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Clips from The Good Place - Pilot (S01E01)

"Soul mate,"
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"Should we say it at the same time?"
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"All right. One, two, three."
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"We must help Michael."
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"Oh, you sly devil."
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"You're going to keep me on my toes, aren't you?"
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"All right, come on. Let's go."
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"- Oh. - Ooh."
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"Hey, Gunnar! Hey, Antonio!"
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"Hey, Eleanor."
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"When I thought of the afterlife,"
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"I totally pictured"
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"being an unpaid, non-flying janitor."
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"Us too!"
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"You guys are so fun."
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"Just relentlessly fun."
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"I keep thinking, When are they gonna stop being fun?"
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"And the answer is never."
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"You're never gonna stop."
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"Well, I have had a pretty full day"
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"of being unselfish."
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"I've made some new friends."
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"My area's almost garbage-free."
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"So you're gonna help me figure out"
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"Well, that is a really tough question."
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"Most great philosophers would say"
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"that you can't try to be good,"
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"Yeah, but what do most great philosophers know?"
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"On the other hand, Aristotle"
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"thought that moral virtue is something"
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"that you could get better at."
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"He... he compared it to playing the flute."
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"Aristotle! That's my boy, right there."
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"He was the best."
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"So it sounds to me like you are on board"
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"the help Eleanor train."
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"yes and no."
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"Well, no worries."
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"Just hit me up when you're done"
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"weighing my life in your hands."
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"being super considerate"
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"and selfless."
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"We switched to a rotating system"
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"for choosing a designated driver,"
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"and it's your turn."
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"Got it."
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"Full disclosure,"
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"I forgot we were doing this new system."
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"I got off work early."
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"I've been here for about an hour,"
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"and I'm already pretty drunk."
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"Someone else will do it."
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"Good call."
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"Guess the only place I'll be driving"
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"is through the giant loophole"
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"Whoo!"
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"Whoa!"
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"I can't believe they've managed to mix"
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"one million flavors together,"
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"It's remarkable."
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"I got no-flavor."
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"- It's all I deserve, really. - No."
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"I really do, but you don't understand."
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"This was the very first neighborhood"
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"that I got to design."
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"It was my chance to prove myself,"
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"You know, sometimes a flaw can make something"
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"even more beautiful,"
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"like with Cindy Crawford and how short she is."
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"if I made one tiny mistake in my design,"
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"if there's a single glitch in the system,"
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"if even one blade of grass"
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"The whole neighborhood is compromised."
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"Guys, whose dog is that?"
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"Whose dog is that?"
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"See, this is one of those glitches I was talking about."
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"Nice try, puppy!"
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"Whew!"
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"That was a close one."
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"Teacup?"
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"Hey, have you seen my dog?"
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"Five more minutes!"
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"Oh, man, really?"
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"Janet, I'm finished with cleanup,"
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"and I'm ready to fly."
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"- How do I start? - Hop on the launch pad"
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"and conjure an image that brings you pure joy."
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"Some people think of their wedding day"
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"or favorite vacation spot."
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"People puking on roller coasters."
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"People puking on roller coasters."
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"It's working!"
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"Janet, any chance this is a scheduled trash storm?"
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"So here's the situation, Pevita."
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"I kind of kicked your dog into the sun."
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"But I got her back."
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"Everything..."
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"everything seems fine."
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"Teacup, thank goodness you're okay."
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"Everyone, it is merely a construct of a dog."
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"It feels no pain or joy or love."
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"Teacup doesn't love me?"
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"Oh!"
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"Oh, no, no, no, no, no, it definitely feels love."
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"Do you actually want a dog that loves you a little bit more?"
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"Because I can kick her right back into the sun"
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"and get you another one just like that."
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"- No! - Oh, boy."
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"I'm making things worse."
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"Breathe. Breathe... do you breathe?"
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"- Mm-hmm. - If you do, then just breathe"
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"'cause everything's fine, Michael, it's fine."
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"Ooh, ooh, no, no, no, I'm gonna run this way."
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"Chidi! Hey."
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"- What did you do? - Nothing!"
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"It just started raining trash"
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"out of nowhere for no reason at all."
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"My bag broke, and I ditched the trash"
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"instead of taking it all the way to the dumpster."
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"But in my defense,"
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