Clips from Blackadder (1982) - The Queen of Spain's Beard (S01E01)

Shows Season 1, Episode 4 513 clips

Episodes from this show

Title	Season	Episode
The Foretelling	1	1
Born to Be King	1	2
The Archbishop	1	3

Title	Season	Episode
The Queen of Spain's Beard	1	4
Witchsmeller Pursuivant	1	5
The Black Seal	1	6

"— ..with the King gone... — Hmm?"

Blackadder (1982)

"or you'll be slaughtered! Onward!"

Blackadder (1982)

"No, not away from the castle, towards it!"

Blackadder (1982)

"Splendid! Splendid! (Bleating)"

Blackadder (1982)

"He writes here that he'll be back by St Leonard's Day."

Blackadder (1982)

"I shall handle the visiting royalty, of course,"

Blackadder (1982)

"Er...yes...yes. Fine, fine, I'd be honoured!"

Blackadder (1982)

"Thank you so very much."

Blackadder (1982)

"then you would be regent now."

Blackadder (1982)

"Yes, I would be king."

Blackadder (1982)

"Precisely!"

Blackadder (1982)

"It's not fair, you know."

Blackadder (1982)

"She's so pure, she daren't look down,"

Blackadder (1982)

"and make mad, passionate love to you."

Blackadder (1982)

"Oh, yes! The feast!"

Blackadder (1982)

"No, I was thinking of something else."

Blackadder (1982)

"Yes. I like the eunuchs."

Blackadder (1982)

"I wish I owned one."

Blackadder (1982)

"Oh, God."

Blackadder (1982)

"We've only one act, and she's shaved her beard off."

Blackadder (1982)

"Oh, yes — and the amazing beardless woman. What a line—up!"

Blackadder (1982)

"They come in, My Lord, and they jump."

Blackadder (1982)

""Sir Dominic Prick and his Magnificent Strolling Wooferoonies"

Blackadder (1982)

""perform the tragic masterpiece The Death Of The Pharaoh.”"

Blackadder (1982)

"It had better be funny, or Prick gets his comeuppance!"

Blackadder (1982)

"Jerry Merryweather and his four chickens?"

Blackadder (1982)

"Yes, My Lord."

Blackadder (1982)

"We'll have them. (Knock at door)"

Blackadder (1982)

"What is it, My Lord?"

Blackadder (1982)

"— My Lord... — Take that to the Lord Chancellor."

Blackadder (1982)

"We could have the morris dancers, My Lord."

Blackadder (1982)

"So...do you want them, or not?"

Blackadder (1982)

"Ah, Edmund."

Blackadder (1982)

"What? Greek?"

Blackadder (1982)

"Oh, no, no, no, no, no!"

Blackadder (1982)

"Because...correct me if 1'm wrong, Lord Percy —"

Blackadder (1982)

"St Leonard himself was an eunuch."

Blackadder (1982)

"To leave out the eunuchs on St Leonard's Day would be like..."

Blackadder (1982)

"Besides, Lord Dougal McAngus, the supreme commander, is expected"

Blackadder (1982)

"Well, I'm relying on you, Edmund. Carry on!"

Blackadder (1982)

"So! Some carrot—faced, thistle—arsed"

Blackadder (1982)

"— He's a great warrior. — That's what they all say."

Blackadder (1982)

"Then it probably is."

Blackadder (1982)

"It's not a brain—teaser, Percy."

Blackadder (1982)

"I mean, I cannot understand a word they're saying."

Blackadder (1982)

"Percy...have you ever wondered what your insides look like?"

Blackadder (1982)

"I'd be willing to satisfy your curiosity. Is that clear? Is it?"

Blackadder (1982)

"I'm the Duke of Edinburgh!"

Blackadder (1982)

"I can make things difficult for him."

Blackadder (1982)

"As for these entertainments..."

Blackadder (1982)

"Percy, you'd better go get Bernard the bear—baiter."

Blackadder (1982)

"— Yes. — Looks like we'll need him."

Blackadder (1982)

"— Percy. — Yes, My Lord?"

Blackadder (1982)

"— Dougal McAngus! — Oh, but of course!"

Blackadder (1982)

"McAngus greets you and lays at your feet the spoils of war."

Blackadder (1982)

"Oh, sorry, that's my overnight bag."

Blackadder (1982)

"Oh, McAngus! It fills me with joy and hope to see you."

Blackadder (1982)

"Join us. You must be starving."

Blackadder (1982)

"— And young Lochinvar? — And him, too."

Blackadder (1982)

"Come on, Lochinvar!"

Blackadder (1982)

"You must be the King's wee rumpy—pumpy."

Blackadder (1982)

"— My father sends his regards. — Do I know him?"

Blackadder (1982)

"I think you could say that."

Blackadder (1982)

"He's Donald McAngus, third Duke of Argyll"

Blackadder (1982)

"Ah, the eunuch!"

Blackadder (1982)

"— You sound like one. — I am not a eunuch."

Blackadder (1982)

"I'm sorry — you're in my chair."

Blackadder (1982)

"Grant me fair Selkirk and the shire of Roxburgh."

Blackadder (1982)

"but those lands do, in fact, belong to me."

Blackadder (1982)

"Yes?"

Blackadder (1982)

""What an absurd idea,"

Blackadder (1982)

""for slaughtering syphilitic Turks.”"

Blackadder (1982)

"Good, good. So be it."

Blackadder (1982)

"Where?"

Blackadder (1982)

"In the Great Hall and in the bladder."

Blackadder (1982)

"Yes."

Blackadder (1982)

"Yes, perhaps we need something..."

Blackadder (1982)

"— I have a cunning plan. — I have a more cunning one."

Blackadder (1982)

"— Mine's pretty cunning. — Not cunning enough."

Blackadder (1982)

"— Depends on how cunning you mean. — Damn cunning!"

Blackadder (1982)

"a wonderful idea..."

Blackadder (1982)

"No, I think I have a plan which will give us a little more..."

Blackadder (1982)

"Nnngaaargh!"

Blackadder (1982)

"Can I help ye?"

Blackadder (1982)

"I wondered if you could do me a little favour."

Blackadder (1982)

"(Laughs sheepishly, then screams)"

Blackadder (1982)

"Um... Well..."

Blackadder (1982)

"Thing is, we were hoping to present a mystery play"

Blackadder (1982)

"by one of our leading thespianic troupes"

Blackadder (1982)

"but, unfortunately, one of their number is ill, um..."

Blackadder (1982)

"Well, I warn ye..."

Blackadder (1982)

"There shouldn't be much acting required."

Blackadder (1982)

"I'll have a crack at it. (Animal yelps)"

Blackadder (1982)

"Yes, well, as I say..."

Blackadder (1982)

"Woooorgh!"

Blackadder (1982)

"Tall trees! Let's see those branches waving."

Blackadder (1982)

"— # Mimimi. # — How did it go?"

Blackadder (1982)

"Not bad,"

Blackadder (1982)

"To spill the blood of this Scotsman vile."

Blackadder (1982)

"Don't be absurd. Such activities are totally beyond my mother."

Blackadder (1982)

"What?"

Blackadder (1982)

"(McAngus) Aye, it is."

Blackadder (1982)

"Quickly! McAngus is going to die!"

Blackadder (1982)

"— Any moment! — Carrot—faced orang—utan!"

Blackadder (1982)

"He knows too much!"

Blackadder (1982)

"No, he mustn't, he mustn't! He has vital information."

Blackadder (1982)

"— When were these written? — 1460."

Blackadder (1982)

"(He laughs fiendishly) Baldrick! Get in here."

Blackadder (1982)

"Tell them I have a very important announcement to make."

Blackadder (1982)

"(He laughs fiendishly)"

Blackadder (1982)

"— Do I have to take the dress off? — Get out!"

Blackadder (1982)

"If you played your cards right, you could become king."

Blackadder (1982)

"Look, Edmund, is this announcement going to take long?"

Blackadder (1982)

"certain letters, certain rather extraordinary letters"

Blackadder (1982)

"Letters?"

Blackadder (1982)

"Your father being, of course, Donald, third Duke of Argyll"

Blackadder (1982)

""often, as you sit at table with my husband,"

Blackadder (1982)

""Big—boy!" Mother! Do you know about this?"

Blackadder (1982)

"What chance did I have? I was a little foreign girl."

Blackadder (1982)

"Then I must renounce the regency and hie me to a monastery."

Blackadder (1982)