmother looking like you.
But first, business, then
No.
So, shall we have sex?
Please, no más. Oh, my God.
- feel my legs. - Are you sure you
- Ow! - Which is why you don't
- some churros! - Malditos gringos.
Eres guapo. A La Culebra!
So, I get that you're
Yum-yum-yum! Yum-yum-yum! Gimme! Gimme!
Yum-yum! Gimme! - Goddamn it, will you
- calm the shit down?! - Wow.
Well?! This isn't good practice.
Is it too late to not have it?
Yes! For the jillionth time, I want this baby, so...
in the house.
then singlehandedly bankrupting your drug cartel!
- Wait-- college? - Yeah, right?
- My point is... - All babies should
- be drowned? - Not all babies.
- Just baby people. - Don't you have a...
- tractor pull to headline? - Yes.
- No! - Aw...
No more of that bush-league nonsense.
Archer's just been trying too hard.
lately you've been putting so much pressure on him.
- Malory, stop! - I mean, did you used
- I don't know. Did you? - Have you been
- stealing coke? - Wha...? No!
playing choo-choo-spoon with a tranny?
It said, baffling medical science.
- I'm not! About this! - Well, then where the
- hell did it go?! - Oh, you were serious?
- Gimme! - Archer, move your...
- Ray! - Stop it!
crash it! Just like you crashed
- the damn space shuttle! - Oh, my
God, right? Remember that?
Ray, you remember? You got paralyzed?
Oh, my God, Cyril, for the... We're not just
- I... - Is there a name
I meant once we get there!
Your plan is to just ask around for...?
La Madrina, yes, the Godmother.
But what do you think is gonna happen when three
Yeah, showing mommy who's a big boy.
Oh, you want to see who's a big boy?