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Clips from Superstore - Guns, Pills and Birds (S02E02)

"Adam, I was really looking forward to this weekend."
Superstore
"I was gonna wear sweatpants and slippers and no bra."
Superstore
"Can you take a couple steps back?"
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"I promise, I will make it up to you,"
Superstore
"but could you please just let this one go?"
Superstore
"Just this one time?"
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"Just this one time."
Superstore
"Okay."
Superstore
"Look, I gotta go."
Superstore
"How can I help you, sir?"
Superstore
"I have a complaint about one of your salesmen."
Superstore
"But you said I have the right"
Superstore
"to refuse service to anybody I want."
Superstore
"Yes, technically you have the right,"
Superstore
"If I was using common sense,"
Superstore
"I would take all of these guns and throw them out the door."
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"You know what I mean."
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"Look, I told you I wasn't comfortable"
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"working the gun counter."
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"Yeah, and I told you that you have to."
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"Ugh, god forbid you let something go"
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"for once in your life."
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"Why do I have to let it go?"
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"It's not my job to make"
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"every man in the world's life easier."
Superstore
"I'm not moving you."
Superstore
"Well, I'm not changing what I'm doing."
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"Ugh!"
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"Why is everybody being such a jerk today?"
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"- I think the bird... - Yeah."
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"I know."
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"I just feel so bad"
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"about letting my moral priorities"
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"interfere with your buying choices,"
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"especially because for all I know,"
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"You know, maybe you're gonna use them"
Superstore
"as plates in a doll's house"
Superstore
"No, we had unprotected sex last night."
Superstore
"Okay, buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh!"
Superstore
"What I don't know can't hurt me"
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"or send me to hell."
Superstore
"Just kidding."
Superstore
"Um, so do you have cash?"
Superstore
"I'm sorry; I just have way too many concerns"
Superstore
"about your level of anger."
Superstore
"This is discrimination."
Superstore
"I'm gonna call the NRA about this."
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"Okay, well, you know,"
Superstore
"What is going on?"
Superstore
"Here's what's going on."
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"This entire place is a dictatorship,"
Superstore
"and it's being ruled over by Emperor Amy."
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"Oh, god, can you guys just act like adults"
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"and have an affair or something?"
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"What? No, shh!"
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"Listen."
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"If Amy wants me to run the gun counter,"
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"then Amy needs to understand"
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"that I get to decide who gets the guns."
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"And I'm gonna make those decisions fairly"
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"and with due diligence."
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"I'm sorry. I just don't trust redheads."
Superstore
"Too fiery."
Superstore
"Congratulations on being sexually active."
Superstore
"I'm sorry?"
Superstore
"Okay, I know I probably can't talk you"
Superstore
"out of buying contraception, right?"
Superstore
"I mean, that's just not gonna happen."
Superstore
"I didn't ask for any assistance."
Superstore
"So if it's gonna happen no matter what,"
Superstore
"these are $50 each."
Superstore
"Okay, now, I'm not looking to make a profit."
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"That's the price I paid"
Superstore
"plus a small donation to the pro-life coalition."
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"You know? And..."
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"We're all gonna die in here!"
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"Okay, everybody calm down."
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"Gun owners are just exercising their second amendment rights."
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"It's all perfectly legal."
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"overshadow the real problem, which is the crows."
Superstore
"Well, apparently Jonah was denying service"
Superstore
"to everybody who wanted to buy a gun, so..."
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"Oh, what a D bag."
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"I shouldn't have been there in the first place, okay?"
Superstore
"What?"
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"Amy, can you just move Jonah?"
Superstore
"No, he doesn't get to win."
Superstore
"Ugh. Why are you being like this?"
Superstore
""Like this." What is "like this"?"
Superstore
"I'm doing my job."
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"Oh, my god, just bang already."
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"That's what I been saying."
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"Gross."
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"- Eww. - Okay, okay."
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"We're all feeling emotional,"
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"but we're gonna get through this safely together."
Superstore
"And then we can go home to our loved ones."
Superstore
"having sex with them tonight, come see me."
Superstore
"All right, meeting dismissed."
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"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold up."
Superstore
"What about this crow emergency, y'all?"
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"Hold up."
Superstore
"Hey, guys, we gotta do something."
Superstore
"They got the same brain-to-body ratio as humans."
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"A group of 'em's called a murder!"
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"Judy!"
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"Judy!"
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"Attention, shoppers."
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"as I will be making some noises"
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"that replicate the calls of the crows' natural enemies."
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"This will drive them out of the store."
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"Thank you."
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"Koo-wik"
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"ka!"
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"Whip-poor-will, will, will, will, will, will, will."
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"Hoo!"
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"Hoo!"
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"Hoo!"
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"Oh, !"
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"in the mother tent!"
Superstore
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