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Clips from Seinfeld - The Slicer (S09E09)

"Jeez. Look at this."
Seinfeld
"This sandwich is terrible."
Seinfeld
"Look, look, look."
Seinfeld
"I haven't had a decent sandwich in 13 years."
Seinfeld
"Neither have I."
Seinfeld
"Hey. Well, our meat problems are solved."
Seinfeld
"- Where'd you get this thing? - I traded in my sausage press."
Seinfeld
"I mean, look how thin that is. See, that's all surface area."
Seinfeld
"The taste has nowhere to hide."
Seinfeld
"- Hey. - Hey. Slice?"
Seinfeld
"Welcome to flavor country."
Seinfeld
"Hey, that's pretty good."
Seinfeld
"Sara Sitarides?"
Seinfeld
"What's with you?"
Seinfeld
"Remember that next-door neighbor of mine?"
Seinfeld
"The apartment that always smells like potatoes?"
Seinfeld
"Your whole building smells like potatoes."
Seinfeld
"This jackass goes to Paris, leaves her alarm on."
Seinfeld
"It's been beeping since 3:30 this morning."
Seinfeld
"You know, that happened to Lomez, so he blew his neighbor's circuit."
Seinfeld
"- How did he do that? - Yeah, well, it's easy."
Seinfeld
"Just let me finish this mile-high and I'll be right with you."
Seinfeld
"Oh, we're gonna need a case of Kaiser Rolls."
Seinfeld
"I think we might have one left in the stockroom."
Seinfeld
"This hallway smells like potatoes."
Seinfeld
"- I know. I know. This is it. - Okay."
Seinfeld
"Oh, see, this socket, it's probably connected to her apartment."
Seinfeld
"So, what we'll do..."
Seinfeld
"...we'll take this paper clip..."
Seinfeld
"There you go."
Seinfeld
"- I think I'll let you do it. - No, no. It's easy."
Seinfeld
"Just do it quickly."
Seinfeld
"Well, I don't want to either."
Seinfeld
"- I thought you've done this before. - Yeah, well, I have, it's just..."
Seinfeld
"...it's no picnic."
Seinfeld
"- Oh, mama. - Are you okay?"
Seinfeld
"I'm gonna lose that nail."
Seinfeld
"You'd have no idea what it's like to have someone's life depend on you."
Seinfeld
"Well, I have this neighbor."
Seinfeld
"A joke."
Seinfeld
"Is it anything like hitting a homer in softball?"
Seinfeld
"- No. - Because I hit a whomper last week."
Seinfeld
"Here you go. Airbrushed you into sand and sky."
Seinfeld
"What did you do here?"
Seinfeld
"You took out the wrong guy."
Seinfeld
"But I'm still here. You took out the other guy."
Seinfeld
"You've really lost a lot of hair."
Seinfeld
"I am aware."
Seinfeld
"Seventy-six bucks."
Seinfeld
"How often do I make-?"
Seinfeld
"I've gotta buy a book."
Seinfeld
"The cat."
Seinfeld
"He took out Kruger?"
Seinfeld
"I just pray Kruger doesn't realize it's gone until this guy can fix it."
Seinfeld
"Slicer is indomitable."
Seinfeld
"Where'd you get that coat?"
Seinfeld
"You buy enough meat, they'll give you anything."
Seinfeld
"Kramer?"
Seinfeld
"When we blew the power, we must have shut off the automatic feeder."
Seinfeld
"What did he do about it?"
Seinfeld
"Well, he moved into a motel and the cat eventually died."
Seinfeld
"Well, this meowing is absolutely worse than the alarm."
Seinfeld
"- How was the doctor date? - It died on the table."
Seinfeld
"She spent an hour and a half making me feel like I'm worthless."
Seinfeld
"Well, you know, she's very focused."
Seinfeld
"Dermatology is her life."
Seinfeld
"Dermatology?"
Seinfeld
"Yes. She's a dermatologist."
Seinfeld
"The whole profession is, Just put some aloe on it."
Seinfeld
"The slicer. Elaine. Let's go."
Seinfeld
"- Where are we going? - The cat."
Seinfeld
"When are you going on your next date?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, what's the point?"
Seinfeld
"You're gonna pass up an opportunity..."
Seinfeld
"...to put that aloe-pusher in her place?"
Seinfeld
"A revenge date?"
Seinfeld
"That sounds more like you than me."
Seinfeld
"This could be so sweet, Jerry. Saving lives?"
Seinfeld
"She's one step above working at the Clinique counter."
Seinfeld
"Dermatologists. Skin doesn't need a doctor."
Seinfeld
"Of course not. Wash it, dry it, move on."
Seinfeld
"You're right. I'm gonna call her up and tell her off."
Seinfeld
"Oh, no, no, no. This has to be carefully orchestrated."
Seinfeld
"You go to a fancy diner, flowers-"
Seinfeld
"So you've done this?"
Seinfeld
"Almost."
Seinfeld
"Couldn't get the girl to go out with me a second time."
Seinfeld
"I think we're looking at half a millimeter."
Seinfeld
"Can it cut that thin?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, I've cut slices so thin I couldn't even see them."
Seinfeld
"How'd you know you cut it?"
Seinfeld
"Well, I guess, I just assumed."
Seinfeld
"Don't worry, kitty. Dinner's coming."
Seinfeld
"Look at that, huh? That's a hall of famer."
Seinfeld
"- Yeah, watch this baby slide. - Okay."
Seinfeld
"Come on, come on, go ahead. Go, kitty. Go."
Seinfeld
"Oh, my God, it worked. Wow."
Seinfeld
"- Can I borrow that thing for a while? - Oh, I don't think so."
Seinfeld
"- Why not? - Well, you're not checked out on it."
Seinfeld
"What do I have to know?"
Seinfeld
"Where do you turn it on?"
Seinfeld
"Right there."
Seinfeld
"But where does the meat go?"
Seinfeld
"The restaurant, flowers. This is so nice."
Seinfeld
"Well, I'm a classy guy."
Seinfeld
"- How's the life-saving business? - It's fine."
Seinfeld
"It must take a really, really big zit to kill a man."
Seinfeld
"What is with you?"
Seinfeld
"You call yourself life saver. I call you Pimple Popper, M.D."
Seinfeld
"Mr. Parry, how are you?"
Seinfeld
"I just want to thank you again for saving my life."
Seinfeld
"- I had skin cancer. - Skin cancer."
Seinfeld
"You were right, Kramer, this slicer is absolutely amazing."
Seinfeld
"Okay. Bye."
Seinfeld
"These heels are so uneven."
Seinfeld
"Here you go, Mr. Costanza."
Seinfeld
"What is this?"
Seinfeld
"This is a drawing?"
Seinfeld
"It looks real, doesn't it?"
Seinfeld
"This is a cartoon."
Seinfeld
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