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Clips from Parks and Recreation (2009) - Sex Education (S05E05)

"- were you alone in your car? - Yes."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Your Honor, this was an accident."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I was tweeting."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
""9:15. Four green lights in a row. #blessed""
Parks and Recreation (2009)
""9:17. Drive faster, blue Civic. Daaaaaamn. #soccermoms""
Parks and Recreation (2009)
""#unbreakable."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
""#what'sMr.Glassuptothesedays?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and off your electronic devices."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Any slipups, and that week becomes a month."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Bailiff!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I just got back from that Dude Ranch with Ricky."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- Just call him "Ricky." - Okay, great."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Great news: Lots of old people have chlamydia."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Seniors in Pawnee have a lot of time on their hands,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"with a little bit of charm and a lot of crabs."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"'cause they're close to death."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and I'm sorry, sir, but you have to be under 40"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"which I used to use every day."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Congressman Murray, I'm Ben Wyatt,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Thank you, Ben."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"And thank you all for your hard work."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Terrific."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- Don't say that. - Ben!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Okay, great. I'm councilwoman Leslie Knope,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I know this is a personal question,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"the greatest risk you face"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I don't know, I thought we were just"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Do you have any bookmarks?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Tomorrow, we'll go to my cabin in the woods."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"It's so far away from civilization,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"the electric company is not even aware"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"If you encounter this scenario,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and pretend like this never happened."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"are the town's morality watchdogs."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Marcia is motivated, calculating, and hyper-vigilant,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"This, that's happening here, is not allowed!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Please forget everything this horrible woman has told you."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You're a regular Paul Bunyan."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"There's no time for the edge network."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I still think we should find a computer"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Talk about all the things you do on those screens,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"tumblr, and Instagram."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"See? That was easy."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Then I like to go on reddit."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- You like it? - It's not my favorite shirt,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"We all have some crazy urges from time to time,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"J.K., you guys."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"And 100% of Pawneeans are "perd-verts.""
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"What do we do?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Objective studies have shown"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and frankly, almost arousing,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- Change the law. - The people support this."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I couldn't fight those numbers even if I wanted to."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I did eat all the bananas,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Shh! Look."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Must eat babies for fuel.""
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and he's watching old speeches to bone up or something."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"you can learn about anything."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and he was in that classic sex tape"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"with Kim Kardashian,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Suddenly, you're on the Mars Attacks page."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"We don't have a lot in common, but we chat quite a bit."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You can type "What up," and then a cute, little ghost,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"There's even a little Indian guy,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- It seems like-- - Okay, that's enough!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Perfect."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
""Chapter three."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Why are you doing this? You're gonna get up there"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I get that. I just--"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You know where we're going."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You're dressed like an abstinence girl"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and then a bear jumped in front of the deer!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Yes, I went to Best Buy and bought a phone."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Thank you very much, Marshall."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Hello, my aged friends."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- I don't remember that. - Well, I was."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"until marriage."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You put a condom on it, and you pull the tip like this,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Tell you what, condoms for everybody!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"It's a censure from the mayor's office."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I know I'm supposed to help educate the public,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"you stick to the letter of the law,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Made me happy that I voted for you"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Okay, this is great, just make sure"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"that you don't go too tight on him, all right?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"He turns it on when he has to,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"to test the satellite feed?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Okey-dokey."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Just run through some of your stump speech."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"That's great. Good."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"God, I love him. He's the best."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Please forgive me, Ron. Please, Ron?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I spend a lot of time looking at screens"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"a lot of the stuff in my real life"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"isn't going that great."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"So I'd rather play Doodle Jump then think about that."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Hey. I just wanted to come lend my support."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Well, if you ask me, you were elected to lead"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I kind of lost myself in this relationship."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I turned all my jeans into Daisy Dukes."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"he'll never lasso another heifer"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Leslie, what exactly does "censure" mean?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"That doesn't really apply here."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Perd, I'd like to apologize."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"have the highest rates of teen pregnancy and STDs."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I know that most of you don't agree with me on this,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Next up on the program, we hear from you, our fans,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I'm so bored."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"It is called Auto Repair Manual: 1982."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You will read this book from cover to cover,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I will not report you to the judge,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Look a man in the eye when you speak with him."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"find Leslie. She lives for that crap."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Get to work."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I'm gonna go right now and drink, like, 1,000 Red Bulls"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Man, you are just a machine."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Get stuff done."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- I'll try to help. - You're the greatest."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Oh, no! They got you!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Ha, ha, ha, ha, ah, ha, ha."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
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