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Clips from ALF - The Gambler (S01E01)

Video Games 1986 Season 1, Episode 23 ★ 4.6/10 (21 ratings) 411 clips
Sci-Fi

Episodes from this show

No, it's accurate.
"No, it's accurate."
ALF
No! No!
"No! No!"
ALF
Because we're going to need someplace...
"Because we're going to need someplace..."
ALF
And you know what a garage sale is? Yeah.
"And you know what a garage sale is? Yeah."
ALF
And scooter.
"And scooter."
ALF
Hi, kids.
"Hi, kids."
ALF
[ Horse race announcer ]
"[ Horse race announcer ]"
ALF
That's funny, i can't picture you at a race track.
"That's funny, i can't picture you at a race track."
ALF
You meet an unsavory element there.
"You meet an unsavory element there."
ALF
You bet with a fish?
"You bet with a fish?"
ALF
Where did you get 50 bucks?
"Where did you get 50 bucks?"
ALF
Where did you get the 50 bucks?
"Where did you get the 50 bucks?"
ALF
And i'm not going to place any bets for you.
"And i'm not going to place any bets for you."
ALF
Not bad, huh? 50 bucks at 6:1 odds,
"Not bad, huh? 50 bucks at 6:1 odds,"
ALF
Yeah, a deuce on the quinela,
"Yeah, a deuce on the quinela,"
ALF
And a half on the perfecta.
"And a half on the perfecta."
ALF
Kate, i think your neighbors,
"Kate, i think your neighbors,"
ALF
Yeah. They got a couple of beat-Up chairs...
"Yeah. They got a couple of beat-Up chairs..."
ALF
And an old sofa out on their front lawn.
"And an old sofa out on their front lawn."
ALF
Mom, how come dad's hockey stick is not out there?
"Mom, how come dad's hockey stick is not out there?"
ALF
Not a race, this is the race.
"Not a race, this is the race."
ALF
The one that just fell down?
"The one that just fell down?"
ALF
Thank you, alf.
"Thank you, alf."
ALF
Nick! Alf. Does that race count?
"Nick! Alf. Does that race count?"
ALF
Well, i'm glad we had this talk.
"Well, i'm glad we had this talk."
ALF
It's just an observation.
"It's just an observation."
ALF
I'll see if we have anything in the refrigerator.
"I'll see if we have anything in the refrigerator."
ALF
Down here!
"Down here!"
ALF
Shaking.
"Shaking."
ALF
That bookie.
"That bookie."
ALF
Hi. Kate, this is mr. Mintz.
"Hi. Kate, this is mr. Mintz."
ALF
No, no.
"No, no."
ALF
Been taking everything. Nothing works.
"Been taking everything. Nothing works."
ALF
Come on, alf, just give me the 6 grand,
"Come on, alf, just give me the 6 grand,"
ALF
So i can go home and use the vaporizer.
"So i can go home and use the vaporizer."
ALF
Mr. Mintz, i'm afraid i don't have $6,000.
"Mr. Mintz, i'm afraid i don't have $6,000."
ALF
I should take better care of myself.
"I should take better care of myself."
ALF
To keep you people out of the poorhouse.
"To keep you people out of the poorhouse."
ALF
It's perfect for the film we're doing.
"It's perfect for the film we're doing."
ALF
Why not? It has sentimental value.
"Why not? It has sentimental value."
ALF
How about $6,000?
"How about $6,000?"
ALF
Right!
"Right!"
ALF
You're not selling my ship in a bottle?
"You're not selling my ship in a bottle?"
ALF
If we're lucky.
"If we're lucky."
ALF
But i love that ship. It's the "ni?."
"But i love that ship. It's the "ni?.""
ALF
Willie, the reason we're having a garage sale...
"Willie, the reason we're having a garage sale..."
ALF
Is to get rid of things.
"Is to get rid of things."
ALF
We don't have to be fanatics about it.
"We don't have to be fanatics about it."
ALF
Listen, i've been going over the bills.
"Listen, i've been going over the bills."
ALF
Someone should take your credit cards away.
"Someone should take your credit cards away."
ALF
Give me those.
"Give me those."
ALF
Is that a typo?
"Is that a typo?"
ALF
An $11,000 balloon payment?
"An $11,000 balloon payment?"
ALF
You guys are getting ripped off.
"You guys are getting ripped off."
ALF
You can get a whole package of balloons for 69 cents.
"You can get a whole package of balloons for 69 cents."
ALF
No, alf. 7 years ago,
"No, alf. 7 years ago,"
ALF
We took out a mortgage on the house.
"We took out a mortgage on the house."
ALF
Just to buy a balloon?
"Just to buy a balloon?"
ALF
Let's not talk about this now.
"Let's not talk about this now."
ALF
We've only got a week to get ready for the garage sale.
"We've only got a week to get ready for the garage sale."
ALF
You're selling the garage?
"You're selling the garage?"
ALF
That's good,
"That's good,"
ALF
To store that balloon.
"To store that balloon."
ALF
♪♪
"♪♪"
ALF
So you understand what a balloon payment is? Yeah.
"So you understand what a balloon payment is? Yeah."
ALF
Good!
"Good!"
ALF
Now can you explain "secular humanism" again?
"Now can you explain "secular humanism" again?"
ALF
No.
"No."
ALF
Hey, you're not selling that, are you?
"Hey, you're not selling that, are you?"
ALF
I'm afraid so.
"I'm afraid so."
ALF
Too bad. It'd be a great bottle...
"Too bad. It'd be a great bottle..."
ALF
If it weren't for the ship stuck in it.
"If it weren't for the ship stuck in it."
ALF
It's a "ni?."
"It's a "ni?.""
ALF
It doesn't matter.
"It doesn't matter."
ALF
We're selling it anyway.
"We're selling it anyway."
ALF
This house payment's hanging over your head, isn't it?
"This house payment's hanging over your head, isn't it?"
ALF
No, we're just trying to clear away a little extra space.
"No, we're just trying to clear away a little extra space."
ALF
Level with me.
"Level with me."
ALF
You're on the skids, aren't you?
"You're on the skids, aren't you?"
ALF
No.
"No."
ALF
Dad, mom wants me to sell muffy-Bear.
"Dad, mom wants me to sell muffy-Bear."
ALF
No!!
"No!!"
ALF
We've got to be strong about this.
"We've got to be strong about this."
ALF
Not my hockey stick! No!
"Not my hockey stick! No!"
ALF
Knock, knock.
"Knock, knock."
ALF
Who's there?
"Who's there?"
ALF
Hi kids who?
"Hi kids who?"
ALF
Hi, grandma.
"Hi, grandma."
ALF
Stop it. You're ruining the joke.
"Stop it. You're ruining the joke."
ALF
Excuse me, kids.
"Excuse me, kids."
ALF
I love you very much,
"I love you very much,"
ALF
But there's something i gotta watch on tv.
"But there's something i gotta watch on tv."
ALF
What? A horse race.
"What? A horse race."
ALF
Hi, mom.
"Hi, mom."
ALF
Shh!
"Shh!"
ALF
Come on, "smooth as butter"!
"Come on, "smooth as butter"!"
ALF
Mom, do you have money on that horse?
"Mom, do you have money on that horse?"
ALF
"And it's 'smooth as butter' by 3 lengths."
""And it's 'smooth as butter' by 3 lengths.""
ALF
Woo! Woo!
"Woo! Woo!"
ALF
Mom, since when do you bet on horses?
"Mom, since when do you bet on horses?"
ALF
All my life.
"All my life."
ALF
I could picture her running. Ha! Ha!
"I could picture her running. Ha! Ha!"
ALF
I wonder how long it would take...
"I wonder how long it would take..."
ALF
To pull the hair out of your body?
"To pull the hair out of your body?"
ALF
About 2 hours.
"About 2 hours."
ALF
Mom, how come you never took me to a race track?
"Mom, how come you never took me to a race track?"
ALF
I never go to a race track.
"I never go to a race track."
ALF
I bet with a bookie.
"I bet with a bookie."
ALF
Ah! They're not unsavory.
"Ah! They're not unsavory."
ALF
Forgive my ignorance, but what's a "bookie"?
"Forgive my ignorance, but what's a "bookie"?"
ALF
An unsavory element.
"An unsavory element."
ALF
"Nick the fish" is not unsavory.
""Nick the fish" is not unsavory."
ALF
"Nick the fish?"
""Nick the fish?""
ALF
Hi, dorothy.
"Hi, dorothy."
ALF
Hi, willie.
"Hi, willie."
ALF
Did you know my mother bets on horses?
"Did you know my mother bets on horses?"
ALF
Yeah.
"Yeah."
ALF
How much did you win, grandma?
"How much did you win, grandma?"
ALF
300 bucks!
"300 bucks!"
ALF
That's even better than last week.
"That's even better than last week."
ALF