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Clips from Curb Your Enthusiasm - The Blind Date (S04E04)

"I mean, see, because I'm a magician,"
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"if you were naturally a magician,"
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"- Magicians don't reveal their secrets. - Fine, I gotta go."
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"You guys are a lot alike."
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"- You going to that Halloween party? - Of course."
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"- You are? - Yeah, we're taking you."
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"- it's a Halloween party. - I'm not gonna wear a costume!"
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"So, last night at about 11:30,"
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"- Oh, really? - Yeah."
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"I always have the energy, yeah."
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"- Kain ein horeh. - Kain ein horeh."
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"So I'm thinking about Jenna Jameson, you know?"
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"And, um, all of a sudden, she pops out."
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"You know who pops in? You're not gonna believe this."
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"Cheryl. Can you believe that?"
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"What do you mean? You used..."
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"Yeah, she was there. I couldn't believe it."
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"Boom, she was there."
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"She pops in? Why didn't you pop her out?"
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"- What, she insisted on staying? - Not exactly."
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""I want to be here with you, Jeff"?"
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"I couldn't pop her out, I'm not in control of it."
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"Your bench is thin? What, is she on your team now?"
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"No, she's not on my team. She popped in."
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"It's... ugh!"
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"You, my wife... I just don't like the whole idea."
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"- It didn't really happen. - I know, but it feels... in your mind."
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"- Do me a favor, okay? - What?"
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"I don't want you using my wife anymore for that, okay?"
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"I'll never intentionally use your wife for that."
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"- What do you mean? - You can't control who pops in."
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"Yeah? Okay, next time she pops in,"
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"pick your pants up and get out of the room."
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"Hello."
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"- How you doing? - Very well, thank you."
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"- Yes, it's going very well. Thank you. - Great great great."
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"Wait till you get the kid. It'll change your life."
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""Get the kid"?"
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"- You can go on back. - Okay."
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"I've got one tiny thing, just one small issue."
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"You'll be so happy, you'll be hanging around the toilet every day."
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"- You'll get me the softer rolls? - You got it!"
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"- All right! - Mel, can we get"
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"to why you asked Larry to come here?"
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"Oh, yeah, we have a little problem. Yeah, right."
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"Ben Stiller is gone."
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"He is history. He has left us."
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"He came to me and said, "It's either me"
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"or Larry David. Make up your mind.""
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"You know, I went right..."
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"Larry David, Stiller out."
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"He complained about some things. I don't know, minor stuff."
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"You wouldn't sit in the front of a car?"
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"You couldn't move into the front of the car?"
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"I have to move up to... we were two minutes away from where we were going."
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"They were two minutes away from where they were going!"
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"At Ben Stiller's birthday party, you didn't bring a present."
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"- He said no gifts. - They always say no gift,"
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"but everybody brings a gift."
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"I happen to have a small phobia"
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"about shaking people's hands who have snot on it."
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"- It's a small thing. - Can you blame him?"
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"At the party, everybody sang "Happy Birthday" but you."
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"I don't like the "Happy Birthday" song."
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"He never sings the "Happy Birthday" song."
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"I don't like it either. I hate the song!"
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"- Right into the kid's eye! - Can I say something?"
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"Blessing in disguise."
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"- Everything will work out. - All right."
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"Pink, blue, soft... anything you want."
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"Listen, you know, don't worry about Ben Stiller."
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"In my mind, I've got a couple of wonderful people."
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"Think about that guy. Think about that."
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"He can move well, sings well."
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"And we'd save a little money on the marquee."
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""Larry David Schwimmer," get it?"
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"- Okay, bad joke. - That's a good idea. I like that."
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"- Think about it. - Bye, fellas, thank you."
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"- Okay, good to see you. - Bye-bye."
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"God bless. Keep up the good work."
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"I'm telling you, there's something wrong with this guy!"
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"He's mentally challenged."
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"There is something about this middle-aged bald guy"
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"that is thrilling!"
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"Car wash! Car wash!"
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"- Come on. - We got one."
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"For the Langley Center. It's a charity"
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"- Okay. - $10."
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"- Here you go. - $10."
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"Your foot's wet and you're on..."
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"- Oh, sorry. - You're on the seat."
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"- It looks pretty clean in here. - Aw, it's dusty."
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"- Look, don't dump the- - You're making a mess."
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"I think it's okay now."
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"I guess I'll get going now. That's okay."
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"Fuck!"
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"Well, guess what? I'm out of gas."
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"You left no gas in the car."
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"I don't know."
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"I'm nowhere near a gas station. I gotta pee so bad."
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"Where's my sunblock?"
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"I'll bet you those guys took my sunblock."
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"You know what?"
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"Hi, sir. I'm so sorry to bother you."
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"I know this is gonna sound a little crazy,"
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"- Is it possible just... - No!"
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"Would it be possible? I can just get in for two minutes..."
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"You know, I was driving by and I couldn't help but..."
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"I'd like to make an offer on your house."
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"10 bucks for a pee."
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"May I help you?"
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"My car is out of gas,"
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"and I'm just desperate to use a bathroom."
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"Come in, please come in. Be my invited guest."
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"- You're kidding? - Please come in."
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"Whoo!"
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"Refreshed?"
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"That was so nice of you to do that."
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"And can I just say something?"
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"If you're ever in my neighborhood"
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