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Clips from Superstore - Mannequin (S01E01)

"I feel like you're sitting."
Superstore
"Try doing this job six months pregnant."
Superstore
"Then I gave birth to my daughter."
Superstore
"- I didn't bring up abortion. - Oh, keep tempting me."
Superstore
"Now I get why you looked familiar"
Superstore
"If that's what you see when you look at me,"
Superstore
"then maybe this is on you."
Superstore
"I guess I look like Denzel Washington."
Superstore
"Tom Cruise..."
Superstore
"but I also don't know if I'm ready to be a mom."
Superstore
"I was 19 when I had Emma."
Superstore
"Well, Glenn's the manager."
Superstore
"And if you do decide that adoption"
Superstore
"We'll keep you in mind."
Superstore
"So... The stems create a natural holding stick."
Superstore
"Huh? Oh... oh."
Superstore
"You're like the house mom of a frat."
Superstore
"Wow."
Superstore
"That's good to know."
Superstore
"Wh-why is that good to know?"
Superstore
"What do you know?"
Superstore
"It's humans that hold them wrong!"
Superstore
"Okay."
Superstore
"Ah!"
Superstore
"Oh, thank you."
Superstore
"Well, whatever you think is best."
Superstore
"You don't know the first thing about babies."
Superstore
"So funny."
Superstore
"Okay. Let me just..."
Superstore
"Um, where's Amy?"
Superstore
"- Let's link it in, G. - Yeah!"
Superstore
"Stop it! Come on!"
Superstore
"- Just need to get this into the... - what... what have you done?"
Superstore
"Yeah, just speak from the heart, yo."
Superstore
"Just admit that my fun pranks got to you,"
Superstore
"if someone did the same thing to you."
Superstore
"the whole six foot tall, blonde hair thing."
Superstore
"Mm, nice try."
Superstore
"there's nobody to let anyone in the dressing rooms,"
Superstore
"Excuse me?"
Superstore
"Everybody does it. You flirt a little bit at work."
Superstore
"He called you responsible?"
Superstore
"why you are attaching a shark"
Superstore
"to the severed leg of a mannequin."
Superstore
"I wanted to get back at Amy,"
Superstore
"that look remotely like her."
Superstore
"and then I just happened to pass this in the window"
Superstore
"Think what's best for the baby."
Superstore
"which is proof that I returned the doll."
Superstore
"Uh-huh. Wow."
Superstore
"Ew."
Superstore
"I mean, it got a little out of control, but you passed."
Superstore
"I'll, uh... I'll see you tomorrow."
Superstore
"Big daddy in the house, right here."
Superstore
"This is nice, huh?"
Superstore
"Taking a well-earned break with my coworkers."
Superstore
"I feel like I'm finally fitting in here."
Superstore
"You don't get to decide when you're fitting in."
Superstore
"We'll let you know."
Superstore
"I'm just saying... I'm getting used to it."
Superstore
"Ugh."
Superstore
"Not getting used to standing all day."
Superstore
"That's not a problem I have to deal with."
Superstore
"Yeah, well, lucky you, my friend."
Superstore
"Not luck... lucky... not lucky you."
Superstore
"That's... I don't think you're lucky."
Superstore
"So you think I'm unlucky?"
Superstore
"Not... well... you know what I mean."
Superstore
"That's an... it's an expression."
Superstore
"Why don't you just eject right now?"
Superstore
"You know, it's so weird that your feet hurt,"
Superstore
"because every time I see you,"
Superstore
"Yeah, seriously. That's brutal."
Superstore
"I didn't know you were pregnant too."
Superstore
"I was when I was 19."
Superstore
"So I'm not pregnant now, but thank you for thinking so."
Superstore
"I didn't mean you look pregnant."
Superstore
"- I just meant... - Eject. Eject!"
Superstore
"I didn't know that you had a child."
Superstore
"I... listen... that's... I think that's beautiful."
Superstore
"Really, I'm in awe of single mothers, so..."
Superstore
"I'm married."
Superstore
"Ooh!"
Superstore
"You should've just ejected, man."
Superstore
"Why are you in awe of single mothers?"
Superstore
"I just think it's... it's very brave to have a child,"
Superstore
"especially at your age."
Superstore
"Well, I didn't set out to have a baby."
Superstore
"Came from sex."
Superstore
"Right. Sure."
Superstore
"Uh, but you... you bravely"
Superstore
"made the decision to go through with it."
Superstore
"Well, I couldn't get a ride to planned parenthood."
Superstore
"Jonah, I'd prefer"
Superstore
"if you didn't offer to shuttle our employees"
Superstore
"to the abortion clinic."
Superstore
"No, I meant rides in general."
Superstore
"What if it was just for a pap smear?"
Superstore
"Could I get a ride for that?"
Superstore
"They recommend one a year, but I like to go extra."
Superstore
"Make sure everything's up to code."
Superstore
"Okay. I'm just gonna say it."
Superstore
"I'm fine with you driving your coworkers"
Superstore
"anywhere except the abortion clinic."
Superstore
"Damn it, Glenn, you cannot talk about"
Superstore
"- He did! - You are begging me to..."
Superstore
"- I am allowed to say the word. - I will write you up so hard!"
Superstore
"Abortion! Abortion!"
Superstore
"I'm recording this entire conversation."
Superstore
"Abortion, abortion, abortion, abortion!"
Superstore
"I mean, it's kind of unbelievable, right?"
Superstore
"They're definitely pretty similar."
Superstore
"Uh, I don't see it."
Superstore
"when you started working here."
Superstore
"At first, I thought you were"
Superstore
"this white dude from my middle school"
Superstore
"who wore his pants backwards"
Superstore
"like kris kross, but nah, you him."
Superstore
"I... I mean,"
Superstore
"it's a mannequin of a Caucasian male."
Superstore
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