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Clips from The Muppet Show (1976) - Paul Williams (S01E01)

"♪ One I'm sure they wrote for you and me"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Listen to each evenin'"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ To underscore our love affair"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ With tenderness and feeling"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ That we've come to know"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ You'll swear you've heard it before"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ As it slowly rambles on and on"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ That's just an old-fashioned love song"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Comin' down in three-part harmony"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ One I'm sure they wrote for you and me"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Two, three, four..."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"(kazoo solo)"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"(blows into jug)"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ That's just an old-fashioned love song"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ One I'm sure they wrote for you and me"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ That's just an old-fashioned love song"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Comin' down in three-part harmony"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ That's just an old-fashioned love song"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ One I'm sure they wrote for you and me ♪"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"(applause)"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Bravo! Bravo! Encore! Encore!"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Heh heh! He's a credit to his race."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"What race is that? The 100-yard dash."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Welcome to Muppet Labs,"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"where the future is being made today."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Folks, let me take just one moment of your time"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"It's Muppets All-Purpose Tenderizer."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Now, you can use it on all sorts of dishes."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"For example, dishes like this one here."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"They do tend to break."
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"But if you had used All-Purpose Tenderizer"
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"your dish would have been as tender as this:"
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"Oh, it sets me all aquiver!"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Well, it's lovely. And what it does for dishes"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"it can do for utensils too. Watch."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"It only takes a second."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Muppets All-Purpose Tenderizer."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"It's new from Muppet Labs."
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"OK, who's the smarty-pants who tenderized the table?"
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"I mean it!"
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"Science, huh? They can put a man on the moon."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Huh. Yeah, but they can't put a moon on a man!"
The Muppet Show (1976)
""Silence."
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""Listen to the quietness"
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""of everlasting space."
The Muppet Show (1976)
""Down the winding velvet corridors of time it sweeps,"
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""and sweeps and sw..."
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""And sweeps away the sound of creatures"
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"crying in the night...""
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"(squawks loudly)"
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"For we have tasted the forbidden fruit.""
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"(munching)"
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""But lo, lo, the faceless names, name..."
The Muppet Show (1976)
""But, over all... over all,"
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""the blessed silence falls."
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""Sweet serpentines of silence"
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"singing their sad song.""
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"(singing)"
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""Out of the silence and dark"
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"we build the music, silent music.""
The Muppet Show (1976)
""And the endless emptiness of emptiness"
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"drumming in our ears...""
The Muppet Show (1976)
"(frenzied drum solo)"
The Muppet Show (1976)
""But in... in the end,"
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""all is silence."
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""Quiet, silent ways."
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"All still.""
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Could you hold it down, Rowlf? We're trying to do a show here."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"(sobs)"
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"You know, when they asked me to do the show, I was delighted."
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"This is a great show to do."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"I have a special reason for being very excited. You see..."
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"Except for me, the entire cast is Muppets."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Muppets are little, tiny things."
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"For the first time in my life,"
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"no one will make jokes about how short I am."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"For the first time in my life,"
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"I am the tallest person on the show."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"For the first time in my life,"
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"I am a telephone pole."
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"Hmm..."
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"Fozzie, what are you doing? It's my new act with Scooter."
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"I'm practicing to be a telephone pole."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"Hmm..."
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"That's ridiculous."
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"You don't look like a telephone pole."
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"No one would believe you were a telephone pole."
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"♪ I am a lineman for the county... ♪"
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"On the other hand,"
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"what do I know about telephone poles?"
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"(♪ tea dance music)"
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"How could you have a son that age?"
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"I didn't. When I had him, he was just a baby."
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"Oh, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"You are more beautiful than the summer days."
The Muppet Show (1976)
"You know, there's a lot of ham in you."
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"That man is annoying me."
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"He isn't even looking at you."
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"That's what's annoying me."
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"Yeah? What were you doing? I was a librarian!"
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"Sure, I'd love to."
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"OK, hang on..."
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"Waaargh! Aah!"
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"♪ Gwamp-gwamp-gwamp-gwamp"
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"♪ Gwamp-gwamp-gwamp-gwamp..."
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"♪ Gribbit-gribbit-gribbit..."
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"♪ I'm in love with a big blue frog"
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"♪ A big blue frog loves me"
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"♪ It's not as bad as it appears"
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"♪ He wears glasses and he's six foot three"
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"♪ Gwamp-gwamp-gwamp-gwamp"
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"♪ Gribbit-gribbit-gribbit"
The Muppet Show (1976)
"♪ Gwamp-gwamp-gwamp-gwamp... ♪ Gribbit-gribbit-gribbit..."
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"♪ They'll be great-lookin' 'cause they'll have my face"
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"♪ Great swimmers 'cause they'll have his feet"
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"♪ Gwamp-gwamp-gwamp-gwamp... ♪ Gribbit-gribbit-gribbit..."
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"♪ Well, I know we can make things work"
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"♪ He's got good family sense"
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"♪ His mother was a frog in Philadelphia"
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"♪ His daddy, an enchanted prince"
The Muppet Show (1976)
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