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Clips from The Simpsons - Lisa's Rival (S06E06)

"Sweetener."
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"...said foodstuff shall be turned over to the village idiot."
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"Since I don't see him around, start shoveling!"
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"Why am I rotting away in the second grade instead of being skipped ahead?"
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"Did you talk to anyone at school? Make a few calls on my behalf?"
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"You could've been nicer to Principal Skinner, if you know what I mean."
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"Homer, I appreciate you making dinner, but this food tastes a little strange."
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"That's because I've loaded it with sugar!"
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"Marge, our ship has come in."
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"I found 500 pounds of sugar in the forest..."
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"...that I'm gonna sell directly to the consumer."
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"And all for a low, low price of one dollar per pound."
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"But the store sells sugar for 35 cents a pound."
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"And it doesn't have nails and broken glass in it."
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"Those are prizes."
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"A blasting cap."
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"Yes!"
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"Very nice. Now Allison Taylor, also trying for first-chair saxophone."
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"This is a very tough decision, girls. You're both very good."
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"That was a close one, Lisa, but you made it."
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"No, you regained consciousness. Allison got first chair."
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"Oh, it was just a dream."
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"I won first chair?"
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"No, you regained consciousness. Allison got first chair."
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"And believe me, this is not a dream!"
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"I need help. There's another girl at school..."
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"- I feel so average. - You'll always be number one to me."
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"Hello! First born within earshot."
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"Oh, for crying..."
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"No matter how good you are, there's always someone better."
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"I thought I had the tallest hair, but that trip to Graceland really opened my eyes."
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"Sugarman!"
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"Door to door sugar? What a marvelous idea."
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"Mother, I'm a big boy. I can do as I wish."
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"Hey, Allison, what's the answer to number nine?"
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"- I can't tell you, Ralph. - I can't tell you either, Ralph."
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"Leave me alone."
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"- Brainiac! - Nerd!"
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"You're such a geekazoid!"
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"That used to be my face in the mud."
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"I can't stand to see you so miserable, Lis."
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"That gives me an idea."
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"Note for later: Put rubber spider down Lisa's dress."
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"Hey, I know! How about if I dig up some dirt on Allison?"
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"Remember how I got Milhouse on America's Most Wanted?"
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"Suit yourself. If you change your mind, here's my card."
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"Don't need it. You live in the room next to me."
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"I found a dollar while I was waiting for the bus."
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"...you lost 40 dollars by not going to work."
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"The plant said if you don't come tomorrow, don't bother coming Monday."
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"Four-day weekend!"
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"Hey, I am above average."
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"So what if Allison's ahead of me? There's no shame in being second."
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"...the second-best band in America."
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"Why would they come to our concert to boo us?"
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"Lis, I did some checking on this Allison."
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"And I know it's against all your moral fibers..."
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"Yep. She's clean as a bean."
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"But I did tip off the feds..."
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"I should be Allison's friend, not her competitor."
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"I mean, she is a wonderful person."
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"Way to go, Lis. I mean, why compete with someone..."
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"...who's just gonna kick your butt anyway."
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"It's great of you to come over. I really want us to be friends."
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"You're a wonderful person."
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"- I've heard great things about you. - Oh, really? I..."
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"We take names and rearrange the letters to form a description of that person."
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"- Genuine class. - Very good."
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"Jeremy Irons."
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"Perhaps you'd like to bounce it."
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"- What's this? - It's for the school diorama competition."
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"You're finished already? But the competition isn't for weeks!"
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"Lisa, we're talking dioramas. Who could wait?"
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"I chose "The Tell-Tale Heart" by Edgar Allan Poe."
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"See, this is the bedroom where the old man was murdered."
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"And, look, I used an old metronome to simulate the heartbeat..."
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"...that drove the killer insane."
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"Neat, huh?"
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"Must protect sugar."
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"Homer."
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"- Homer! - What?"
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"Forget about guarding the stupid sugar."
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"You're being completely paranoid."
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"Oh, am I? Am I really?"
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"Hello."
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"- Goodbye. - You see, Marge? You see?"
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"Never! Never, Marge."
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"I can't live the button-down life like you."
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"I want it all. The terrifying lows, the dizzying highs..."
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"...the creamy middles."
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"Sure, I might offend a few of the blue noses..."
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"Oh, I'll never be the darling of the so-called city fathers..."
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"...who cluck their tongues, stroke their beards..."
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"...and talk about, "What's to be done with this Homer Simpson?""
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"No!"
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"Hey, get off my sugar! Bad bees! Bad!"
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"Oh, they're defending themselves somehow."
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"Look, Bart. It almost killed me..."
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"...but I handcrafted all 75 characters from Oliver Twist."
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"The important thing is that we survived."
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"Who am I kidding? There's no way I'm ever gonna beat Allison!"
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"Sure there is."
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"But it involves being a bit underhanded. A bit devious, a bit..."
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"I'll do whatever it takes."
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"Tomorrow, when Allison comes out..."
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"...we spray her with the hose, soaking her from head to toe."
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"Enough with the hose!"
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"Well, sure is quiet in here today."
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"- I'm afraid I don't. - You see..."
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"...bees usually make a lot of noise. No noise..."
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"...suggests no bees."
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"- To the Beemobile! - You mean your Chevy?"
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"Yes."
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"Very clever, Simpson."
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"We're willing to pay you $2000 for the swarm."
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"Deal!"
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"No! My sugar is melting!"
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"Melting! Oh, what a world!"
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"I'm sorry, Homie."
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"A mountain of sugar is too much for one man."
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