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Clips from Superstore - Guns, Pills and Birds (S02E02)

"with 12 French bread pizzas."
Superstore
"I'm not gonna eat all of them..."
Superstore
"- Okay, good. - But what if I burn one, Jonah?"
Superstore
"Or what if there's a manufacturer's cheese error?"
Superstore
"I've worked two doubles in a row this week."
Superstore
"Just me, the couch, some Cloud 9 brand wine..."
Superstore
"A Neuage Neuf classique, of course."
Superstore
"And some amazing movies."
Superstore
"Oh, there's a Danish drama on Netflix that..."
Superstore
"Wrong answer."
Superstore
"I'm thinking mid-'90s Rom-come,"
Superstore
"like Freddie Prinze Jr. takes the nerd to the prom"
Superstore
"because underneath those glasses,"
Superstore
"she's really beautiful, Jonah."
Superstore
"She's beautiful."
Superstore
"It sounds like you got the whole thing figured out,"
Superstore
"and you deserve it, so you go off and have fun."
Superstore
"But I'm just gonna throw this out there,"
Superstore
"Garrett and I are gonna watch some basketball later..."
Superstore
"You want to be alone."
Superstore
"- Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. - Got it. Have fun."
Superstore
"I'm free."
Superstore
"Oh."
Superstore
"Cool."
Superstore
"Attention, shoppers, there's a 40% off sale"
Superstore
"in our exercise gear section,"
Superstore
"which will be closing next week due to lack of interest."
Superstore
"Over in patio furniture, we're gonna have... ahh!"
Superstore
"Uh..."
Superstore
"my bad, y'all."
Superstore
"That reaction was very out of character for me."
Superstore
"I'm normally a very cool guy."
Superstore
"- Hey. - Hey. Hey!"
Superstore
"Um, I'd like that 9-millimeter"
Superstore
"and a box of bullets, please."
Superstore
"Yes, got it. You wanted the 9-millimeter."
Superstore
"And a box of bullets."
Superstore
"Coming right up."
Superstore
"I'm gonna go ahead and grab that for you."
Superstore
"right... That's the one."
Superstore
"Yeah, this is... yeah, no, I..."
Superstore
"It's coming... ooh, wow."
Superstore
"Ooh, that's... that's heavy."
Superstore
"This feels like..."
Superstore
"like an 11-millimeter, am I right?"
Superstore
"The bullets, yep."
Superstore
"Uh..."
Superstore
"All clear."
Superstore
"All clear."
Superstore
"Hey, uh, Tate,"
Superstore
"is it true we sell the morning-after pill?"
Superstore
"We definitely have the morning-after pill."
Superstore
"Yeah, right over there."
Superstore
"Oh. Wow."
Superstore
"- So prominent. - Yeah."
Superstore
"Listen, Tate,"
Superstore
"I would never ask you to sell something"
Superstore
"that you were not comfortable with,"
Superstore
"so if you wanna remove them from the pharmacy,"
Superstore
"I will support you."
Superstore
"Are you kidding?"
Superstore
"I have to keep a couple boxes at timeshare in Tampa."
Superstore
"- Tampa? - Oh, yeah."
Superstore
"Women love it there. You know what I mean?"
Superstore
"Yeah, it's a sick place."
Superstore
"It's only, like, 12 miles from the beach."
Superstore
"Okay, but between us,"
Superstore
"could you just find a reason"
Superstore
"to take them off the shelf?"
Superstore
"You know, um..."
Superstore
"maybe say that they're, like, expired?"
Superstore
"That would be a lie."
Superstore
"Tate, do you believe in God?"
Superstore
"- Yeah, I think there's a god. - Yeah?"
Superstore
"But I think he lives in nature."
Superstore
"You know, the rocks and trees and crap like that."
Superstore
"Honestly, I think God could be a frog."
Superstore
"Oh, brother."
Superstore
"So what are we talking?"
Superstore
"Rook? Western jackdaw? Thick-billed?"
Superstore
"I don't know. It was a crow."
Superstore
"Who cares what kind?"
Superstore
"Um, we care."
Superstore
"We're gonna get it out of the store safely."
Superstore
"Right. Obviously. Priority one is safety."
Superstore
"Forget safety... I say we pull the fire alarm,"
Superstore
"clear out the store, turn up the heat,"
Superstore
"make the whole place a oven, problem solved."
Superstore
"Whoa, easy, that's a little violent."
Superstore
"Yeah, psycho, why would anyone want to hurt a bird?"
Superstore
"Okay, A: 'cause they're dirty flying dinosaurs."
Superstore
"No one is hurting the crow."
Superstore
"They are amazing creatures that recognize human face"
Superstore
"and they throw each other funerals."
Superstore
"Funerals."
Superstore
"Why would you give me that information?"
Superstore
"That doesn't calm me down!"
Superstore
"Excuse me, sir."
Superstore
"Um..."
Superstore
"are... are you talking to me?"
Superstore
"Oh, yeah. You."
Superstore
"We would to buy one rifle, please."
Superstore
"Just the one rifle, please and thank you."
Superstore
"What... what are you gonna hunt for?"
Superstore
"Uh, liars."
Superstore
"Elk. Hunting elk."
Superstore
"Um..."
Superstore
"if you could excuse me for one moment."
Superstore
"I'm just gonna sit in front of my television,"
Superstore
"and I'm gonna eat and drink whatever I want."
Superstore
"Mm-hmm, okay, well, what you're describing"
Superstore
"is every single day of my life."
Superstore
"- Really? - Uh, hey."
Superstore
"So there is someone over there that I really,"
Superstore
"really don't think should be allowed to own a gun,"
Superstore
"Um... or a car or a fork."
Superstore
"What do I do?"
Superstore
"Well, I mean, you're allowed to deny him service"
Superstore
"but only if you think he's actually dangerous."
Superstore
"Okay, good."
Superstore
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