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Clips from American Dad! - In Country... Club (S05E05)

"No, $499."
American Dad!
"Streisand comes expensive or she doesn't come at all."
American Dad!
"Or would I?"
American Dad!
"Maybe if I was in the room with them, peeking from behind the curtain..."
American Dad!
"How would it appear on my credit card bill?"
American Dad!
"No, no, Stan, focus. Here's the deal."
American Dad!
"So you might as well just give it to me now and avoid happy hour at Shenanigans."
American Dad!
"- No! - Fine. Let it begin."
American Dad!
"Crab walk!"
American Dad!
"Should have played ball."
American Dad!
"# Rockets' red glare-#"
American Dad!
"Yeah, I don't get it. I thought people were supposed to sing better in the shower."
American Dad!
"I don't know. Maybe the problem isn't you."
American Dad!
"Maybe- Maybe I'm not a great vocal coach."
American Dad!
"No. It's more than that. There's something missing."
American Dad!
"Something empty and soulless about your performance."
American Dad!
"- Hmm. - That's it."
American Dad!
"is because Steven Tyler actually lived in an elevator the summer he wrote it."
American Dad!
"Steve, he's a rock star living in a kick-ass elevator."
American Dad!
"You don't think he's getting laid? Oh, and it's summertime."
American Dad!
"Since you can't go to a real war, a reenactment is the next best thing."
American Dad!
"I've always wanted to go to a Civil War reenactment."
American Dad!
"It's not a Civil War reenactment."
American Dad!
"Those things are for historians and people who hate blacks."
American Dad!
"These guys are hard-core reenactors."
American Dad!
"[Explosions, Gunfire]"
American Dad!
"- [Shouting] - ##["Fortunate Son"]"
American Dad!
"- [Engine Running] - # Some folks are born made to wave the flag #"
American Dad!
"# Ooh, they're red, white and blue ##"
American Dad!
"This chopper will take you to base camp!"
American Dad!
"[Imitating Helicopter]"
American Dad!
"Get in! [Imitating Helicopter]"
American Dad!
"Sergeant, over here!"
American Dad!
"[Grunting, Screams]"
American Dad!
"Platoon, gather round!"
American Dad!
"The Vietcong may be making their move tonight!"
American Dad!
"- We need a watchman! - Steve will do it."
American Dad!
"- Dad. - We're counting on you tonight, Steve."
American Dad!
"Here, I'll even loan you my lucky machete."
American Dad!
"Leave the blade in the sheath so it doesn't get dull."
American Dad!
"Dad, I don't know if I can stand watch all night."
American Dad!
"Steve, this is an opportunity to step up and be a hero."
American Dad!
"Then you'll know what it takes to really sing our national anthem."
American Dad!
"For once, I want you to do fine."
American Dad!
"# By the dawn's early light #"
American Dad!
"[Sobs]"
American Dad!
"- Steve, what happened? Man, what a letdown! - [Grunts]"
American Dad!
"Hey, my hand on fire?"
American Dad!
"What? No."
American Dad!
"Dead! Everyone's dead!"
American Dad!
"Their spirits are dancing all around us."
American Dad!
"And you men will be safe if you stick with me!"
American Dad!
"No!"
American Dad!
"Let's just go to the Snack Stop and get some grilled cheese, man."
American Dad!
"No! We have to save my dad. I let him down."
American Dad!
"Dad, can you hear me?"
American Dad!
"Steve, it's dark and wet. There's golf carts. You have to-"
American Dad!
"We don't know. We're from Baltimore."
American Dad!
"Thank you."
American Dad!
"[Marty] I heard you the first time!"
American Dad!
"[Speaking Mock Asian Language]"
American Dad!
"Roger, let me go!"
American Dad!
"You give me code now! Now!"
American Dad!
"Now, now, now!"
American Dad!
"Eh, wise guy, huh?"
American Dad!
"Roger, stop! I'm never gonna give you that pay-per-view code!"
American Dad!
"We see."
American Dad!
"It's 700 pages."
American Dad!
"Well, his hose spattered all over my European mosaic floor and I slipped in it."
American Dad!
"Samantha's story made me wonder..."
American Dad!
"- [Steve Narrating] It was just the three of us now. - ##["White Rabbit"]"
American Dad!
"We were headed up Fanangong River towards Gobbley Goo Bay."
American Dad!
"- Crap! - [Man] Boom!"
American Dad!
"My legs! It blew off my damn legs!"
American Dad!
"You can make it, Buckle!"
American Dad!
"Oh, my God, that hurt! Ow! Ow!"
American Dad!
"- # Go ask Alice # - Oh, no! It still hurts!"
American Dad!
"- # And you know you're going to fall # - And I was alone..."
American Dad!
"# Smoking caterpillar ##"
American Dad!
"Damn it! Stan gave me a fake code!"
American Dad!
"Well, good thing I still have him tied up."
American Dad!
"And you know I still have my funny hat and shirt."
American Dad!
"I will... for the bird. I want it set free."
American Dad!
"Fine!"
American Dad!
"You got what you want! Now give me that code!"
American Dad!
"[Clicking]"
American Dad!
"- [Beeps] - 48, 12? Wait. He used my pants size?"
American Dad!
"Ugh, I'm disgusting!"
American Dad!
"Sorry, Hayley. Roger tricked me."
American Dad!
"He said he was gonna dress me up as Mr. Wendal from the Arrested Development song."
American Dad!
"Give me the real bird, Roger! Where is it?"
American Dad!
"- # Now my little friend chirps along # - ## [Whistles]"
American Dad!
"- # Ha, ha # - ## [Whistles]"
American Dad!
"- # Ha, ha # - ## [Whistles]"
American Dad!
"- # Ha, ha ## - ## [Whistles]"
American Dad!
"# And when the band plays Hail to the Chief #"
American Dad!
"# Ooh, they point the cannon at you, Lord #"
American Dad!
"[Coughing]"
American Dad!
"Your chin is right on my hip bone, Kevin."
American Dad!
"Please, give me some rice."
American Dad!
"I'll do anything."
American Dad!
"I'll make you feel good."
American Dad!
"Steve, you did it! You saved me! I'm so proud of you!"
American Dad!
"You should have seen him. My boy the war hero."
American Dad!
"Steve's gonna sing the crap out of that national anthem now, aren't you, Steve?"
American Dad!
"Did you have fun at the reenactment, honey?"
American Dad!
"That's right. Real war heroes don't need to talk about it."
American Dad!
"Tons."
American Dad!
"Let's hope it's not the Hell's Angels."
American Dad!
"- [Laughing] - [Rim Shot]"
American Dad!
"- # Oh, say-# - [Fireworks Exploding]"
American Dad!
"[Gasps]"
American Dad!
"- You're totally dead, Bob! - It's just usl Just let me keep playing!"
American Dad!
"# Say can you see #"
American Dad!
"I-I can't see 'em. They're in the trees."
American Dad!
"Steve, snap out of it."
American Dad!
"Mr. Smith, can I speak to you in the hallway?"
American Dad!
"Your son appears to be suffering from P.T.S.D. - post-traumatic stress disorder."
American Dad!
"But, Doctor, that's impossible. He was only in a reenactment."
American Dad!
"- Is that a thing? - I've never heard of it."
American Dad!
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