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Clips from The Office - Lecture Circuit: Part 2 (S05E05)

""Prepare yourself for the Utica Chain Store Massacre.""
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"Juvie."
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"You remember Holly?"
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"She was the love of my life."
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"Okay. Let's go."
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"I didn't eat lunch."
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"I didn't eat all my lunch."
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"Hello, everyone."
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"Ice cream. Nice, Kevin. Looks good."
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"I am proud to announce that there is a new addition to the Martin family."
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"Where did you get that kind of money?"
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"Any cat, you mean."
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"DWIGHT: What did you do? KELLY: Stop yelling at me!"
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"Hey, Dwight, sounds like she was 14,"
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"so maybe we want to go a little easy."
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"What did you do?"
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"He told me it was his boat. It was actually his father's."
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"like Thelma & Louise, but with, like, a boat."
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"How do you hate it? It's a cake."
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"Well, there's no flowers or toys or..."
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"I forgot if there was an "E" between the "L" and the "Y.""
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"It's birthday. Frosting."
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"There's always a theme."
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"Okay, a little bit more closer to the sign."
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"Yeah."
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"Do I look okay? You look good."
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"A.J."
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"Yeah, he's her boyfriend. He's just over there."
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"Listen, when Jim was dating Karen,"
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"I didn't want to come to work."
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"I wanted to quit, but... Just, please, come on."
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"(SIGHS)"
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"And then she'll realize what she's missing."
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"Yeah, maybe. Maybe."
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"You can do this."
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"Is that what I think it is?"
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"No! MEREDITH: Awesome."
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"No, now listen, you can't let what you see"
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"KEVIN: The other one's watching."
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"And cups, and ice, and punch, and a cake."
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"We have a lot to do, and you are"
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"How do we deal with clients who say,"
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"So, okay, you're a salesman, what's your name?"
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"A.J. What kind of name is A.J.? What, do you race cars?"
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"Ouch. Okay. Good."
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"Yep, we will get to you."
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"Oh, God."
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"What does this have to do with sales?"
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"No. What are you talking about?"
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"(MICHAEL EXHALES)"
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"Yeah, yeah, I can't do this, Pam."
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"(EXHALES)"
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"I'm just trying to bridge the gap between what just happened"
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"You never know which vendor you're gonna get."
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"Excuse me, Petals, I'm looking for Mr. Ash."
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"No, you look at me when I talk to you."
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"(BOTH CHUCKLING)"
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"(IMITATES CAT HISSING)"
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"This is getting weird."
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"(CLEARS THROAT)"
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"The psychological issues that go behind licking a cat"
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"are not things I want to go into."
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"Want some pie? No."
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"It's a violation of her trust."
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"How?"
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"Yeah, I could read it."
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"What? I'm not in love with her."
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"Schrutes don't celebrate birthdays, idiot."
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"It started as a Depression-era practicality"
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"to the Natural History Museum in New York,"
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"It was awesome."
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"She said that?"
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"(SIGHS)"
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"Okay."
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"Why is there a Chiclet on my cake?"
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"on an hour of television or an hour of napping."
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"So what's it going to be, Kapoor?"
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"Watching TV at work is really cool."
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"Pick a nap. Nothing good is on right now."
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"Bonnie Hunt is on."
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"Okay, nap it is. Everyone out! Get out."
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"This is for you. And happy birthday, Kell."
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"Thanks."
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"Now go make up for all the work you missed"
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"Many happy returns."
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"(EXCLAIMS)"
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"Oh! Oh!"
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"Jabba the Hutt, Pizza the Hut."
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"You know what? Forget it."
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"I'm going around to all the branches,"
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"Shirty, mole, lazy eye, Mexico, baldy."
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"Hi, Kelly. Screw you."
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"You forgot her birthday."
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"...and I turn it on and I say,"
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"How's Jim? We're engaged."
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"Wow. Thank you."
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"She used to work for HR."
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"She just left and I never got closure."
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"And I feel like I need to go to Nashua and get closure."
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"Two."
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"It... Yeah."
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"Angela, you're more chipper than usual."
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"She's hypo-allergenic, she doesn't struggle when you try to dress her,"
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"she's a third-generation show cat."
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"Her father was in Meet the Parents."
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"Needless to say, she's very, very expensive."
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"For a cat? I can get you a kid for that."
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"He wouldn't have wanted that."
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"Seven grand. I've got to see that little bitch."
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"I have something better than a picture. Come on."
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"OSCAR: You have your cats on Nanny Cam."
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"Yeah. I mean, I usually try to take leave when I get a new cat,"
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"and this company still doesn't recognize cat maternity."
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"I mean, somebody has a kid, oh, sure, take off a year."
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"Right. Anyways, I just want to make sure"
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"She means more to me than anyone."
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"So, detour. We're now adding Nashua to the lecture circuit,"
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"so Michael can confront Holly and get some closure."
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"Nashua actually sounded very excited on the phone."
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"Because their office is only accessible by cross-country skis."
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