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Clips from The Office (2005) - The Negotiation (S03E03)

"Thank you. Yeah."
The Office (2005)
"I didn't give you $40."
The Office (2005)
"Fourteen years."
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"Fourteen."
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"I know."
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"Okay, all right, I got to go. Late."
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"Okay. Okay. Here's the straight dope."
The Office (2005)
"No tricks, no Wikipedia."
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"What? I talked to corporate"
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"I can only give you a five-percent raise."
The Office (2005)
"Get your own raise."
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"You've got to get out there and earn, son."
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"I'm not going to go out and ask for a raise right now."
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"Well, when they merged the two branches together,"
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"Okay? And we're shipping more now than we ever have."
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"That's true. Yeah, that's true."
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"Show her who wears the pants in the relationship."
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"You know what, I should."
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"Yeah, you should."
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"You know what, I deserve a bump."
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"I am making it happen, Sergeant."
The Office (2005)
"Big fella comes in screaming about God knows what."
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"something like that."
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"Then Schrute grabs a can of hairspray and a lighter..."
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"I've never asked for a raise in 14 years."
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"This is long overdue. I want to do it today."
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"and can you get here by 5:00?"
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"Yeah. Yeah, I'll leave right away."
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"And listen, because of our, you know, situation,"
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"we're going to need to have a third party present."
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"Darryl from the warehouse? Mmm-hmm."
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"No, Michael, we... We need an HR rep,"
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"so I think you should just bring Toby."
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"Hey, I'd rather kill myself."
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"Michael, he's your branch's HR rep..."
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"...and we need someone else in the room..."
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"...because of our relationship. Michael!"
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"Either Toby comes with you or we don't do it."
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"Fine."
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"KELLY: You are so mean."
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"RYAN: I don't know what you're talking about."
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"Yes, you do, Ryan Bailey Howard."
The Office (2005)
"You called me stupid. No. I said..."
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"Toby, come on, let's go."
The Office (2005)
"KELLY: What is so stupid about wanting to name a baby Usher?"
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"All right."
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"RYAN: Don't you see why that's insane?"
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"Oh, so I'm crazy now?"
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"What about you, man, you comfortable?"
The Office (2005)
"Don't ever touch a black man's radio."
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"Chris Tucker, Rush Hour."
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"Big Apple."
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"Maybe I'll stay overnight."
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"I got a cousin who lives down there."
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"Maybe I'll stay."
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"And then all of a sudden Dwight stood up and was like, "No!""
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"Well, you should just read the report that Toby did."
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"He took everyone's stories."
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"Dunder Mifflin, customer service. This is Kelly."
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"Oh, yeah, I can totally help you with that."
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"Okay, it seems here that you ordered 12,000 reams of paper."
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"Hey, guys. Jan is ready for you."
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"Pippety poppety, give me the zoppety."
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"Yes, sir. Remember that."
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"I'll be right outside if you need me."
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"All right."
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"DARRYL: Yeah. I taught Mike some new phrases."
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"I want him to get the raise."
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"Hey, man..."
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"Please."
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"Jim."
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"Who is the boy toy?"
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"I have to call you the second I get a new assistant now?"
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"Hi, Jan."
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"Hi, Toby."
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"First off, Michael, this is a salary negotiation."
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"All matters regarding our personal relationship"
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"Bippety, boppety."
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"Right now, we can offer you a six-percent raise."
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"Oh, God. I got you jade earrings."
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"Michael. No."
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"No. No. Michael."
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"You're going to play it like this?"
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"You give me a good raise or no more sex."
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"What are you writing, perv-ball?"
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"to get a modest, scheduled raise"
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"by threatening to withhold sex from a female superior."
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"I'm so sorry, Pammy."
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"I mean, I wasn't going to do anything, but then..."
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"I just thought you guys were really good friends"
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"Not that that's wrong."
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"I just... I think that we both made some bad choices."
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"So, you going to start dating Halpert then?"
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"No."
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"No. He has a girlfriend."
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"Wait a minute, you broke up our wedding for the guy."
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"I don't get you, Pam."
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"I know."
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"What's what? "Certificate of Bravery"
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""recognizing outstanding citizenship from a very brave young man,"
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""Dwight K. Schrute.""
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"Wow. I guess word got around. That's a nice honor."
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"Please. They hand these out to little kids."
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"Look, there's a teddy bear in a policeman's cap."
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"This is me, Jan. This is me."
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"Okay. Michael, please."
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"You know, why don't we just take a break?"
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"Okay. This is..."
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"This is going nowhere. No. No. No."
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"You do not try tactic number eight on me."
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"I invented tactic number eight."
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"I'm not going anywhere."
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"Okay, Toby, how about if you..."
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"Sure. Great."
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"What's wrong with you?"
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"I don't know. Was a weird day."
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"I accidentally cross-dressed."
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"And then Darryl made me feel bad for not making any money."
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"And then your assistant is all young and hot and I..."
The Office (2005)
"Okay, Michael."
The Office (2005)
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