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Clips from The Big Bang Theory - The Pirate Solution (S03E03)

"Why doesn't he just get another job?"
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"What are you asking me for? I don't know if you can talk now or not."
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"Oh, beef."
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"I'm gonna miss you so much."
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"Did you know at the Mumbai McDonald's, you can't get a Big Mac?"
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"All you can get is a Chicken Maharaja Mac."
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"And the special sauce?"
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"Curry. Which in India, believe you me, is really not that special."
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"- Don't worry. You'll find another job. - Yeah, let me start practicing for it."
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""Do you want fries with that Maharaja Mac?""
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"Hi, Leonard. Hello, Raj."
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"Forgive me. I'm not adept at reading facial cues."
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"But I'm going to take a stab here. You're either sad or nauseated."
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"- I'm sad. - I was going to say sad."
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"I don't know why I hedged."
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"What are you eating?"
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"Elbow macaroni with ground hamburger and tomato sauce."
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"Oh, beefaroni."
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"I've always been a little confused about this. Why don't Hindus eat beef?"
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"- We believe cows are gods. - Not technically."
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"In Hinduism, cattle are thought to be like God."
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"I'm sorry."
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"Me too. I'm just... I'm a little on edge."
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"...and your future appears bleak at best."
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"Thank you."
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"And you're wrong about Hinduism and cows."
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"Hey, Raj, Professor Laughlin is looking for someone to join..."
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"- Call him and set up an interview. - I'm on it."
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"- That's happy, right? - Yeah."
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"Nailed it."
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"Dr. Koothrappali, come on in."
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"I was surprised to hear you're interested in joining our team."
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"No, no. It's a very promising area."
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"...on your tremendously exciting and not yet conclusively disproved hypothesis."
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"Can I offer you a sherry?"
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"It's a little early, isn't it?"
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"Not on Proxima Centauri. Ha, ha."
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"Oh, that's very good."
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"Jolly amusing. But if you don't mind, I'll hold off until sunset on Titan."
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"Ha, ha. Well done. I have a feeling you're going to fit in fine, Dr. Koothrappali."
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"Thank you, sir."
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"I'm sorry. Am I late?"
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"No, no. Right on time."
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"Dr. Koothrappali, may I present Dr. Millstone from MIT."
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"She'll be heading up our data analysis team."
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"It's nice to meet you, Dr. Koothrappali."
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"I read your paper on Kuiper Belt object-size distribution."
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"I really enjoyed it."
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"How did you correct for the selection bias?"
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"Well, I ran a simulation."
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"Allowed me to correct for the observational efficiency."
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"- Oh. That's just fascinating. - Thank you."
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"Would you like to hear more about it at my hot tub?"
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"So when do I start?"
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"You didn't get the job? How could you not get it?"
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"You know, he's British, I'm Indian."
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"Ever since Gandhi, they haven't liked us very much."
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"Are you saying that he discriminated against you? We should file a complaint."
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"That's okay. Complaint's been filed."
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"So that's it."
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"That was my last hope."
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"Exposed to the sardonic barbs of my cousin Sanjay."
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"Or as you may know him, Dave from AT&T Customer Service."
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"- I'm really gonna miss you. - Will you come visit me in India?"
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"Gee, that's like a 17-hour flight."
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"Halfway is 600 miles off the coast of Japan."
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"- Gentlemen. - Hey."
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"Raj, did you get the job with Professor Laughlin?"
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"- No. - I assumed as much, but never fear."
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"Like the subordinate male protagonist in action movies who disappears..."
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"...halfway through the second reel, I have returned to save the day."
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"Odd. Usually he's met by cheers."
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"Anyway, I was thinking about exploring the string theory implications..."
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"...of gamma rays from dark-matter annihilations."
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"- It occurred to me that I could... - Excuse me."
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"How many reels before the subordinate male protagonist gets to his point?"
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"Anyway, I got some extra money from the head of the department..."
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"...and Raj can come work for me."
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"You want me to work with you?"
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"For me."
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"You're going to have to listen more carefully when you're on the job."
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"Okay. Please don't take this the wrong way..."
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"...but I'd rather swim buck naked across the Ganges..."
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"...with a paper cut on my nipple..."
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"...and die a slow, agonizing death from a viral infection..."
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"For me."
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"Sheldon, are you busy?"
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"Of course I'm busy."
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"- Shall I wait? - Yes, please."
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"How may I help you?"
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"I've reconsidered your offer to let me work with you."
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"Yes, for you."
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"I do, however, have a few conditions."
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"Second, my contributions shall be noted in published materials."
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"I'm impressed, Raj."
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"Those are very cogent and reasonable conditions."
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"- Thank you. - I reject them all."
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"Then you leave me no choice."
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"I accept the job."
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"I'm sorry. I believe you've misunderstood."
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"I'm not giving you the job."
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"I'm simply affording you the opportunity to apply for it."
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"Have a seat. We'll get started with the interview."
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"You're kidding."
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"Please."
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"All right."
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"That's what you wear to an interview?"
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"Come on, we've been friends for years."
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"Oh, pulling strings, are we?"
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"Sheldon, for God's sakes, don't make me beg."
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"You've fallen victim to another one of my classic practical jokes."
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"I'm your boss now. You may wanna laugh at that."
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"Ah. This is nice, having the place to ourselves, isn't it?"
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"Uh-huh."
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"Now that Raj is working for Sheldon, I don't have to chauffeur him around."
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"Plus, yeah, with them working late so much, we get some privacy."
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"Hey."
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"Wanna get a little crazy?"
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"What are you thinking?"
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"Let's slide over to Sheldon's spot and make out."
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