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Clips from Archer (2009) - Animation (S03E03)

"ARCHER: Ugh. What is that? I've never smelled that smell in America."
Archer (2009)
"I live in a transitional neighborhood."
Archer (2009)
"A surprise! I hate surprises."
Archer (2009)
"I mean, except surprise fellatio."
Archer (2009)
"I was going to say a literal shithole."
Archer (2009)
"Jesus Christ! But you were gonna flay me like a perch?"
Archer (2009)
"Are we doing--? Did I mention I have a surprise for you?"
Archer (2009)
"Krieger, equal parts soju sangria and fear-induced adrenaline means I have to pee."
Archer (2009)
"And not in that sick bathroom, so-- There's a utility sink in my lab."
Archer (2009)
"Uh, is the surprise that you're pirating cable?"
Archer (2009)
"No!"
Archer (2009)
"Yeah, man. Flick her titty."
Archer (2009)
"I love you."
Archer (2009)
"Why do you have an erection?"
Archer (2009)
"ARCHER: Here they are, God, geese at the trough."
Archer (2009)
"What? Are you--"
Archer (2009)
"--People standing around for?"
Archer (2009)
"Geez, somebody's raring to go."
Archer (2009)
"Still crazy hot."
Archer (2009)
"What, by the dead woman standing here? Dressed like a whore."
Archer (2009)
"She's obviously a double, carved up by KGB plastic surgeons to look like Katya, and--"
Archer (2009)
"How dare you fail to recognize my greatest accomplishment to date?"
Archer (2009)
"Hang on, hang on. Katya-person, I'm still processing the fact that you're a cyborg."
Archer (2009)
"Who are you, Horace Greeley? And also, was I not clear about that?"
Archer (2009)
"Just because she's a cyborg, doesn't mean you can feel her up."
Archer (2009)
"I feel love, I laugh, I sometimes cry. Albeit a saline-lubricant solution."
Archer (2009)
"Which reminds me, we need to talk about other, uh, internal--"
Archer (2009)
"Yeah, that's what I'm-- And Katya..."
Archer (2009)
"But Ms. Archer said-- What, Pam?"
Archer (2009)
"Babe, you wanna...? Oh, uh, sorry, darling."
Archer (2009)
"...someone like her working at ISIS, since-- Since you wanna screw affirmative action?"
Archer (2009)
"That, that-- Hey, don't worry about Barry."
Archer (2009)
"I'm never gonna let him hurt you again, baby."
Archer (2009)
"If I ever see that zloi mudak again, I-- Don't worry, you won't!"
Archer (2009)
"So just go with Pam to do your paperwork."
Archer (2009)
"So don't care."
Archer (2009)
"So RoboCop, pro or con?"
Archer (2009)
"Nikolai has been murdered?"
Archer (2009)
"But if I find out the KGB is behind this-- You won't!"
Archer (2009)
"They're not! I'll part her out and sell her for scrap."
Archer (2009)
"She didn't break my heart, Mother, she was murdered."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, please, I bet the gene pool of Polynesia is irreparably altered."
Archer (2009)
"Which turns out to be kind of a panty-dropper."
Archer (2009)
"I understand this, how do you say, "grief-banging"?"
Archer (2009)
"See? Is she not something special?"
Archer (2009)
"Well, the love of my life, this smoking-hot woman..."
Archer (2009)
"...who can free her child from the psychological prison she spent a lifetime erecting?"
Archer (2009)
"Yeah, hey, me either, vis-é-vis Mother."
Archer (2009)
"Baby, I don't care about the chips and gears, and, I assume, some hinges..."
Archer (2009)
"Yes, no, yes. Yes."
Archer (2009)
"Not gonna lie, having some déjé vu here."
Archer (2009)
"Cranberry raisins. Craisins?"
Archer (2009)
"Don't take this the wrong way, but duh. I mean our love, darling."
Archer (2009)
"They're not coming back."
Archer (2009)
"Da, please, Woodhouse, I think boldness is needed."
Archer (2009)
"...you need to jump in a time machine and have a threesome with Oedipus and Sigmund Freud."
Archer (2009)
"The old man knew his Scotch."
Archer (2009)
"You are such an asshole!"
Archer (2009)
"...from Frank. Sinatra!"
Archer (2009)
"One minutes."
Archer (2009)
"Is just, I know he has very good reason to hate..."
Archer (2009)
"ARCHER: But, I mean, Barry did murder her."
Archer (2009)
"And my possible father."
Archer (2009)
"Well, you lost me there, thankfully, but-- Give me that!"
Archer (2009)
"What, was that Peter Lawford's?"
Archer (2009)
"And point?"
Archer (2009)
"Hello?"
Archer (2009)
"I think what she-- Bawk, bawk! Therapy cranes!"
Archer (2009)
"I think what she's trying to say, is you can either think of this as a crisis--"
Archer (2009)
"By marrying her? Okay, that actually was Peter Lawford's."
Archer (2009)
"Why not? You were gonna marry her before. Before she wasn't a cyborg."
Archer (2009)
"That's my fiancée you're talking about! Really?"
Archer (2009)
"I can look past our differences, Cyril, I'm a much bigger man than you think."
Archer (2009)
"Really? Yes, really..."
Archer (2009)
"...and, Krieger! Today?"
Archer (2009)
"Katya? Baby?"
Archer (2009)
"I can actually marry y'all right here. MALORY: Oh, for God's sake! Get it over with!"
Archer (2009)
"Go to the liquor store and buy a case-- Three cases of champagne."
Archer (2009)
"...run! We're having a wedding in a few short minutes!"
Archer (2009)
"Plus it vibrates."
Archer (2009)
"Okay! Ugh. Red wine, ass."
Archer (2009)
"Yes! Right here! ARCHER: Mother!"
Archer (2009)
"Inappropriate. Alrighty."
Archer (2009)
"KATYA: You mudak!"
Archer (2009)
"Whoa, you kiss your motherboard with that mouth?"
Archer (2009)
"And also, is anybody gonna ask how and why I knew to show up here'?"
Archer (2009)
"...which Dr. Dipshit over there bought from the KGB."
Archer (2009)
"Ugh. Why do I always forget you're-- Ow!"
Archer (2009)
"Then we do the dance."
Archer (2009)
"Katya! Jesus, somebody, a little help!"
Archer (2009)
"It's pound! That is pound!"
Archer (2009)
"Pound six, pound five two!"
Archer (2009)
"Without exposure to a light-source, they'll slowly lose power."
Archer (2009)
"Barry! CHERYL: Polo!"
Archer (2009)
"CHERYL : Polo."
Archer (2009)
"Beset on all sides by idiots."
Archer (2009)
"No, just hurt really, really badly."
Archer (2009)
"BRETT: Phrasing, boom. MALORY: Brett!"
Archer (2009)
"Whoo! Yeah! Darling, I can explain!"
Archer (2009)
"Ray, turn the lights on! KRIEGER: Archer, no! The photovoltaics!"
Archer (2009)
"Why do I always forget that?"
Archer (2009)
"Called it! CYRIL: Ha, ha."
Archer (2009)
"BARRY: Bone dancing. Shut up!"
Archer (2009)
"So I won't ask you to forgive me..."
Archer (2009)
"...but could you at least be happy for me? Because I have finally found a soul mate."
Archer (2009)
"No!"
Archer (2009)
"Or, whatever..."
Archer (2009)
"...I guess. Yes."
Archer (2009)
"Well, Mother, go ahead and say it."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, Sterling, you've just had your heart broken."
Archer (2009)
"And smug it would be, because tell you I most certainly did."
Archer (2009)
"So I know that sucked-- Vacuum cleaner puns?"
Archer (2009)
"Now, really?"
Archer (2009)
"No idea, thankfully, about any of that, but if you really did love Katya..."
Archer (2009)
"I mean hula girls, a replica volcano, some-- I have something better!"
Archer (2009)
"That I like. The non-Midnight Cowboy kind."
Archer (2009)
"No, no! I had Korean barbecue for lunch, I cannot look at a Dr. Moreau pig-baby."
Archer (2009)
"Don't be nervous, I'm not gonna rape you."
Archer (2009)
"What? No, that's a wetsuit!"
Archer (2009)
"Of human flesh? Neoprene."
Archer (2009)
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