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Clips from Modern Family (2009) - Boys' Night (S02E02)

"and another flock of birds fell out of the sky."
Modern Family (2009)
"Sweetie, you gotta stop watching the news."
Modern Family (2009)
"That's your big solution? Embrace ignorance?"
Modern Family (2009)
"What are you two arguing about? Never mind. I don't wanna know."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Oh. - Be back in a couple hours."
Modern Family (2009)
"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where are you going?"
Modern Family (2009)
"To my friend Walt's house to watch High Noon."
Modern Family (2009)
"Ooh, I love westerns. The bloodier the better."
Modern Family (2009)
"That's my favorite type of movie."
Modern Family (2009)
"That and anything set against the backdrop of competitive cheerleading."
Modern Family (2009)
"Is Walt the one who's always skateboarding?"
Modern Family (2009)
"No. Where would he put his oxygen tank?"
Modern Family (2009)
"Okay. Now I'm really confused."
Modern Family (2009)
"You sound like Walt. He gets confused a lot. It's hilarious."
Modern Family (2009)
"Yeah. I went over to his house to get my ball, and we've been hanging out."
Modern Family (2009)
"You were in Mr. Kleezak's house?"
Modern Family (2009)
"- Luke, that is not okay. - Why not?"
Modern Family (2009)
"He's really nice. And funny."
Modern Family (2009)
"Listen to this joke. Okay. Two crabs walk into a bar..."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Phil, this is not good. - Honey, don't jump to conclusions."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Let him finish the joke. - And one of them has a limp."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Uh-huh. - You may not go back to that man's house."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Why not? - Because he's weird."
Modern Family (2009)
"- And not very nice. - Yeah."
Modern Family (2009)
"The Oliver who almost burned down our garage?"
Modern Family (2009)
"He likes to melt stuff! Like you're so perfect."
Modern Family (2009)
"Luke, I'm sorry, but your mother and I just aren't comfortable with this."
Modern Family (2009)
"That's so unfair! You don't even know him 'cause you're too afraid to talk to him."
Modern Family (2009)
"Buddy, we're just looking out for you."
Modern Family (2009)
"- We're doing the right thing. - Absolutely."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Aren't we? - I don't know."
Modern Family (2009)
"And little kids can be friends with old people, right?"
Modern Family (2009)
"Of course they can. There's tons of examples."
Modern Family (2009)
"Up, um, Gran Torino, True Grit."
Modern Family (2009)
"Cartoon, kills himself, she loses an arm."
Modern Family (2009)
"- We've gotta go talk to that guy. - Now?"
Modern Family (2009)
"- Yeah. - It's so dark."
Modern Family (2009)
"Okay. So the numbers are by the phone."
Modern Family (2009)
"There's food in the fridge. I just changed her diaper."
Modern Family (2009)
"So all you need to do is put her down in about half hour..."
Modern Family (2009)
"and not let a serial killer in the front door."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Well, what if he's cute? - Well, then save him for us."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Nobody in, nobody out. - No."
Modern Family (2009)
"Oh, we're gonna be totally fine. You just go, get your gay on."
Modern Family (2009)
"Oh, it is on like Donkey Kong."
Modern Family (2009)
"Or clearly it's not on yet. But it will be."
Modern Family (2009)
"So, okay. Come on. Let's go."
Modern Family (2009)
"I'm telling you, kid, this is a concert you're never gonna forget."
Modern Family (2009)
"Greatest music in the world."
Modern Family (2009)
"- What do you mean? - What are we seeing?"
Modern Family (2009)
"The symphony. The Four Seasons."
Modern Family (2009)
"I thought we were seeing Frankie Valli & the 4 Seasons."
Modern Family (2009)
"- No, you're not out. You're in. - I hate this kind of music."
Modern Family (2009)
"Jay, you always do that. Every time we try something new, your first reaction is always no."
Modern Family (2009)
"I'm old enough to know what I like and what I don't like."
Modern Family (2009)
"- What about the crab cakes? - That was a fluke."
Modern Family (2009)
"And I can't slather that boring music in tartar sauce."
Modern Family (2009)
"So I have to try new things... like scrambled eggs... but you don't have to?"
Modern Family (2009)
"You see what you're doing? You're tearing this family apart!"
Modern Family (2009)
"Take it down a notch. You two go in, have a great time."
Modern Family (2009)
"- I'll see you later. - What are you going to do?"
Modern Family (2009)
"I'm gonna walk like a man, fast as I can, to that bar over there."
Modern Family (2009)
"And if you knew Frankie Valli, you'd be cracking up right now."
Modern Family (2009)
"It's okay."
Modern Family (2009)
"John Schneider was the one."
Modern Family (2009)
"- John Schneider from Dukes of Hazzard? - That was your first crush?"
Modern Family (2009)
"Oh, my God, yes. Bo Duke. Delicious."
Modern Family (2009)
"He was a redneck who drove a car called the General Lee..."
Modern Family (2009)
"with a giant Confederate flag on it."
Modern Family (2009)
"That wasn't a turn off for you?"
Modern Family (2009)
"I know he was all kinds of wrong, but the heart wants what the heart wants."
Modern Family (2009)
"Richard Gere. Oh, my God."
Modern Family (2009)
"I'll be the officer... don't be a gentleman."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Montgomery Clift. - Who?"
Modern Family (2009)
"Don't do that, Crispin. You're not that young."
Modern Family (2009)
"Anyway, my crush was gay. At least I had a shot."
Modern Family (2009)
"You had a shot with Montgomery Clift? How old are you?"
Modern Family (2009)
"I will cut you like it was nothing, farm boy."
Modern Family (2009)
"Oh. See, I miss this."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Wait. What about you, Mitchell? - Um, okay."
Modern Family (2009)
"I didn't know it was a crush because I was only eight at the time."
Modern Family (2009)
"- I knew when I was eight. - Everyone knew when you were eight."
Modern Family (2009)
"Longines, get up. We're switching seats."
Modern Family (2009)
"Okay. Okay. Back to me. Back to me. Back to me."
Modern Family (2009)
"So I had just seen St. Elmo's Fire."
Modern Family (2009)
"Oh, Mitchell, look. It's your father."
Modern Family (2009)
"- He's cute. - Okay. Can you please turn it off for one second?"
Modern Family (2009)
"Oh, he's all alone. Invite him over."
Modern Family (2009)
"Yeah, that's not something we're gonna do."
Modern Family (2009)
"Relax. Your dad knows you're gay."
Modern Family (2009)
"- He doesn't know I'm this gay. - Excuse us?"
Modern Family (2009)
"- Oh, Mr. Pritchett! Yoo-hoo! - Jay. Jay."
Modern Family (2009)
"Oh, he looks like that dentist you hooked up with in Laguna."
Modern Family (2009)
"Oh, yeah, yeah. That was in my daddy phase."
Modern Family (2009)
"Yes, please, keep this up. This is fun for me."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Fellas, how you doin'? - Hey, Dad."
Modern Family (2009)
"Hi, Jay. - Hello, Daddy."
Modern Family (2009)
"- What are you doing here? - I'm just getting a drink while Gloria and Manny see a show."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Well, please, join us. - No, I don't want to intrude."
Modern Family (2009)
"- He doesn't want to intrude. - You are not intruding."
Modern Family (2009)
"- I'm gonna watch the game. - He wants to watch the game."
Modern Family (2009)
"Oh, sit down. We're up by 25 with a minute to go."
Modern Family (2009)
"Uh, maybe just for a minute. Okay."
Modern Family (2009)
"- So what does a guy gotta do to get a drink around here? - Nobody say anything."
Modern Family (2009)
"Justin, more booze."
Modern Family (2009)
"Mitchell was just about to tell us who his first boy crush was."
Modern Family (2009)
"- No, I wasn't. - Let me bring you up to speed."
Modern Family (2009)
"Crispin's was Joey Mclntyre... whoever that is."
Modern Family (2009)
"Longines said John Schneider."
Modern Family (2009)
"Cam's was Richard Gere. And I was Monty Clift."
Modern Family (2009)
"Well, at least yours was gay. I mean, you might've had a shot."
Modern Family (2009)
"Thank you!"
Modern Family (2009)
"- Mr. Kleezak? - Mr. Kleezak? It's open."
Modern Family (2009)
"Honey, he's not moving. Is he okay?"
Modern Family (2009)
"Well, there's only one way to find out."
Modern Family (2009)
"Mr. Kleezak? Okay."
Modern Family (2009)
"I... I don't know if he's breathing."
Modern Family (2009)
"- Does he have a pulse? - Well, there's only one way to find out."
Modern Family (2009)
"Will you stop pushing me? You do it."
Modern Family (2009)
"I hate this. I'm gonna kill Luke."
Modern Family (2009)
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