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Clips from The Big Bang Theory - The Barbarian Sublimation (S02E02)

"We are about to enter Atzel's fortress."
The Big Bang Theory
"All right, Barry, we'll wait for you again, but you really should see a doctor."
The Big Bang Theory
"Penny, are you experiencing some sort of difficulty?"
The Big Bang Theory
"That Baldwin lock on your door uses traditional edge-mounted cylinders..."
The Big Bang Theory
"Why did you put your car key in the door lock?"
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"I'll tell you why. Today I had an audition."
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"Well, actually, insects are a dietary staple in many cultures."
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"He said he'll get here when he gets here."
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"Just when I think I've gotten the hang of sarcasm."
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"AFK."
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"Oh, I see."
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"Yes, but what does it stand for?"
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"I only bring it up because your ice cream's melting and it's starting to attract wildlife."
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"Uh-huh. Do I stay in the jungle or go towards the beach?"
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"- Wait, where are you going? - Go ahead. You're okay."
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"If you run into crocodiles, just kick them with your boots."
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"She hasn't had sex in six months."
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"And she ate a fly."
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"Level three and she thinks she's rich."
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"- Hi. - Hey, check it out."
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"Yeah, okay."
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"Listen, I need to talk to Sheldon."
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"No, that's what she said, Sheldon."
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"You can't slay the guard with a dagger."
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"Thank you. I really appreciate this."
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"Don't patronize me. Just get the sword."
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"What the frak?"
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"It's like some kind of weird comic-book crossover."
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"All right, give me, give me. I wanna kill the guard captain."
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"Sheldon."
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"- Sheldon. - Danger. Danger."
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"- Can we go talk in the living room? - I'm not wearing pajama bottoms."
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"Penny, people cannot be in my bedroom."
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"You were invited on a quest to the Black Castle?"
The Big Bang Theory
"Sheldon, you wanna catch me up again?"
The Big Bang Theory
"...to mediate all intra-departmental disputes."
The Big Bang Theory
"Dr. Dumb-ass."
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"- No, she doesn't. - No, I don't."
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"...and he put his name down on every slot for the next six months."
The Big Bang Theory
"- You need to get that, Dr. Cooper? - God, no."
The Big Bang Theory
"I have a series of important multi-loop calculations and simulations to run."
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"No, I told you, you're not prepared for the Sanctum of Burning Souls."
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"We'll talk when I get home."
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"She is interfering with my sleep. She is interfering with my work."
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"...l'm sure she'd be interfering with that too."
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"I don't know what else to do."
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"Well, what am I supposed to do?"
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"If you don't figure something out, I warn you..."
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"Okay. Uh...."
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"Yeah, get to the point. I'm about to level up here."
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"If a person doesn't have a sense of achievement in their real life..."
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"I'm just a little concerned about you and--"
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"I said, not now."
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"Okay, maybe later."
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"Me too."
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"She's really hooked on "Age of Conan." She's playing non-stop."
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"- Sheldon, wake up. - Danger, danger."
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"She comes into my room. No one's supposed to be in my room."
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"Mm. Testify."
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"Thank you."
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"I'll take the bullet."
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"Excuse me."
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"Uh...."
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"- Sheldon-- - Yip, yip, yip."
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"Yeah."
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"I must say, you're playing very well for a woman of 23?"
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"- Twenty-two. - Right, 22."
The Big Bang Theory
"- What happened to your group? - Dumped them. They're a bunch of wussies."
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"Frenzy stance."
The Big Bang Theory
"I'm filling out the online registration for your game."
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"...how do you prefer your sexual encounters to begin?"
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"Oh, awesome. Okay, I totally like to initiate. I'm a big old five."
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"Big old five."
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"Leonard, this is Tom."
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"Tom, however, has been chosen by science as a suitable mate for Penny."
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"Chosen by science."
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"Penny, I'd like you to meet Tom. Uh, Penny, this is Tom."
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"Got one assassin, three spell casters, no tank."
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"...who is a sexually passive outdoorsman?"
The Big Bang Theory
"- Who are you? - It is I, Sir Howard of Wolowitz."
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"Fellow warriors, this is Sheldor the Conqueror."
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"Now, this is a long run, so let's do another bladder check."
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"Sheldor is AFK."
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"Yes, I can't get my stupid door open."
The Big Bang Theory
"You appear to have put your car key in the door lock. Are you aware of that?"
The Big Bang Theory
"Yeah."
The Big Bang Theory
"All right, then."
The Big Bang Theory
"Would it be possible for you to do this a little more quietly?"
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"...whereas the key for your Volkswagen uses a center-cylinder system."
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"Thank you, Sheldon."
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"You're welcome."
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"It took me two hours to get there. I waited an hour for my turn."
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"Before I could start, they told me I look too Midwest for the part."
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"Too Midwest. What the hell does that even mean?"
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"The American Midwest was mostly settled by Scandinavian and Germanic peoples..."
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"- ...who have characteristic facial-- - I know what it means."
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"I haven't gotten a single acting job. I've accomplished nothing."
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"Haven't gotten a raise at work. Haven't even had sex in six months."
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"They're almost pure protein."
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"Oh, son of a bitch."
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"The condensation on your frozen foods..."
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"But returning to your key conundrum, you should call a locksmith."
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"- Have him open the door for you. - I did."
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"You're frustrated because he phrased his reply in a meaningless tautology?"
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"No. I am frustrated because I am a failure at everything..."
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"...and my breath smells like fly."
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"There, there."
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"Would you prefer to wait in our apartment?"
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"No, I'd rather sit on this freezing floor, sobbing like a 3-year-old."
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"For God's sake."
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"Make yourself comfortable."
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"Not there."
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"Sheldor is back online."
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"Sheldor?"
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"The Conqueror."
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"What are you doing?"
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"I'm playing "Age of Conan," an online multiplayer game..."
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"Oh."
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"Sheldor back online."
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"- What's AFK? - AFK."
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