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Clips from How I Met Your Mother - Something Old (S08E08)

"Didn't you shoplift these in your 20s?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Yes, and I get very nostalgic for that time."
How I Met Your Mother
"Lily, we just don't have room for these."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, but you get to keep your Bigfoot binders?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Wait. Why is this one just December 1999?"
How I Met Your Mother
"A lot of people took to the woods..."
How I Met Your Mother
"saw the truth."
How I Met Your Mother
"Okay, I agree he is good at this stuff, but he just gets so cocky."
How I Met Your Mother
"No, he doesn't."
How I Met Your Mother
"I acknowledge now this was a mistake."
How I Met Your Mother
"Look. I came here to chew bubble gum and pack boxes..."
How I Met Your Mother
"I swallowed it."
How I Met Your Mother
"Is that bad?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Good. Thank you."
How I Met Your Mother
"Dr. Goldsmith says I should be fine."
How I Met Your Mother
"I heard you guys have a bit of a... packing situation."
How I Met Your Mother
"Now, as you know..."
How I Met Your Mother
"I'm a bit of a legend when it comes to packing."
How I Met Your Mother
"It's not a hands-free belt satchel, Ted."
How I Met Your Mother
"It's not a fanny pack!"
How I Met Your Mother
"Ted, in Spanish..."
How I Met Your Mother
"No, it doesn't. It means..."
How I Met Your Mother
""Packer of Great Skill and Merit.""
How I Met Your Mother
"[Ted Narrating] I looked it up. It means "Fanny Pack Dork.""
How I Met Your Mother
"And as a packer of great skill and merit..."
How I Met Your Mother
"I will tell you how to pack with Tetris-like precision."
How I Met Your Mother
"Obvious, yet delightful."
How I Met Your Mother
"about possibly designing another building."
How I Met Your Mother
"I will tell you what goes to Italy..."
How I Met Your Mother
"which possessed the magical ability to make any item disappear..."
How I Met Your Mother
"The biggest rule for de-cluttering is..."
How I Met Your Mother
""Have you used it in the last year?""
How I Met Your Mother
"Have you used this jump rope in the last year?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Well played, Mosby."
How I Met Your Mother
"Have you used it in the last year?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Gee, I can't remember."
How I Met Your Mother
"Are you trying to bribe me?"
How I Met Your Mother
"But there's something nice about finally having... a son."
How I Met Your Mother
"A s..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Cristalli twins, 9:00."
How I Met Your Mother
"- [Laser Sound Effects] - [Barney Chortles]"
How I Met Your Mother
"- Now make like your mommy's ovum and split. - [Laughs]"
How I Met Your Mother
"- [Together] Woof, woof! - [Laser Sound Effect]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Let's Go Italy? Triangle."
How I Met Your Mother
"Triangle. Let's go Italy."
How I Met Your Mother
"A gorilla suit and a blonde wig."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Grunting]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Okay. Here's an easy one."
How I Met Your Mother
"A leaky, 10-year-old beanbag chair..."
How I Met Your Mother
"covered in beer, bong water and fossilized Cool Ranch Dorito fingerprints."
How I Met Your Mother
"Italy."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Speaking Italian]"
How I Met Your Mother
"You gotta take it with you. Italy."
How I Met Your Mother
"Ted, Italy doesn't need something that is wrinkled, red and leaky..."
How I Met Your Mother
"and smells like booze and narcotics."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Laughs] I don't know who that is."
How I Met Your Mother
"Okay, why are things that we like getting Triangled..."
How I Met Your Mother
"and crap you like sneaks through?"
How I Met Your Mother
"- Like what? - That old 50-pound karaoke machine."
How I Met Your Mother
"We were Destiny's Child."
How I Met Your Mother
"Uh, we were not your backup singers, bitch. We were a group."
How I Met Your Mother
"I'm sorry. Are you guys married to Jay-Z, or am I married to Jay-Z?"
How I Met Your Mother
"- [Gasps] - [Grunts]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Wow. The way you used that kid having an asthma attack as a human shield..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Are you suggesting that I will not be point guy?"
How I Met Your Mother
"you don't let Scottie Pippen run the offense."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, you're from Canada. Right."
How I Met Your Mother
"you don't let, uh, François..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh! You are the most stubborn human being I've ever met!"
How I Met Your Mother
"Your daughter is not even a fraction..."
How I Met Your Mother
"I peed 20 minutes ago, and I buried it neatly because I am a lady."
How I Met Your Mother
"Ted, we haven't used this chair in the last year."
How I Met Your Mother
"Yeah, I guess I see your point. I mean, if you haven't used it in the last year."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh! Ha-ha! Using it. Italy."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Triangle. - Italy."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Italy. - Okay, stop."
How I Met Your Mother
"Every time he lands, that chair farts out 10-year-old Dorito dust."
How I Met Your Mother
"Yeah, it's the chair."
How I Met Your Mother
"It'll feel like home."
How I Met Your Mother
"All right, buddy. You win."
How I Met Your Mother
"We asked you to be the judge here, and we gotta trust your opinion."
How I Met Your Mother
"She's right. With all the traveling that we'll be doing..."
How I Met Your Mother
"but they actually sound useful."
How I Met Your Mother
"Could you buy us a couple?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Two hands-free belt satchels coming right up."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, and don't worry. I'll get cool colors..."
How I Met Your Mother
"♪ ♪ [Guitar Strums]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Men, it's us... versus them."
How I Met Your Mother
"will echo through eternity."
How I Met Your Mother
"For every three 10s you bang, throw a bone to a five."
How I Met Your Mother
"They're grateful and hardworking..."
How I Met Your Mother
"and let's face it, sometimes you just want to lay there."
How I Met Your Mother
"What's that got to do with laser tag?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Tanner."
How I Met Your Mother
"but I want the big man for myself."
How I Met Your Mother
"He's... my father."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Father-in-law. - Shut up, Kai."
How I Met Your Mother
"Wait a second."
How I Met Your Mother
"We get it. You pack a lot in your fanny."
How I Met Your Mother
"No!"
How I Met Your Mother
"[Together] El Gansol"
How I Met Your Mother
"Liars! You sent me on a fool's errand."
How I Met Your Mother
"Okay, to be fair, buying a fanny pack is inherently a fool's errand."
How I Met Your Mother
"Hands-free belt satchels."
How I Met Your Mother
"And just for that, I will not move from this chair until you agree to keep it."
How I Met Your Mother
"You have a job interview in half an hour."
How I Met Your Mother
"this... is a raincoat."
How I Met Your Mother
"- [Rings] - Go for Barney."
How I Met Your Mother
"Nah, it's stupid. Have fun."
How I Met Your Mother
"So long, losers! [Cackles]"
How I Met Your Mother
"why don't you just take it for yourself?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Why?"
How I Met Your Mother
"And now you two are moving to Italy."
How I Met Your Mother
"If you can throw out this chair..."
How I Met Your Mother
"who's to say you can't throw me out too?"
How I Met Your Mother
"You can say that, but a lot can change in a year."
How I Met Your Mother
"I just..."
How I Met Your Mother
"I just need a moment with this chair."
How I Met Your Mother
"You know, to say good-bye."
How I Met Your Mother
"We'll give you two some space."
How I Met Your Mother
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