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Clips from Man Seeking Woman - Pitbull (S01E01)

"(Phone buzzing) Who is texting you so late?"
Man Seeking Woman
"Oh, Mike. Wow. Let's see."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Huh. - Ew."
Man Seeking Woman
"Yeah, ew."
Man Seeking Woman
"You don't need that guy to help you get a girlfriend. You know that, right?"
Man Seeking Woman
"Mm."
Man Seeking Woman
"Like, you're gonna find someone super wonderful,"
Man Seeking Woman
"Thank you. Thank you, Liz. I appreciate that."
Man Seeking Woman
"You know, and in the meantime, you can just... focus on you."
Man Seeking Woman
"self-love."
Man Seeking Woman
"Just maybe taking a yoga class."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Eh... - Or just go over to the gym."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Yeah, I guess I could. - Meditate."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Meditate five minutes a day. - Just... yeah, okay."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Yup. - These are just tiny little seeds"
Man Seeking Woman
"(phone buzzing) that we're planting here, and it's"
Man Seeking Woman
"Maybe not gonna take a week. A couple months."
Man Seeking Woman
"(Phone buzzing) Little tiny plant growing."
Man Seeking Woman
"Beautiful woman's gonna walk by."
Man Seeking Woman
"She's gonna be like..."
Man Seeking Woman
"I want that."
Man Seeking Woman
"I want this..."
Man Seeking Woman
"in my face."
Man Seeking Woman
"(buzzing) Damn. So glad I watered myself."
Man Seeking Woman
"- cardiovascular system and... - Yeah."
Man Seeking Woman
"Do you want to?"
Man Seeking Woman
"- Yeah. Yup, yup. Yeah. - Yeah? Is 7:00 a.m."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Too early? - No, 7:00 a.m.'s not early enough."
Man Seeking Woman
"But, uh, in that case, I should hit the sack..."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Right, no, that's perfect... 7:00 a.m. - See you tomorrow morning."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Oh, good. All right, cool. - Okay. I love you."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Yeah, I love you. Yeah, good night. - Bye. Good dinner."
Man Seeking Woman
"- so much. Well, this is great. - Oh, yeah."
Man Seeking Woman
"Uh, so what are-what are their names?"
Man Seeking Woman
"- Whose names? - The, uh..."
Man Seeking Woman
"- slobbering girls. - Oh, no, I didn't mean specific girls,"
Man Seeking Woman
"I just meant whoever's at the bar."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Oh. - Come on, let's go."
Man Seeking Woman
"Yeah, I-I don't know, man. Bars aren't really my thing."
Man Seeking Woman
"Josh, the only way you're gonna 69 with some flat-chested skanks"
Man Seeking Woman
"is if you go to the bar and talk to them."
Man Seeking Woman
"- You're not scared, are you? - I... no."
Man Seeking Woman
"You know how much I love..."
Man Seeking Woman
"- wooing women. - Great. It's on."
Man Seeking Woman
"Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Let's just pregame first."
Man Seeking Woman
"Christ."
Man Seeking Woman
"It's already pretty late."
Man Seeking Woman
"We'll just pound these beers real quick and then we'll go, okay?"
Man Seeking Woman
"Five minutes."
Man Seeking Woman
"♪ Not-not enough time ♪"
Man Seeking Woman
"Terrible way to drink beer. Ugh."
Man Seeking Woman
"They call them matches because they match. Look at a..."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Open up a matchbook, they all look the... - What? That's ridic..."
Man Seeking Woman
"(Muffled dance music playing)"
Man Seeking Woman
"Uh, da, da, uh, we need to eat something, I think."
Man Seeking Woman
"What?"
Man Seeking Woman
"Yeah, we-we need fuel for dancing and flirting."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Dude, it's getting late. - Let's just pound some Mexican food."
Man Seeking Woman
"Five minutes."
Man Seeking Woman
"Come on, this way."
Man Seeking Woman
"♪ Get-get up off my grind ♪"
Man Seeking Woman
"♪ Make-make-make-make, make 'em drop ♪"
Man Seeking Woman
"♪ Too much money, not enough time ♪"
Man Seeking Woman
"Um... you... wait, wait, let's just, uh,"
Man Seeking Woman
"pound a 10,000-piece Jigsaw puzzle first."
Man Seeking Woman
"(Classical music playing, applause)"
Man Seeking Woman
"It is on."
Man Seeking Woman
"Let's just pound this postmodern epic. Five minutes."
Man Seeking Woman
"You know what?"
Man Seeking Woman
"- Why would you say that? - I think you've just been stalling"
Man Seeking Woman
"These... girls like this don't get with guys like me."
Man Seeking Woman
"Dude, she just totally checked you out."
Man Seeking Woman
"Holy Moses. Yeah, okay, let's-let's get in there."
Man Seeking Woman
"It is on."
Man Seeking Woman
"Ooh, it's on."
Man Seeking Woman
"Oh, shit."
Man Seeking Woman
"Oh, man, it's super late already."
Man Seeking Woman
"Ooh, two clusters, divide and conquer."
Man Seeking Woman
"Josh: Uh, yeah? You don't want to stick together?"
Man Seeking Woman
"Hi. Uh... hi."
Man Seeking Woman
"Should I be in the center?"
Man Seeking Woman
"Where should I be? Okay. Ow!"
Man Seeking Woman
"Hi. Hi. Hey."
Man Seeking Woman
"That is just disgusting."
Man Seeking Woman
"Hold that. Uh, hey, I'm Josh."
Man Seeking Woman
"- Sure. Maybe a Cosmo? - That's a terrific idea."
Man Seeking Woman
"Uh, barkeep? That'll be, uh, two Cosmos."
Man Seeking Woman
"And..."
Man Seeking Woman
"- All right. - Thank you."
Man Seeking Woman
"So, uh, what's your name?"
Man Seeking Woman
"- Sara. - Sara."
Man Seeking Woman
"That is an oldie but a goodie."
Man Seeking Woman
"So, oldie but a goodie Sara, what..."
Man Seeking Woman
"(All laughing) (Mike whoops)"
Man Seeking Woman
"How-how is it so easy for you to talk to these girls?"
Man Seeking Woman
"- Like, what's your secret? - Dude, there's no secret."
Man Seeking Woman
"What-what did you just say?"
Man Seeking Woman
"- Say hi? - No, the other..."
Man Seeking Woman
"Spiral eyes. You know, it's how you get girls to like you."
Man Seeking Woman
"See?"
Man Seeking Woman
"I-I've never seen that before in my life."
Man Seeking Woman
"Your-your eyes turn into these spinning..."
Man Seeking Woman
"Spinning hypnotic spirals. Right. Spiral eyes."
Man Seeking Woman
"The day I hit puberty, a wizard appeared and taught me."
Man Seeking Woman
"- No. - Are you sure?"
Man Seeking Woman
"A tall guy, pointy hat, he had a long white beard?"
Man Seeking Woman
"I know what a wizard looks like."
Man Seeking Woman
"I'm saying I've never met one."
Man Seeking Woman
"Hold on. Wait a minute. Stop."
Man Seeking Woman
"Or, uh, current events."
Man Seeking Woman
"Like if there's something going on in the news."
Man Seeking Woman
"Uh, it's pretty crazy what's happening in the news, huh?"
Man Seeking Woman
"Of course you do."
Man Seeking Woman
"- That's your life? - Yeah."
Man Seeking Woman
"No wonder you were scared to come in here, man. Ooh."
Man Seeking Woman
"Who wants some of this?"
Man Seeking Woman
"Yeah, touch it. Touch it. Touch it, yeah."
Man Seeking Woman
"(Toilet flushing)"
Man Seeking Woman
"(Imitates gunshot)"
Man Seeking Woman
"(Zippering)"
Man Seeking Woman
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