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Clips from Silicon Valley - Meinertzhagen's Haversack (S03E03)

"One of your Pied Piper boxes"
Silicon Valley
"Richard. What the fuck are we doing here?"
Silicon Valley
"I can't believe you suggested the idea"
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"I didn't, okay?"
Silicon Valley
"I didn't want to go to enterprise."
Silicon Valley
"- No, we didn't say that. - You said it all the time."
Silicon Valley
"Would you like to see your desks?"
Silicon Valley
"There's really no difference between day and night down here,"
Silicon Valley
"so it makes things easy."
Silicon Valley
"Just whatever's as fast as possible."
Silicon Valley
"Okay."
Silicon Valley
"John!"
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"- Where is he? John! - John!"
Silicon Valley
"You said that when we got back from Maleant"
Silicon Valley
"Yes, I did. And now they teach it at business schools."
Silicon Valley
"Build me a box... now."
Silicon Valley
"How'd it go?"
Silicon Valley
"to "Looking for work.""
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"That box is artless commerce. I won't be a party to it."
Silicon Valley
"So, you're just gonna quit?"
Silicon Valley
"Hey, can I have that USB missile launcher?"
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"Give me some time to figure a way out of this,"
Silicon Valley
"This is Gilfoyle. Dazzle me."
Silicon Valley
"The more meetings I turn down, the more these recruiters send me."
Silicon Valley
"- You're leaving me with the cheddar? - That's right. Dick."
Silicon Valley
"Hey, can I borrow this? Just for a little bit?"
Silicon Valley
"You're wearing a gold chain?"
Silicon Valley
"Oh, right. Yeah, I've had it for a while."
Silicon Valley
"- I definitely would've noticed. - Okay, listen."
Silicon Valley
"You're just jealous I have a salary, quitter."
Silicon Valley
"Well, Gilfoyle, looks like your recruiters"
Silicon Valley
"But you're... you're going over your CEO's head?"
Silicon Valley
"he goes out, buys a gun, and shoots everyone in a bank."
Silicon Valley
"No. What are you talking about?"
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"and didn't invite me along..."
Silicon Valley
"I want you to want me to talk to Barker."
Silicon Valley
"You know... at this point, if it'll make you feel better,"
Silicon Valley
"See?"
Silicon Valley
"What can I do for you, Mr. Bachman?"
Silicon Valley
"with some freeform jazz odyssey of masturbatory bullshit,"
Silicon Valley
"Richard."
Silicon Valley
"Two, you get Laurie Bream on the phone ASAP."
Silicon Valley
"Okay."
Silicon Valley
"harvested, apparently, from dead people in India."
Silicon Valley
"It's a pun. It signifies that"
Silicon Valley
"Well, I concur with your assessment"
Silicon Valley
"And it goes without saying, I was never here."
Silicon Valley
"I can't see 'cause of these fucking monitors."
Silicon Valley
"How pissed? Scale of one to 10."
Silicon Valley
"- Oh my God. Seven. - Fuck."
Silicon Valley
"Richard? Jack would like to see you in his office."
Silicon Valley
"I'm gonna go ask Action Jack how Laurie's dick tastes."
Silicon Valley
"Sure."
Silicon Valley
"Anyway, she wanted a comprehensive,"
Silicon Valley
"for the platform version within 48 hours."
Silicon Valley
"Wow. Well, what Laurie wants, Laurie gets."
Silicon Valley
"Yes, she said that, and then I said"
Silicon Valley
"Look at us. Two rogues on the King's Highway."
Silicon Valley
"- Bertram Gilfoyle? - Yeah."
Silicon Valley
"They told me not to give it to you until after the meeting."
Silicon Valley
"Exactly. She can't fire him because she fired you."
Silicon Valley
"do you really think I'd be looking"
Silicon Valley
"- Gilfoyle. - What the fuck?"
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"Oh. No. We want you"
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"- Bullshit. - Do you know Naveen and Eric,"
Silicon Valley
"who, until very recently, headed up engineering at Nucleus?"
Silicon Valley
"- Hey, man. - What's up?"
Silicon Valley
"the code they brought us."
Silicon Valley
"That's exactly how they had it."
Silicon Valley
"and Endframe stole the other half."
Silicon Valley
"And now they've knitted them together."
Silicon Valley
"You're making it worse. Sorry, Django."
Silicon Valley
"Look, how are we going to save the platform?"
Silicon Valley
"Or do we?"
Silicon Valley
"I don't know. I don't want to lie down for this, okay?"
Silicon Valley
"I don't want to just give up so easily."
Silicon Valley
"Tommy Jefferson, Benny Franklin,"
Silicon Valley
"He said, "Avast, ye fellow badasses,"
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"all we need to do is..."
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"is building the platform. Think about it."
Silicon Valley
"What's he gonna do?"
Silicon Valley
"than to embrace it and say it was his idea all along,"
Silicon Valley
"because at that point, he can't tell Laurie the truth."
Silicon Valley
"And Laurie wants the platform, anyway, so..."
Silicon Valley
"It's a 2001 casino heist film,"
Silicon Valley
"he could take our stock and probably have us arrested."
Silicon Valley
"And not in the membrane."
Silicon Valley
"all the way to the building's main power panel."
Silicon Valley
"Here's the deal. I'm going to need the back pay you guys owe me"
Silicon Valley
"into being friends with that Monica chick."
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"In? No."
Silicon Valley
"We've thought of everything. We have a plan."
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"We're not gonna make the same mistakes..."
Silicon Valley
"I'm going to need everyone to solemnly swear,"
Silicon Valley
"Wait."
Silicon Valley
"Essentially, it means you have to continue to act the part."
Silicon Valley
"That's exactly right."
Silicon Valley
"We have to. We don't have any other choice, Dinesh."
Silicon Valley
"of anything that we've done here, we are fucked."
Silicon Valley
"Not for myself, obviously, but for the team."
Silicon Valley
"Yeah. Great."
Silicon Valley
"Skunkworks?"
Silicon Valley
"Richard, why did you bring"
Silicon Valley
"You were supposed to shred those."
Silicon Valley
"Yes, but I was gonna shred them here,"
Silicon Valley
"My office. Now."
Silicon Valley
"Here it is."
Silicon Valley
"would go right here in this rack."
Silicon Valley
"Okay."
Silicon Valley
"Let me show you the next location"
Silicon Valley
"in which we would install one of your boxes."
Silicon Valley
"I told Jack we'd come check this place out"
Silicon Valley
"and then we'd have a discussion."
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"of building a fucking appliance."
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"I pitched it as an example of what not to do"
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"and the fucking sales guys ran with it."
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"You were the ones who said it would be fine."
Silicon Valley
"That's not what we said. That is not..."
Silicon Valley
"of your Pied Piper boxes would go."
Silicon Valley
"Okay. Good."
Silicon Valley
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