Loading...
You're not connected to the Internet. Please check your connection.

Clips from Seinfeld - The Bookstore (S09E09)

"I still have the ringing in the ears. Sounds like the phone."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, yeah, but what about money?"
Seinfeld
"Are you strapped? Do you need a little?"
Seinfeld
"Are you kidding? I should be loaning you money."
Seinfeld
"But I'm not."
Seinfeld
"Why didn't you say hello?"
Seinfeld
"Because you were too busy stealing a book."
Seinfeld
"Oh, they don't care. We all do it."
Seinfeld
"Who, criminals?"
Seinfeld
"Senior citizens. No big deal."
Seinfeld
"-You could get arrested. -Arrested? Come on."
Seinfeld
"I'm an old man. I'm confused. I thought I paid for it."
Seinfeld
"Of course, Zach and l have been dating."
Seinfeld
"What did you think? I was the office skank?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, man."
Seinfeld
"-lsn't that Zach? -Yeah."
Seinfeld
"...out of possibly dozens who applied."
Seinfeld
"Now, what we're looking for are motivated..."
Seinfeld
"The government."
Seinfeld
"You're also gonna need a well-toned upper body..."
Seinfeld
"All right, now. Take it down to the end of the block."
Seinfeld
"-Okay, ready and go. -Giddap."
Seinfeld
"Good form."
Seinfeld
"Pace yourself. You're gonna have to do this all day for very little money."
Seinfeld
"-Hey, what's he doing? -I think he's stealing our rickshaw."
Seinfeld
"I'll take the job. Potato salad."
Seinfeld
"Yes, I need to return this book."
Seinfeld
"I'm sorry, we can't take this book back."
Seinfeld
"-Why not? -It's been flagged."
Seinfeld
"-Flagged? -It's been in the bathroom."
Seinfeld
"Well, you just lost a lot of business because I love to read."
Seinfeld
"I don't believe this."
Seinfeld
"I wonder if you could do me a favor."
Seinfeld
"Where's your uncle?"
Seinfeld
"If you could just kind of put a scare into him. Set him straight."
Seinfeld
"We have a 51 50 in paperbacks. All units respond."
Seinfeld
"Roger. Ten-four."
Seinfeld
"51 50. That's just a scare, right?"
Seinfeld
"Jerry, you ratted me out."
Seinfeld
"Hello?"
Seinfeld
"Hello."
Seinfeld
"I just wanted the guard to scare him straight."
Seinfeld
"Jerry, he won't last a day in prison."
Seinfeld
"He's got priors."
Seinfeld
"Prior convictions? Leo?"
Seinfeld
"You're stealing too? What are you stealing?"
Seinfeld
"Batteries. Well, they wear out so quick."
Seinfeld
"Mom, you too?"
Seinfeld
"All right, I'll talk to you later."
Seinfeld
"...within the first three months."
Seinfeld
"I'll hit the soup kitchens, bakeries and smorgasbords."
Seinfeld
"So even though you're not really going out with this guy, he's..."
Seinfeld
"But here's the beauty part."
Seinfeld
"Now, I stand up for myself by telling everybody I'm dumping his sorry ass..."
Seinfeld
"...and I'm the office...."
Seinfeld
"-Tina Turner? -All right."
Seinfeld
"Well, I've been to every Brentano's."
Seinfeld
"Is it so horrible to have to keep a book?"
Seinfeld
"I don't understand what the big deal is."
Seinfeld
"-Hey, that's your Uncle Leo. -Uncle Leo. Hello."
Seinfeld
"I'm sorry. I didn't know about your past."
Seinfeld
"You mean my crime of passion?"
Seinfeld
"Anyone betrays me, I never forget."
Seinfeld
"French lmpressionism. Oh, I love this."
Seinfeld
"-Nothing. -How much you want for it?"
Seinfeld
"You know, I could let it go for say a hundred and twenty-five."
Seinfeld
"Jerry. Simmer down."
Seinfeld
"I'm not eating anything in the vicinity of that book."
Seinfeld
"-...at Brentano's-- -All right. Everyone clear."
Seinfeld
"May I ask..."
Seinfeld
"...what do you read in the bathroom?"
Seinfeld
"Elaine, do you have a moment?"
Seinfeld
"It's about your lover."
Seinfeld
"Elaine. Who among us hasn't snuck into the break room..."
Seinfeld
"...to nibble on a love newton?"
Seinfeld
"He's back on the horse, Elaine."
Seinfeld
"Smack. White palace."
Seinfeld
"I'm the one who sent him to Thailand in search of low-cost whistles..."
Seinfeld
"Plus, I gave him phone numbers of places..."
Seinfeld
"...the fact is, is that I was planning on breaking up with Zach anyway."
Seinfeld
"He was cheating on me."
Seinfeld
"Damn it, Elaine, that wasn't Zach."
Seinfeld
"-Oh, what, you know, I had planned-- -No buts, Elaine..."
Seinfeld
"...or I will strip you of your associate status."
Seinfeld
"It was a crime of passion."
Seinfeld
"If anyone betrays me, I never forget it."
Seinfeld
"Answer the damn phone."
Seinfeld
"Nightmares. You?"
Seinfeld
"My fake boyfriend is going through real withdrawals."
Seinfeld
"-I'm burning up. -Eat your soup."
Seinfeld
"-You're not feeding him, are you? -Why?"
Seinfeld
"I told you, away from the curtains. Away."
Seinfeld
"There you go, that's it. Okay, you know what? I gotta go."
Seinfeld
"Hey, buddy."
Seinfeld
"-Kramer. -Thought I heard you."
Seinfeld
"-Get out of here. -Kramer. Kramer. There you are."
Seinfeld
"Will everybody please leave."
Seinfeld
"I just heard a postman spotted a rickshaw down in Battery Park."
Seinfeld
"-Our rickshaw? -It's possible."
Seinfeld
"I want everyone out."
Seinfeld
"Hey, let's talk in Jerry's kitchen. I'll make some cocoa."
Seinfeld
"-There it is. -Rusty."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, yeah, we'll get back to you."
Seinfeld
"Let's get this baby home."
Seinfeld
"-What? -You know, when you think about it..."
Seinfeld
"I mean, after all, it is a conveyance."
Seinfeld
"So which one of us is gonna pull?"
Seinfeld
"Well, there's only way to settle this."
Seinfeld
"One spot, two spot, zigzag, tear, pop-dye, penny got, tennyum, tear..."
Seinfeld
"...harum-scarum, rip them, tear them, te, ta, toe."
Seinfeld
"Best two out of three. One spot, two spot...."
Seinfeld
"It's DeMornay. Rebecca DeMornay."
Seinfeld
"Oh, wait a second."
Seinfeld
"It's been flagged. I know. I used to work in a Brentano's."
Seinfeld
"Mister, we're trying to help the homeless here. It's bad enough..."
Seinfeld
"All right. I'll just take 50. Do we have a deal?"
Seinfeld
"You get your toilet book out of here and I won't jump over this counter..."
Seinfeld
"So this book will tell me how to get puke out of cashmere?"
Seinfeld
"-Yeah. -Great."
Seinfeld
"-So the worst is over? -Yeah."
Seinfeld
Show more clips