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Clips from The Office - Lecture Circuit: Part 2 (S05E05)

"(EXCLAIMS)"
The Office
"(CHUCKLES)"
The Office
"I've been driving too long."
The Office
"What did you do? I didn't do anything."
The Office
"What did you learn in there?"
The Office
"I'll bet you learned things, huh?"
The Office
"Like how to fashion a shiv."
The Office
"Hey, what the hell's going on?"
The Office
"Why don't you tell Jim where you were from ages 14 to 15?"
The Office
"In juvie."
The Office
"What? Juvie-nile detention center."
The Office
"For re... Got it."
The Office
"What did you do, huh?"
The Office
"If she's old enough to get married,"
The Office
"she's old enough to follow the law."
The Office
"My boyfriend dumped me, so I stole his boat."
The Office
"And I can't believe that you guys are"
The Office
"making me talk about this on my birthday."
The Office
"I thought you said yesterday was your birthday."
The Office
"Hey, you know what? I got you a cake."
The Office
"You did? I want to see the cake."
The Office
"And, ta-dah."
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"I hate it."
The Office
"Where did you even find a cake like this?"
The Office
"It doesn't even have my name on it."
The Office
"Do you guys know what my name is?"
The Office
"My name is Kelly. Right."
The Office
"I still don't know."
The Office
"I don't even know what the theme is! What's the theme?"
The Office
"Those aren't themes."
The Office
"There's always a theme."
The Office
"Nice job on the cake, bozo."
The Office
"Yes, we were expecting you. Have a seat."
The Office
"Thank you."
The Office
"Actually, she's on an HR retreat for the next three days."
The Office
"you could talk to A.J. He's a salesman here."
The Office
"She has a boyfriend."
The Office
"I'm so sorry, Michael."
The Office
"How could she do this to me, Pam?"
The Office
"I can't do the presentation, I can't."
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"Just thinking about seeing him,"
The Office
"and thinking about him getting to hold her"
The Office
"and getting to kiss her is just... Oh, God."
The Office
"I'm going through something, okay?"
The Office
"You know, when Holly gets back,"
The Office
"everyone will tell her what a great job you did."
The Office
"And then she'll move back to Scranton, and her boyfriend will die."
The Office
"One step at a time."
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"I can do this."
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"But why would we..."
The Office
"Good God!"
The Office
"(ALL GASPING)"
The Office
"Stop it, Mr. Ash! Bad cat, that is very bad."
The Office
"You stop it right now. I swear he is fixed."
The Office
"I know fixed, that ain't fixed. KEVIN: No way."
The Office
"here sully your image of them."
The Office
"They are good, decent cats."
The Office
"I got to go. I'll be back in an hour."
The Office
"Oh, stop that!"
The Office
"Busy."
The Office
"Hey, what's that show that she's always talking about?"
The Office
"Because she must want to shoot herself in the face."
The Office
"You know what? I could use a little help."
The Office
"You know what? I'm a little busy."
The Office
"Is that what you've been doing? Making a sign?"
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"It's not effeminate. It's festive."
The Office
"You've been making that sign"
The Office
"I know, I just read it on the sign."
The Office
"Good morning, Viet-Nashua!"
The Office
"Sales. Sales is what brings us together today."
The Office
""Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn about paper,""
The Office
"Well, we are going to find out today."
The Office
"Show of hands, how many of you are salesmen?"
The Office
"Let's see the salesmen."
The Office
"Oh, okay. Well, I know what the rest of you are thinking."
The Office
""Wow, yuck, salesmen are the worst, they are awful."
The Office
""They are so arrogant. They think the whole place revolves around them."
The Office
""Handsome, good listeners, funny. Mr. Wonderful.""
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"I'm a salesman, that's why I raised my hand."
The Office
"You're funny, very good and funny."
The Office
"Tell me, A.J., are you dating? Is there somebody you date?"
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"Yeah. Why, you interested?"
The Office
"(ALL CHUCKLING)"
The Office
"I have a question about discounts from distributors."
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"Is it serious?"
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"It's pretty serious. Yes."
The Office
"Does she ever talk about me?"
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"Excuse me?"
The Office
"It's all connected, shut up."
The Office
"Does she ever mention Michael Scott?"
The Office
"(SIGHS)"
The Office
"Does it feel good?"
The Office
"Does what feel good?"
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"Your life. Oh, wow."
The Office
"(GROANS)"
The Office
"My legs are sort of giving out."
The Office
"Long drive in the car, so let me..."
The Office
"...just continue."
The Office
"Oh, wow. Okay."
The Office
"Michael, get off the floor."
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"Just read the cards. No, no, no."
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"No, I'm okay. I'm all right."
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"Okay. Okay."
The Office
"That was weird, huh?"
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"It's all part of the presentation."
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"It was confusing, right?"
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"Because confusing situations happen to us all the time in our jobs."
The Office
"and the fact that I'm going to be doing the rest of the presentation."
The Office
"(IN SOUTHERN ACCENT) Sales is like a box of chocolates."
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"Forrest Gump."
The Office
"Blazer, freckles, penguin,"
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"K.D. Lang, Holly's boyfriend."
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"These mnemonic devices help to make a connection,"
The Office
"and then also to help you memorize names."
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"I have a chainsaw!"
The Office
"(IMITATES CHAINSAW HUMMING)"
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"He's a bad cat. Bad, bad cat."
The Office
"Do you hear me? Bad. You are bad."
The Office
"Is she cleaning the cat with her tongue?"
The Office
"(EXCLAIMS)"
The Office
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