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Clips from Dinosaurs - Hurling Day (S01E01)

"(THEME MUSIC PLAYING)"
Dinosaurs
"And I get up 16 times in the middle of the night."
Dinosaurs
"I can no longer keep up with the herd."
Dinosaurs
"endangering my brethren, and making us late for everything."
Dinosaurs
"And so that this tradition remains holy and solemn,"
Dinosaurs
"Sure, why not?"
Dinosaurs
"No. That's tomorrow."
Dinosaurs
"Now, she's depending on you to throw her in that nice section of the tar pit"
Dinosaurs
"Oh, yeah, yeah. I'll do what I can, as long as she agrees to sink quickly."
Dinosaurs
"(LAUGHS)"
Dinosaurs
"-Not the Mama. -(GROANS)"
Dinosaurs
"-Not the Mama, not the Mama! -(EARL GROANS)"
Dinosaurs
"Hey, guys, Grandma's in the paper."
Dinosaurs
""Marriages, Births, Dismemberments, Large bites, Hurlings.""
Dinosaurs
"No one really knows, son, but we'll all find out when our time comes."
Dinosaurs
"And I want you to think of the tar pit as a wonderful place..."
Dinosaurs
"-Oh. -...where you'll want to spend eternity."
Dinosaurs
"-Yeah. -Hmm."
Dinosaurs
"-(MUSIC PLAYING OVER TV) -Oh. (GIGGLES) Hi, baby."
Dinosaurs
"Shh! Look!"
Dinosaurs
"Cross-eaters, today at 4:00 on Raptile."
Dinosaurs
"(HUMS) Hey, there pally boy, ready to give the mother-in-law"
Dinosaurs
"-the old heave-ho? -Roy, please, Fran's mother and I"
Dinosaurs
"(BOTH LAUGHING)"
Dinosaurs
"Genuine mother-in-law pterodactyl-skin hurling gloves!"
Dinosaurs
"-Yep. -SID: Hey, Earl!"
Dinosaurs
"-Tomorrow's the big day, huh? -Yeah."
Dinosaurs
""but did you see the loft he got on his mother-in-law?""
Dinosaurs
"Guys, you know, times like this, a guy feels very close to his buddies."
Dinosaurs
"Sinclair, I am a great and powerful dinosaur,"
Dinosaurs
"and you, well, you're a puny nothing."
Dinosaurs
"and you have no choice but to flatter me in return."
Dinosaurs
"That's a keen and brilliant observation, sir."
Dinosaurs
"One day, regardless of our station in life, when the lowest of the low"
Dinosaurs
"-by your sudden lack of cruelty. -(DRINK POURING)"
Dinosaurs
"-Nice gloves. -Hmm. Thank you, sir."
Dinosaurs
"-They were given to me by my fa... -I'm speaking!"
Dinosaurs
"Uh, yes, sir."
Dinosaurs
"-Good. -(SLURPS) Ah!"
Dinosaurs
"(SIGHS)"
Dinosaurs
"-Nice trajectory, sir. -Damn right."
Dinosaurs
"But the moment goes by so quickly, my captain."
Dinosaurs
"Well, not on slow-mo. (LAUGHS)"
Dinosaurs
"or I would've!"
Dinosaurs
"So, savor the moment, Sinclair."
Dinosaurs
"Uh, door."
Dinosaurs
"Yeah, she's in the tar!"
Dinosaurs
"No, son. Once you're in, you're in. Come on, give me another mother-in-law."
Dinosaurs
"-(ROBBIE GRUNTS) -Yeah."
Dinosaurs
"Uh, Dad, when Grandma goes into the tar pit,"
Dinosaurs
""Sorry you're being tossed off a cliff"?"
Dinosaurs
"She's lived her life. She has laid her eggs,"
Dinosaurs
"Now, you want to make dinner conversation?"
Dinosaurs
"-(DOORBELL RINGS) -FRAN: Earl, Mother's here."
Dinosaurs
"-There's a good girl. -ROBBIE: Hi, Gram."
Dinosaurs
"Come on, Mom, you're going to spoil him."
Dinosaurs
"Grandma, what's this worth to you?"
Dinosaurs
"Oh, wow. One hundred dollars."
Dinosaurs
"-(CHARLENE GROANS, WHINES) -It's the Baby."
Dinosaurs
"It's the Grandma!"
Dinosaurs
"-Hello, fat boy. -Hello, you vicious old bag of..."
Dinosaurs
"-But she... -One night."
Dinosaurs
"I do not want you to open your mouth."
Dinosaurs
"She provokes me."
Dinosaurs
"-(EARL GROANS) -Hello, fat boy."
Dinosaurs
"-(LAUGHS) -You see that, Fran?"
Dinosaurs
"she has to live in a cold, drafty hole in the wrong side"
Dinosaurs
"Let's go, old lady, we're going over the cliff right now!"
Dinosaurs
"And I want you to have this, it's a sea-shell necklace"
Dinosaurs
"Well, I'm bored out of my mind."
Dinosaurs
"FRAN: Good night, Mother. CHARLENE: Good night, Grandma."
Dinosaurs
"Yeah, you could get a divorce and marry someone else."
Dinosaurs
"-There's still 12 hours left. -Good night, Mother."
Dinosaurs
"four hours before she got hurled."
Dinosaurs
"I'm looking forward to it, dear. I miss my Louie."
Dinosaurs
"You don't remember your grandpa, do you? You were very young when he was hurled."
Dinosaurs
"come up with tuna fish, grouper, you name it."
Dinosaurs
"-"I hope you're good, too." (CHUCKLES) -(ETHYL CHUCKLING)"
Dinosaurs
"Yeah, yeah, you always wrote me."
Dinosaurs
"You're a young, sweet kid, Robbie. And you don't really know anything yet."
Dinosaurs
"I know, I know you're right."
Dinosaurs
"So, I can hardly believe I'm going to do this."
Dinosaurs
"Fran!"
Dinosaurs
"It's a time-honored tradition"
Dinosaurs
"started by a wise old dinosaur named Bob LaBrea."
Dinosaurs
"(RUSTLING)"
Dinosaurs
"-Come on, Grandma. -Forget about me. Hide yourself."
Dinosaurs
"Please, please, don't take this away from me!"
Dinosaurs
"EARL: Where have you been?"
Dinosaurs
"(LAUGHS)"
Dinosaurs
"Isn't throwing Grandma off a cliff just a waste of a perfectly good old lady?"
Dinosaurs
"-doesn't it make sense to you? -Oh, yeah, it certainly does."
Dinosaurs
"So, is the hat too much?"
Dinosaurs
"Just push the chair, fat boy."
Dinosaurs
"-Yeah, get your foot off the brake. -Oh, shut up."
Dinosaurs
"and created this hurling thing."
Dinosaurs
"Or you could have the momentary satisfaction"
Dinosaurs
"Well, then I guess my life means nothing, Dad."
Dinosaurs
"When the time comes, I'm not throwing you."
Dinosaurs
"and just because you get old doesn't mean you're not my father anymore."
Dinosaurs
"I'm an old dinosaur."
Dinosaurs
"There's no safe place for me anymore in this world."
Dinosaurs
"She's just an old dinosaur, Fran. She's just gonna be in the way."
Dinosaurs
"Fran, I'm not letting your mother move into my house"
Dinosaurs
"-I'm coming, Louie. -Earl, stop."
Dinosaurs
"Fran, if you love me, throw me in."
Dinosaurs
"You know... I feel like I could live to be a million."
Dinosaurs
"Jeez! (SIGHS)"
Dinosaurs
"That's the truth."
Dinosaurs
"(TRIBAL MUSIC PLAYING)"
Dinosaurs
"Honey, I'm home!"
Dinosaurs
"Today, I, your eldest elder, am..."
Dinosaurs
"-(WHISPERING) You're 72. -Oh, yes, 72 years old."
Dinosaurs
"I have lived long and witnessed many wonders."
Dinosaurs
"But now I am old. I am slow."
Dinosaurs
"I straggle behind, attracting predators,"
Dinosaurs
"Don't act like you haven't noticed."
Dinosaurs
"-(INDISTINCT CHATTER) -(ALL APPLAUD)"
Dinosaurs
"-But before I go... -DINOSAUR 1: Here it comes."
Dinosaurs
"...I now decree that from this day forward,"
Dinosaurs
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