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Clips from Taxi - Come as You Aren't (S01E01)

"( theme music playing )"
Taxi
"It's okay, I guess."
Taxi
"I bet you're wondering"
Taxi
"The law says you have to take me wherever I want to go."
Taxi
"Hey, wait a minute, Mister!"
Taxi
"Nope!"
Taxi
"It's one little thing."
Taxi
"Oh, I get it."
Taxi
"Like what?"
Taxi
"( doorbell ringing )"
Taxi
"Stop envying them."
Taxi
"I'll be right back."
Taxi
"the cheer I'm about to deafen you with."
Taxi
"We have?"
Taxi
"Thank you."
Taxi
"I mean, we really had a fight."
Taxi
"Thanks."
Taxi
"Why am I being modest?"
Taxi
"I'm alone."
Taxi
"It's perfect."
Taxi
"Metropolitan Museum."
Taxi
"how you got a cab so fast in this rain."
Taxi
"Well, it's because I've been sitting here admiring"
Taxi
"this window display."
Taxi
"You see, I work here part-time at this art gallery."
Taxi
"Uh, excuse me, if you don't mind,"
Taxi
"I really don't feel much like talking."
Taxi
"Just take me to the Metropolitan, okay?"
Taxi
"Oh, I wasn't talking, I was just..."
Taxi
"Hey!"
Taxi
"I don't know how to make it any clearer than that."
Taxi
"Please take me to the Metropolitan."
Taxi
"Okay. You charmed me into it."
Taxi
"Where you going?"
Taxi
"You said the Metropolitan Museum."
Taxi
"I meant the one in New York. Why didn't you stay on Madison?"
Taxi
"It's shorter this way. You said you were in a hurry."
Taxi
"You are taking a longer route than you need to."
Taxi
"It's not any longer. You know, wait a minute."
Taxi
"Are you accusing me of jacking up the fare?"
Taxi
"No. I'm accusing you of trying."
Taxi
"Unfortunately, I caught you."
Taxi
"Hey, look, Mister. I swear I'm not trying to cheat you."
Taxi
"Now if you want, I can take you back where I picked you up,"
Taxi
"and we can start over and I'll take a different route."
Taxi
"Thanks, but I've seen Jersey."
Taxi
"Okay, out of the cab."
Taxi
"It's pouring rain out there."
Taxi
"There's no way you can make me leave this cab."
Taxi
"Rape... rape... rape!"
Taxi
"You may have a little trouble getting that story to stick"
Taxi
"when the police find out"
Taxi
"I'm the National Secretary for the Gay Liberation Force."
Taxi
"We'll be there in a few minutes."
Taxi
"who you try and rip off."
Taxi
"Look, Mister, I realize we've had our differences"
Taxi
"but you owe me $2.85."
Taxi
"Here's a dollar. I'm not paying for the scenic route."
Taxi
"Oh."
Taxi
"Hey, come back here!"
Taxi
"He's faster than he looks."
Taxi
"Come on, come on."
Taxi
"Jacks or better."
Taxi
"All right, give me something good."
Taxi
"Not if I can help it."
Taxi
"Oh, sweet heaven."
Taxi
"Did I tip my hand again?"
Taxi
"Only to the trained eye."
Taxi
"Why do I do that all the time?"
Taxi
"Hi, guys."
Taxi
"Hey, Elaine. What do you say?"
Taxi
"I'm not sure."
Taxi
"I just had a really bad fare today."
Taxi
"Hey, Bobby, she thinks she had a bad fare."
Taxi
"What happened?"
Taxi
"I had the QANTAS koala bear get carsick in my cab."
Taxi
"And you don't want to know what a koala bear does"
Taxi
"when he gets carsick."
Taxi
"Hey, Alex, could I talk to you for a moment?"
Taxi
"Huh? Yeah, sure."
Taxi
"Deal me out."
Taxi
"I'll sit in for you."
Taxi
"What's wrong?"
Taxi
"I feel really strange."
Taxi
"Why? What is it?"
Taxi
"Well, you know that art gallery where I work part-time?"
Taxi
"And where they treat me like I was some sort of receptionist?"
Taxi
"Yeah. You mean the place where you work as a receptionist."
Taxi
"Yeah. Well, they let me design"
Taxi
"their new window display for their new exhibit"
Taxi
"and everybody loved what I did."
Taxi
"Now, it's just staring out on Madison Avenue."
Taxi
"People are even congratulating me."
Taxi
"No wonder you're down."
Taxi
"You realized your lifelong ambition."
Taxi
"I know, but it just doesn't seem like my life, you know."
Taxi
"Things like this never happen to me."
Taxi
"That's why I got a little crazy and I pushed."
Taxi
"I invited them all to a party, and they accepted."
Taxi
"Oh, hey, sounds like you're on a roll."
Taxi
"Let me know how it turns out."
Taxi
"I was kind of hoping that maybe you'd come."
Taxi
"See, I'd really like to have one person there"
Taxi
"that I don't care about impressing."
Taxi
"How can I turn down an invitation like that?"
Taxi
"Yeah, and one more thing-- when you're at the party"
Taxi
"can you remember that nobody knows that I'm a cab driver?"
Taxi
"See, if they knew I drove a cab at night"
Taxi
"they'd find it a little unusual."
Taxi
"I can't afford to be unusual yet."
Taxi
"So you actually lie about your job?"
Taxi
"I don't lie. I fudge."
Taxi
"I'm kind of hoping that maybe you won't tell them"
Taxi
"that you're a cab driver, either."
Taxi
"Oh, no. I won't do that, Elaine."
Taxi
"Oh, come on..."
Taxi
"No, it's not just one little thing."
Taxi
"Hey, sure it is. Ask anybody."
Taxi
"Hey, guys, can you believe him?"
Taxi
"He won't tell one little lie for me."
Taxi
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