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Clips from American Dad! - The Wrestler (S07E07)

"# Good morning, U.S.A. #"
American Dad!
"# I got a feeling that it's gonna be a wonderful day #"
American Dad!
"# Ba-bah-nah-bah-ahh #"
American Dad!
"# Ba-bah-nah-bah-ooh #"
American Dad!
"Yeah, I'm not much of a sports guy."
American Dad!
"Hey!"
American Dad!
"What about Bill Gates?"
American Dad!
"Before he blew out his A.C.L..."
American Dad!
"and had to do computers..."
American Dad!
"And I don't know the recipe for apple pie..."
American Dad!
"but that didn't stop me from making one."
American Dad!
"The Stan Smith Wrestling Museum..."
American Dad!
"But unlike Ross, I don't look like a Monchhichi."
American Dad!
"except for Sundays when the tour is free..."
American Dad!
"And no one's even come close to beating it."
American Dad!
"Yep, that record there is the mark I've made on this Earth..."
American Dad!
"Without it, I am nothing."
American Dad!
"ever since the former coach was caught teaching a style of wrestling..."
American Dad!
"I give you the most decorated wrestler in Pearl Bailey history, Stan Smith."
American Dad!
"Thank you."
American Dad!
"Anyone interested in joining the wrestling team, please raise your hand."
American Dad!
"Congratulations, Steve. You and your friends made the cut."
American Dad!
"fucked his wrestlers?"
American Dad!
"Uh-oh."
American Dad!
"Winning! Yeah!"
American Dad!
"He's undefeated."
American Dad!
"Make that two wins away."
American Dad!
"You know, maybe Barry should sit out a match. Get some rest."
American Dad!
"I got a bookie who'll take action on anything."
American Dad!
"I-I-I really don't think-"
American Dad!
"I said the boy wrestles!"
American Dad!
"But it's the foundation of who I am."
American Dad!
"Shut up, Charlotte!"
American Dad!
"Excuse me. Hi. Were you videotaping that?"
American Dad!
"If he breaks your record, I'm out of a job."
American Dad!
"Mission accomplished. I did him Tonya Harding style."
American Dad!
"With a-Kah! And a-Kah! And a-Kee!"
American Dad!
"Somebody beat up Snot!"
American Dad!
"Why? Why?"
American Dad!
"That's an old reference."
American Dad!
"I don't know. He should be here."
American Dad!
"Damn it! Now he's one win away from breaking my record."
American Dad!
"You know what kid I wanted to kill?"
American Dad!
"You never stared at my legs before? Okay."
American Dad!
"I'm sor-No, I'm-I'm-I'm in."
American Dad!
"Next match, Barry Robinson and Dimitri-"
American Dad!
"Krotchlikmioff. Dimitri Krotchlikmioff."
American Dad!
"- No, you don't. You have the opposite. - I know. Today's opposite day."
American Dad!
"Fine."
American Dad!
"One, two, three! Winner!"
American Dad!
"Yeah!"
American Dad!
"I can feel your pulse in my thigh."
American Dad!
"500 on Jimmy Cooper to go down in the egg toss."
American Dad!
"Boy's got shaky hands."
American Dad!
"That Russian kid from Lanceton is gonna beat my record. I have to stop him."
American Dad!
"Why don't we carry it this way?"
American Dad!
"# That's the beauty of livin' my life #"
American Dad!
"Yeah, sorry. You drove it off the lot."
American Dad!
"Stan, come to dinner. You don't want to be in the museum after hours."
American Dad!
"that's dressed like a Russian high school wrestler."
American Dad!
"##"
American Dad!
"Listen to that."
American Dad!
"These are some soundproof doors."
American Dad!
"Mmm. Mmm."
American Dad!
"Uh, you... have to pin him on his back."
American Dad!
"One, two-"
American Dad!
"- I want that record! - It belongs to me!"
American Dad!
"- Never! - Don't you have a job to go to?"
American Dad!
"Oh, my God."
American Dad!
""Longest Man-On-Man High School Sports Embrace.""
American Dad!
"It was mine."
American Dad!
"I don't think this is the right school for Suzy."
American Dad!
"# The sun in the sky has a smile on his face #"
American Dad!
"# Oh, boy, it's swell to say #"
American Dad!
"Straight A's, Daddy-o."
American Dad!
"Nope, I don't see any athletics on here."
American Dad!
"I'm more of a good grades guy, that's who I am."
American Dad!
"Son, good grades..."
American Dad!
"won't get you anywhere in life."
American Dad!
"athletic accomplishments."
American Dad!
"Bill Gates rushed..."
American Dad!
"for over 300 yards a game."
American Dad!
"Uh, I don't think that's right, Dad."
American Dad!
"Now, while that cools, come on."
American Dad!
"I want to show you something."
American Dad!
"dedicated to the high school wrestling career of Stan Smith."
American Dad!
"Um, I've lived in this house my whole life."
American Dad!
"How long has this been here?"
American Dad!
"Construction of the museum began in 1998."
American Dad!
"I should know because, like Ross on Friends, I'm a docent."
American Dad!
"I take the tour every day..."
American Dad!
"and the place gets a little..."
American Dad!
"ethnic."
American Dad!
"Steve, I was once a loser..."
American Dad!
"- just like you. - Hurtful."
American Dad!
"Then in my junior year I took up wrestling."
American Dad!
"It changed my life."
American Dad!
"I went from zero to hero to De Niro."
American Dad!
"You talkin' to me?"
American Dad!
"You talkin' to me?"
American Dad!
"Uh-"
American Dad!
"And the ultimate testament to my greatness..."
American Dad!
"is the state record I still hold."
American Dad!
"I certainly wouldn't have a great piece of ass like this."
American Dad!
"You know who else really appreciates my rump?"
American Dad!
"Charlotte."
American Dad!
"Oh, no!"
American Dad!
"The school doesn't have a wrestling program anymore."
American Dad!
"Ah, squiggle-bottom!"
American Dad!
"What? I am outraged!"
American Dad!
"Well, take your outrage elsewhere."
American Dad!
"I have another group coming through."
American Dad!
"We'll exit through the gift shop."
American Dad!
"Make sure to check out our Stan Smith pan flute rain forest music."
American Dad!
"##"
American Dad!
"yet somehow manages to be worse than the last."
American Dad!
"As many of you know, the wrestling program has been defunct for several years..."
American Dad!
"that would perhaps be more at home in a prison..."
American Dad!
"between a prisoner and a weaker, prettier prisoner."
American Dad!
"wants to bring the program back."
American Dad!
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