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Clips from How I Met Your Mother - Farhampton (S08E08)

"Well, I'm glad..."
How I Met Your Mother
"that deleting our entire time together was so easy for you..."
How I Met Your Mother
"but I guarantee you, Quinn is gonna find out eventually."
How I Met Your Mother
"No, she won't. I just need your help. Yours too."
How I Met Your Mother
"Tell Quinn what?"
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"- Exactly. - No, she's really asking."
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"Tell Quinn what?"
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"[Together] Ooh."
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"- Can't climb the drainpipe. - What?"
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"When I was in fourth grade, I couldn't climb the rope in gym class..."
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"and all the other kids made fun of me even though it wasn't my fault."
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"I had to go after Efthimios Papajapoulos."
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"The rope was slick with lamb grease!"
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"Here. Here's the key to the dressing room."
How I Met Your Mother
"- [German Accent ] Can I help you? - [Clears Throat ] Hi."
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"I'm the church handyman."
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"I'm here to fix the... broken thing. It's busted."
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"The bride is taking a schnooze."
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"She asked me to stand watch so that no one disturbs her."
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"- I'll be quick. - You will be dead."
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"I used to wrestle in Leipzig."
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"You're not there. He gets it."
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"No, you were right. I have to leave a note. It's common courtesy."
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"Well, it's not gonna be possible with Andrea the Giant standing guard up there."
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"Oh, right. Klaus's sister."
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"It's too bad Barney's not here."
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"[Chuckling ] Man, he lives for bridesmaids."
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"Right, but he's not."
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"And it's not like he could seduce Uta over the phone."
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"[Chuckles]"
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"Challenge accepted!"
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"- Honey, it's not cheating if it's on the phone, right? - Say what now?"
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"Quinn's on board! Text me her number."
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"You filthy, disgusting man!"
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"But, yes, I will do that to myself at your instruction."
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"Let me find a broom closet."
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"Oh, ja. Gut."
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"I did it. I did it!"
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"You're amazing. Let's get out of here."
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"I left the car keys in the dressing room."
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"I'm pretty sure the door locked behind me."
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"- [ Horn Honks] - [ Victoria] Oh, God."
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"[ Honking Continues]"
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"I found it kind of insulting that Barney doesn't think we can keep this secret."
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"I mean, yeah, Marvin's keeping us up all night..."
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"but he's still the prettiest little girl in the city."
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"[ Laughs]"
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"Baby, did you just hear yourself?"
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"You said, "Prettiest little girl in the city.""
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"- I think you meant "country." - Yeah. [Sighs]"
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"Hey, what does Barney think?"
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"We're just gonna blurt out that he used to date-"
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"- [ Door Opens] - Shh!"
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"Quinn could've heard us through the- [ Mouth Word ]"
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"Good catch."
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"- Barney used to date Robin? - [ Both Scream ]"
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"- [ Marvin Crying ] - Oh."
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"When did you get in here?"
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"Like, 10 minutes ago when you said..."
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""Hey, Quinn, let's all go hang out in Marvin's room.""
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"Auf Wiedersehen, Fräulein."
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"You know, I hate to perpetuate the stereotype..."
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"but German female wrestlers from Saxony..."
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"are just begging for it."
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"You dated Robin?"
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"I'm sorry I lied to you."
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"I'll tell you everything, the whole story."
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"Fine. You have one minute before I walk out that door."
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"Um, it's, uh, kind of a long story, Quinn."
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"Gonna take a little bit longer than a minute."
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"Seven years ago, when Marshall and Lily got engaged..."
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"Ted saw Robin across a crowded room, and I said..."
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""Oh, yeah, you just know she likes it dirty.""
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"But Ted really liked her, so we played "Have you met Ted?""
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"They went to dinner. He walked her home."
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"Should have kissed her, didn't. Lame."
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"So he stole a Smurf penis. Went to her place."
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"Should've kissed her, didn't. Lame. He threw three parties."
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"They kissed on the roof, but decided to be friends. Lame."
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"Then Ted wanted to take Robin to a wedding."
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"She couldn't go. He went alone and met Victoria."
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"Didn't kiss her either. Lame. Not a great closer, Ted."
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"But he finally kissed her."
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"Ted kissed Robin. Lost Victoria. Ted did a rain dance."
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"Got Robin. Ted and Robin broke up."
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"Robin moved to Brazil. Came back with a Latin stud."
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"Ted got jealous. Got a tramp stamp."
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"Not relevant to the story. I just like mentioning that."
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"Ted got hit by a bus. We made up."
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"[Takes Deep Breath ] Robin and I started dating."
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"I got fat. Her hair fell out."
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"We broke up. Robin dated Don. I dated Nora."
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"Cheated on her with Robin. I dumped Nora."
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"Robin dated Kevin, but not for long."
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"Then I met you. You took my grandpa's watch."
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"I fell in love with you anyway. You let me fart in front of you."
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"I asked you to marry me. You said yes."
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"We came over here to meet little Marvin. And that's everything!"
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"Good-bye, Barney."
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"Good-I ju-"
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"She lets you fart in front of her?"
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"Barney, you go get that girl."
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"[Grunts] Oh, God!"
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"- I cannot get married today! - Klaus?"
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"I threw up in the cloakroom. I blamed a small child."
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"I cannot get married. I left a note."
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"Good for you. Not everyone thinks of that."
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"Who doesn't leave a note? It's common courtesy."
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"Thank you!"
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"- Do you have the time? - Um, yeah. It's 20 after 7:00."
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"Ah, sehr gut. I can still make the 8:05 back to the city."
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"Auf Wiedersehen."
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"[ Ted Narrating] And suddenly it hit me"
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"a way to absolve Victoria of any blame."
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"All I had to do was climb that drainpipe."
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"What? No, Klaus, no."
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"Mach schnell, sleepyhead. It's time to-"
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"I know about you and Barney."
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"[Gasps] Who told her?"
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"Look, there is nothing going on between me and Robin."
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