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Clips from Scrubs - My New Role (S08E08)

"Katie, we've been over this."
Scrubs
"Awesome! Go back and say, "J.D. Says you're welcome."
Scrubs
"And he wanted me to ask you"
Scrubs
"so they went to the person who settled all disputes"
Scrubs
"between nurses and physicians."
Scrubs
"Elliot, I bet you didn't know that on weekends,"
Scrubs
"Well, about time, Champ. Beer me."
Scrubs
"at Nurse Roberts' above-ground pool party"
Scrubs
"Look, there are a few key differences between us."
Scrubs
"For instance, I know that white leather shoes are never gonna be classy."
Scrubs
"I like to pretend that they're friendly stone people."
Scrubs
"Elliot, please. Turk just wanted me to look up a study about"
Scrubs
"Do not do him any more personal favors."
Scrubs
"What are you talking about?"
Scrubs
"It is my first official day as Chief of Medicine,"
Scrubs
"I didn't do anything."
Scrubs
"No, that's 'cause Colonel Doctor has two years sober."
Scrubs
"It is great to see someone other than Kelso behind that desk."
Scrubs
"Dr. Kelso always made me stand."
Scrubs
"Go ahead and make yourself comfortable, pal."
Scrubs
"How was your weekend, Howie?"
Scrubs
"Well, I bought some new soap, but it turns out I was allergic to it."
Scrubs
"Okay, let's start rounds over here."
Scrubs
"It was touch and go there for a while, but you're bouncing back."
Scrubs
"You're gonna be out of here any day now."
Scrubs
"We like having you around, too, sir."
Scrubs
"- What the hell is that? - Some stupid gift from the Board."
Scrubs
"I might have the date wrong. So where do you want me to hang it?"
Scrubs
"from taking patients' wallets after they died?"
Scrubs
"Doctors don't do that."
Scrubs
"Look at you, sticking with the plan."
Scrubs
"Dr. Kelso always used to sign his paperwork on my back."
Scrubs
"I imagine it's what a hug feels like."
Scrubs
"so we don't have to work forced overtime."
Scrubs
"Why is Nelly giving you so much attitude?"
Scrubs
"Even though I'm the head nurse, I mostly hang with doctors."
Scrubs
"I know. I just wanted to hear you say it out loud."
Scrubs
"How could they think that? You're, like, the most loyal person I know."
Scrubs
"Look, most nurses feel under-appreciated,"
Scrubs
"You know what I'd like to go in and out of?"
Scrubs
"Disrespecting nurses five!"
Scrubs
"You know what? I've got pull with Dr. Cox. Let me handle this."
Scrubs
"You're late."
Scrubs
"Not five seconds in the door,"
Scrubs
"and it's already number three on Mr. Vaughn's greatest hits!"
Scrubs
"You know, why stop there, Frank?"
Scrubs
"Coming in at number two, "You never introduce me to people at parties.""
Scrubs
"And at the top of the charts, as always, "What about my feelings?""
Scrubs
"I only say those things because I love you."
Scrubs
"Well, you've got a funny way of showing it."
Scrubs
"You know what? That might be a little weird."
Scrubs
"- What do you think? - Why?"
Scrubs
"Life is more interesting when you look at the back of things."
Scrubs
"And done. We are the hell out of here."
Scrubs
"Well, now isn't one of those times."
Scrubs
"Man!"
Scrubs
"I am not answering that."
Scrubs
"The phone won't stop ringing."
Scrubs
"I've been noticing all the recent forced overtime."
Scrubs
"Just testing out the hammer. See if it works. It does."
Scrubs
"Hey! You're not the only one who can hammer."
Scrubs
"It's okay."
Scrubs
"- Hey. - Hey."
Scrubs
"Wow!"
Scrubs
"Nice digs, Per."
Scrubs
"Look, my pneumonia patient is being discharged,"
Scrubs
"and he's not ready. If he goes home now,"
Scrubs
"I got to stay below the radar for a little while."
Scrubs
"- Is it because... - And no, we're not super cool."
Scrubs
"That I've somehow forgotten what matters."
Scrubs
"you arrogant, pretentious, self-righteous, little jackass."
Scrubs
"And you, get the hell out of my office."
Scrubs
"Well, that's fine. We will get together"
Scrubs
"Uh-oh."
Scrubs
"Oh, boy!"
Scrubs
"You know what? I'm gonna go get some putty."
Scrubs
"If you just hold this right here, I'll be done in a second."
Scrubs
"so she still hooks me up with free morning-after pills."
Scrubs
"Still got it."
Scrubs
"Why don't you go somewhere and lie down?"
Scrubs
"So, the Janitor still doing the picture thing, huh?"
Scrubs
"Well, every time he would ask me for a real office, I'd say "no.""
Scrubs
"What did they do?"
Scrubs
"Yeah, you..."
Scrubs
"Yeah."
Scrubs
"- Poppycock. - What?"
Scrubs
"You're an odd duck, aren't you?"
Scrubs
"That's what they tell me, but I don't see it."
Scrubs
"Yeah, I agree. It was stupid. I hated it."
Scrubs
"that you doctors get treated with every single day."
Scrubs
"- I do that. - You do with me."
Scrubs
"to give you Clindamycin, because it was made by someone"
Scrubs
"and not someone who turned to nursing"
Scrubs
"after a failed career as a recording artist."
Scrubs
"And don't you dare try to kick-box me."
Scrubs
"Maybe not totally respectful."
Scrubs
"When he gets a startle like the one I gave him earlier,"
Scrubs
"he usually sleeps about 18 hours."
Scrubs
"spending time with him, taking him on walks."
Scrubs
"but that's where I want the picture for the rest of the day."
Scrubs
"and, hell, he's scared."
Scrubs
"and complained about something I would automatically say "no.""
Scrubs
"I knew it was something that I'd have to take a look at."
Scrubs
"and he's got this damn voice in his head"
Scrubs
"And he desperately needs someone on the other side"
Scrubs
"to tell him what he should do, whether he wants to hear it or not."
Scrubs
"He's gonna hate you for it."
Scrubs
"Go!"
Scrubs
"What?"
Scrubs
"I was planning on waiting for you in the parking lot tonight"
Scrubs
"Carla would just swoop in and protect her doctor friend."
Scrubs
"You're just frustrated by the situation and you're taking it out on her."
Scrubs
"The point is, Carla's a nurse first."
Scrubs
"She said that out loud earlier. You can ask anyone."
Scrubs
"Anyway. You can either use her relationships with us as doctors"
Scrubs
"or claim he's allergic to his medication,"
Scrubs
"J.D.: I got about the answer I expected."
Scrubs
"I'm going to get out of this cage"
Scrubs
"J.D.: It's scary how easy it is to become resigned to your lot in life."
Scrubs
"You just go about your business, same as always."
Scrubs
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