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Clips from Archer (2009) - Animation (S03E03)

"You will not. Mainly because you've got bigger things to worry about."
Archer (2009)
"I'll be the judge of... A Cuban hit squad is in New York to kill me?"
Archer (2009)
"Why are you just telling me about it now? Because."
Archer (2009)
"Pick up, Sterling. Pick up, pick..."
Archer (2009)
"Voicemail. You know what to do. Oh, for God's sake."
Archer (2009)
"Hello? Oh, man. Hold on. Sterling? Sterling, dear, it's me."
Archer (2009)
"Hold on, hold on! Hang on. Pick up, Sterling."
Archer (2009)
"I got it."
Archer (2009)
"Hello? Sterling, it's..."
Archer (2009)
"Elaborate voicemail hoax."
Archer (2009)
"And then I just forgot about it, because that same night, I met..."
Archer (2009)
"Burt Reynolds is on line one!"
Archer (2009)
"Burt, dear, what a lovely surprise."
Archer (2009)
"I'm sitting here with just a mustache and memories of last night."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, Burt. Ugh!"
Archer (2009)
"Deliverance, Gator, and this is him in Cosmo."
Archer (2009)
"How totally hot is he?!"
Archer (2009)
"I swear to God, you could drown a toddler in my panties right now."
Archer (2009)
"- Hey! - Shut up!"
Archer (2009)
"You're not my supervisor!"
Archer (2009)
"Wait, who is my supervisor?"
Archer (2009)
"Carol! Oh, right."
Archer (2009)
"Go get my gray fox out of cold storage."
Archer (2009)
"Help me, God, if you throw that computer on the floor again..."
Archer (2009)
"...you'll wake up in a mental ward with total amnesia under someone else's name!"
Archer (2009)
"That's actually kind of scary. Eh."
Archer (2009)
"Wouldn't be the first time."
Archer (2009)
"Archer, hey, about this expense report... Not now, Cyril."
Archer (2009)
"Mother is ruining what remains of my life before a Cuban hit squad assassinates me, so..."
Archer (2009)
"Yeah, laugh it up, Lana. I am."
Archer (2009)
"You almost got shot in the face."
Archer (2009)
"Get off. You get off."
Archer (2009)
"Because of the Cubans or because Burt Reynolds is doing your mom?"
Archer (2009)
"Yeah, laugh it up. I am."
Archer (2009)
"You broke my freaking nose! What's that?"
Archer (2009)
"Sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of "I broke your nose.""
Archer (2009)
"- This Cuban hit squad is no joke. If I were you, I'd lay low in the safe house..."
Archer (2009)
"...for a few days until we work out a plan to neutralize them."
Archer (2009)
"Oh. Yeah, okay. The safe house."
Archer (2009)
"I'm sorry, your words made sense, but your sarcastic tone did not."
Archer (2009)
"Because there are no Cubans. Uh..."
Archer (2009)
"Mother just wants me out of the way..."
Archer (2009)
"...so she can do unspeakable things with Burt Reynolds."
Archer (2009)
"So nice try, idiot."
Archer (2009)
"I love it that I'm the idiot."
Archer (2009)
"So unless the building is literally on fire, none of you are to call me."
Archer (2009)
"Because, as I may have mentioned... Fifty times."
Archer (2009)
"- Tonight I will be attending a movie premiere with Burt Reynolds."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, my God, that totally reminds me. This came for you. From him."
Archer (2009)
"That's how I knew it was from him. Give me that."
Archer (2009)
""Dear Malory, it's been...""
Archer (2009)
""Dear Malory, it's been real, but I'm dumping you for a young starlet..."
Archer (2009)
"...and heading back to Tinseltown."
Archer (2009)
"Do not contact me. Regards, Burt Reynolds.""
Archer (2009)
""Regards"? They weren't even warmest!"
Archer (2009)
"Wait a minute. Who calls it Tinseltown? Carol Channing?"
Archer (2009)
"Or somebody who just thinks that's what movie stars call Hollywood."
Archer (2009)
"Stockard Channing."
Archer (2009)
"Archer. His mother, dating his man-crush?"
Archer (2009)
"Archer goes to Burt's hotel room."
Archer (2009)
"Archer? Burt."
Archer (2009)
"- Knocks him out... - Archer knocks out Burt Reynolds?"
Archer (2009)
"With gas. Oh, shit."
Archer (2009)
"And then hides him somewhere, like an idiot kid hiding a lamp he broke."
Archer (2009)
"- You really think he'd do that? - Yes, really."
Archer (2009)
"I'm serious. If you ever go near my mother again..."
Archer (2009)
"...I will do something really bad."
Archer (2009)
"Then you should probably just get it over with."
Archer (2009)
"Because if you don't kill me and I get loose..."
Archer (2009)
"I don't have a response to that."
Archer (2009)
"They never do."
Archer (2009)
"They tell you they love you and then they just cast you aside..."
Archer (2009)
"Mm. I bet they were perky and big. Jeez...! Ow!"
Archer (2009)
"Why are you torturing her like that?"
Archer (2009)
"Aw. That's actually kind of sad. All right, here's the plan."
Archer (2009)
"I say we go rescue Burt Reynolds, and as a bonus..."
Archer (2009)
"...beat some sense into Archer's head and ass."
Archer (2009)
"So, Pam, Carol, stay here with Malory. Everybody else, let's go to Archer's."
Archer (2009)
"He's got a Cuban hit squad after him. Why wouldn't he go to the safe house?"
Archer (2009)
"A, because he thinks they're imaginary, and B, the safe house doesn't have a..."
Archer (2009)
"New hot tub! Fifty jets, hand-hewn California redwood, no big deal."
Archer (2009)
"The California redwood is endangered."
Archer (2009)
"So? I already got my tub."
Archer (2009)
"Woodhouse, Burt Reynolds. Burt, Woodhouse."
Archer (2009)
"Hi. Loved you in Gone with the Wind."
Archer (2009)
"Not him. Shut up, get him a drink."
Archer (2009)
"What's your poison?"
Archer (2009)
"Pimm's Cup. Odd choice."
Archer (2009)
"Well, the whole thing's pretty odd."
Archer (2009)
"Why is that odd? Because you're you, and she's..."
Archer (2009)
"Beautiful, smart, funny, successful. Mm. Like, one of those, tops."
Archer (2009)
"Not to mention drop-dead sexy. Oh, dear God, yes."
Archer (2009)
"You have to not date my mother. Can't do it."
Archer (2009)
"Then here's what's gonna happen. You'll drink your Pimm's Cup..."
Archer (2009)
"Which is exciting. Never had one. Mm-hm. Then I'm gonna knock you out."
Archer (2009)
"You'll wake up in a mental hospital with total amnesia, under someone else's name."
Archer (2009)
"Now that's an idea for a movie. Yeah, I think it already was."
Archer (2009)
"I wasn't in it. Maybe not..."
Archer (2009)
"...nurses in crisp white uniforms..."
Archer (2009)
"...broken men shuffle like zombies."
Archer (2009)
"We see a hospital wristband on a man's arm, John Doe."
Archer (2009)
"Gator McKlusky."
Archer (2009)
"And he's looking out the window, the afternoon sun on his face."
Archer (2009)
"A spark of recognition in his eyes. Know what he's looking at?"
Archer (2009)
"No. The Okefenokee Swamp."
Archer (2009)
"There's a mental hospital there?"
Archer (2009)
"An airboat! And the head nurse falls in love with him..."
Archer (2009)
"...and finds out who he really is, so she helps him escape."
Archer (2009)
"And they get chased by dirty cops, but in the end they win!"
Archer (2009)
"And you just got a screenplay credit."
Archer (2009)
"For real? Yeah, maybe even..."
Archer (2009)
"Your Pimm's Cup, sir."
Archer (2009)
"Doesn't it come in a silver chalice?"
Archer (2009)
"Oh."
Archer (2009)
"I hate to sound Hollywood, but could you put my Pimm's Cup in a...?"
Archer (2009)
"Pimp cup? Certainly."
Archer (2009)
"It would be an honor, Mr. Gable."
Archer (2009)
"Maybe even what? Executive producer."
Archer (2009)
"...falling for that, you big liar."
Archer (2009)
"You're not gonna make that movie. Oh, I absolutely am."
Archer (2009)
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