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Clips from Silicon Valley - Daily Active Users (S03E03)

"is a really slow, super expensive shitty bus."
Silicon Valley
"No... we built an airplane, we got to fly it."
Silicon Valley
"What's the point of flying if it's fucking empty?"
Silicon Valley
"I think people will want to fly"
Silicon Valley
"once they realize how cool the platform is."
Silicon Valley
"Guys, I know we're in a tough spot right now,"
Silicon Valley
"and I know we needed a quarter million DAU's"
Silicon Valley
"in order to get our next round of funding, but this is it."
Silicon Valley
"I think we can do this. All we got to do"
Silicon Valley
"is just take every last dollar that we have,"
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"which is... Sorry... Jared, what?"
Silicon Valley
"Well, after the Table ads,"
Silicon Valley
"the salaries, recruiter fees..."
Silicon Valley
"You know what? I haven't run the numbers."
Silicon Valley
"It would be irresponsible to estimate."
Silicon Valley
"Okay... is it less than a million dollars?"
Silicon Valley
"- Oh, God, yeah. - Okay."
Silicon Valley
"- It's higher than 500,000, right? - Yeah."
Silicon Valley
"I guess it's about $697,240. But don't quote me on that."
Silicon Valley
"Okay, we use that money to do outreach, tutorials,"
Silicon Valley
"user meetups... create a guerrilla marketing campaign"
Silicon Valley
"that explains how cool the platform is."
Silicon Valley
"I know it's not ideal, but, um, I really think we can pull this off."
Silicon Valley
"Yeah, that seems doable."
Silicon Valley
"Lie."
Silicon Valley
"Or here's another idea: We could put the platform on hold,"
Silicon Valley
"take the money we have left and pivot to something"
Silicon Valley
"that doesn't require hours of explanation."
Silicon Valley
"You know, I've been showing people the video-chat app"
Silicon Valley
"- that I hacked together and... - Shut up, Dinesh!"
Silicon Valley
"You ungrateful pricks, all of you."
Silicon Valley
"Your tepid response to our intrepid boss makes me ill."
Silicon Valley
"His plan, will it work?"
Silicon Valley
"Almost certainly not."
Silicon Valley
"All of you will likely look back at this time in your lives"
Silicon Valley
"and realize you wasted a whole year with nothing to show for it."
Silicon Valley
"But if this company is a plane, then this is Richard's goddamn plane,"
Silicon Valley
"and if he wants to fly it in the side of a fucking mountain,"
Silicon Valley
"that is his prerogative and it is our duty to climb on,"
Silicon Valley
"strap in and have a fiery death right behind him."
Silicon Valley
"I don't... I don't know about that, but..."
Silicon Valley
"Richard, the floor."
Silicon Valley
"Crashing aside, I think this is the plan and..."
Silicon Valley
"really, what other option do we have?"
Silicon Valley
"Well, I know what option I have."
Silicon Valley
"I can quit. So I quit."
Silicon Valley
"Okay. Any... anybody else?"
Silicon Valley
"Guys, no."
Silicon Valley
"Look, Douglas,"
Silicon Valley
"customer support is going to be a big part of this."
Silicon Valley
"We need you guys if we're going to get 250,000 users."
Silicon Valley
"I barely have any customers to support, Richard."
Silicon Valley
"And the only way you're going to get that many users"
Silicon Valley
"is if you go to one of those click farms in Bangladesh"
Silicon Valley
"and pay for them. Good fuckin' luck, man. I'm out."
Silicon Valley
"- Guys, wait. - Jared, let them go."
Silicon Valley
"I have to do their exit interviews."
Silicon Valley
"I guess I can do them on their walk to their cars."
Silicon Valley
"Richard, we're better off without them."
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"Lie."
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"This is intolerable. A man can only take so much."
Silicon Valley
"Banished from my own company? No."
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"I'm just going to give them what they want. I'm going to resign."
Silicon Valley
"We can go to Haiti, build orphanages."
Silicon Valley
"Haiti?"
Silicon Valley
"Is it not said that one should think globally and act locally?"
Silicon Valley
"I'm not acting at all."
Silicon Valley
"Lao Tzu teaches the best fighter is never angry."
Silicon Valley
"More important than the blow is knowing when to strike."
Silicon Valley
"Like, perhaps, after we experience"
Silicon Valley
"the executive white water rafting trip in Coeur D'Alene?"
Silicon Valley
"Gavin, do you have a moment?"
Silicon Valley
"Yes."
Silicon Valley
"Alone?"
Silicon Valley
"Of course. Denpok?"
Silicon Valley
"What?"
Silicon Valley
"Give us a moment, please?"
Silicon Valley
"'T'U'S'U'B'T'I'T'U'L'O'C'O'M'"
Silicon Valley
"Gavin, I'm really not supposed to be talking to you,"
Silicon Valley
"but there's something I think you should know about."
Silicon Valley
"- I'm listening. - A customer service rep that just left Pied Piper"
Silicon Valley
"is on campus right now interviewing for a job."
Silicon Valley
"Why would anyone leave Pied Piper now?"
Silicon Valley
"I thought maybe you'd want to ask him yourself."
Silicon Valley
"Well done. Well done."
Silicon Valley
"Okay. Thank you for coming in, Douglas."
Silicon Valley
"- Yeah. - Right this way. - Okay."
Silicon Valley
"Douglas."
Silicon Valley
"Consider the possum. Nature's..."
Silicon Valley
"Gavin, if you're bringing another animal into this board room,"
Silicon Valley
"- this meeting is over. - Of course not. Don't insult me."
Silicon Valley
"Gentlemen and lady of the Hooli board,"
Silicon Valley
"I am the possum to which I refer."
Silicon Valley
"Playing dead to outwit those who wish me harm."
Silicon Valley
"But it's time to end the charade."
Silicon Valley
"I'm sorry, Gavin. What charade?"
Silicon Valley
"For months, I've led the world to believe"
Silicon Valley
"that my Endframe division was pursuing"
Silicon Valley
"a broad-based compression platform"
Silicon Valley
"in direct competition with Pied Piper."
Silicon Valley
"But secretly, I knew that any such platform was destined to fail."
Silicon Valley
"But Pied Piper is not failing."
Silicon Valley
"It's the most popular app in the Hooli store."
Silicon Valley
"One of the most installed, yes."
Silicon Valley
"But I happen to know, because I make it my business to know,"
Silicon Valley
"that their daily active user numbers are abysmal."
Silicon Valley
"So, you were never developing a platform."
Silicon Valley
"Why didn't you tell us this?"
Silicon Valley
"Says the chairperson of the board"
Silicon Valley
"that recently asked for my resignation."
Silicon Valley
"Trust cuts both ways. I thought it best to leave you out of it."
Silicon Valley
"I'm sorry, Gavin. I'm just finding all of this impossible to believe."
Silicon Valley
"If you were never building a platform, what did we just spend"
Silicon Valley
"three-quarters of a billion dollars on?"
Silicon Valley
"I'm not going to tell you."
Silicon Valley
"Instead, I'm going to let the new head of product"
Silicon Valley
"for Hooli/Endframe tell you."
Silicon Valley
"Hello, everyone."
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"I'm Jack Barker, and I'm very excited"
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"to introduce Hooli/Endframe's newest product..."
Silicon Valley
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