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Clips from The Good Place - Mindy St. Claire (S01E01)

"- See? - Why are you like this?"
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"We're going to a Medium Place."
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"and I want some gum and some football cards"
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"Nailed it."
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"What I will consider is the recent development"
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"because she is a wonderful, selfless..."
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"A compromise was made:"
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"Also, there's some spoken word poetry"
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"I withdrew my life savings, and I was gonna start"
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"'Cause I love cocaine."
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"Do you have any? I'm just... I shouldn't..."
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"- No. - Oh, yeah. I mean, I was just..."
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"to start the Mindy St. Clair Rescue Alliance, yeah."
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"for all those good person points or not?"
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"Eleanor, we've got a surprise for you."
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"Yeah, no, I get it. It's just, I know"
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"that means I gotta pitch in to get Lisa a cake"
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"I don't know, but the meaner she is,"
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"arrived here by accident,"
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"and I believe he's on the train with Eleanor."
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"Yes, voluntarily sacrificing herself"
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"I've been asleep in goo for the last 29 years, so I'm good."
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"Hey, you wanna grab a drink or something?"
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"Uh, no, I kind of have my own private time routine."
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"It's my 24th birthday! What! Hot tiara, girl."
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"This is getting away from us. We need to do something quickly."
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"was the old Eleanor. She changed."
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"Thank you for these testimonials."
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"Yeah, he belongs in the Bad Place."
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"What if you're here, and I'm like this?"
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"My name's Shawn."
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"- What? - What?"
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"- We literally owe it to them. - If they're really"
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"Sorry, Eleanor, but I can't let us leave."
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"No, it's time to own up, dude."
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"Ugh, your mother's coming? Oh, boy, hide the silverware."
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"And you blew the other half trying to frame her boyfriend."
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"It was so stupid. He was already guilty, dumbass."
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"Chidi, Tahani, we're back to save your souls."
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"But we're here. We came here as fast as we could, and we're here."
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"now what?"
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"and the Big Guy thinks it's time for you to fly solo."
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"- Agreed. - Yes."
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"Hang on. That judge guy just said"
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"everyone here has done bad things."
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"Maybe I was brought here by mistake,"
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"Okay, well, it's settled then."
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"Eleanor and Jianyu are leaving."
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"You do have feelings for her, don't you?"
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"What's gonna happen to me when Jason and Fake Eleanor go"
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"Okay, team meeting."
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"Hi, guys. Sorry to interrupt."
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"- What? - Awesome."
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"or Tahani or someone else,"
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"I get to stay here with my wife forever!"
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"Which one's which? I always forget."
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"Black is regular, orange is anti-matter."
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"How's it coming?"
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"I'll never be at peace."
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"Yes! We get to stay, baby! We did it!"
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"which means that you and Real Eleanor and Jason can stay."
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"but I truly believe our love will make us happy."
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"No, I'm going with Real Eleanor!"
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"- What? - Trust me, I've got this."
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"No, it's me and Chidi. Call the train."
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"The real mistakes were Jason and Eleanor."
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"I thought to myself, "Man, this is torture.""
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"but it's actually a filthy dumpster"
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"full of our worst anxieties."
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"Tahani tortured Jason"
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"Jason tortured my because I was sure he would blow our cover,"
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"Please, don't ask me that right now."
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"and everything Michael has done"
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"And I had the perfect bud hole and no dudes to share it with."
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"- and I think we should stay... - No, stop, Vicky."
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"This was supposed to be my big moment."
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"I'm going to design an afterlife"
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"We've tried this."
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"It can work."
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"out of this insane gambit."
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"But take me through it. How would this work, exactly?"
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"No, Todd, we have it until 3:00."
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"Ed, you play Bart, a former private eye."
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"Hey, guys? It's Michael!"
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"When I confessed."
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"I mean, after that it was just a crazy scramble for all of us."
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"and obviously, we didn't anticipate"
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"Oh, yeah. Janet isn't one of us."
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"like, $1,000 for charity, or whatever?"
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"Uh, $60 billion, actually, so."
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"was to snog Ryan Gosling at the Met Ball."
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"Which I did."
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"But wait, why is Chidi here?"
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"You're right."
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"Well, if it'll make you feel any better,"
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"but we also took care of each other."
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"We improved each other,"
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"So, the only thing you succeeded in doing"
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"Oh, Eleanor. That's it!"
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"Yeah, I'm gonna erase your memories,"
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"Ya bas..."
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"_"
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"Eleanor, come on in."
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"Your medical relief mission to Kazakhstan,"
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"So where are you from, Chris?"
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"Yeah, you gotta."
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"♪ And now ♪"
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"♪ The end is near ♪"
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"♪ And so I face ♪"
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"♪ The final curtain ♪"
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"- Ow! What the hell? - Walk it off, Lululemon."
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"♪ I'll say it clear ♪"
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"♪ I'll state my case ♪"
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"♪ Of which I'm certain ♪"
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"♪ I've lived ♪"
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"♪ A life that's full ♪"
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"♪ I traveled each and... ♪"
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""Live every day like it's your last.""
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"Bite me. I'ma live forever, bitch."
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"Ma'am? It's $132.21."
The Good Place
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