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Clips from Clone High - Election Blu-Galoo (S01E01)

"Trust me."
Clone High
"That is why it is my great pleasure,"
Clone High
"This is probably the last time I'll ever use these oversized novelty scissors,"
Clone High
"unless..."
Clone High
"a giant needs a haircut!"
Clone High
"Oh god!"
Clone High
"I'm sorry, what?"
Clone High
"- I've never heard of that. - It's a very common expression."
Clone High
"Stupid, Joan."
Clone High
"Oh, JFK."
Clone High
"Thank god, because I hate it when--"
Clone High
"There, there."
Clone High
"My only hope is that someone, and I have no idea who,"
Clone High
"labelled "Dr Scudworth's Evil Plan"?"
Clone High
"Actually, we're sponsored by Puma."
Clone High
"for dry erase markers and such!"
Clone High
"No no no no no no no no no."
Clone High
"Sell out?"
Clone High
"Why, that idea's as foolish as getting new brakes from anywhere but Midas."
Clone High
"So what you're saying is,"
Clone High
"So your product is called..."
Clone High
"Is it something you eat?"
Clone High
"I see."
Clone High
"We accept your offer."
Clone High
"Ask what you can do to your student body president's body!"
Clone High
"But, first and foremost,"
Clone High
"Uh, Abe?"
Clone High
"What stinks in here, man?"
Clone High
"and promote their product by doing some dangerous extreme sports related stunts!"
Clone High
"You're ahead!"
Clone High
"I'm the number five!"
Clone High
"Someone who's leading the polls."
Clone High
"And who's named Abe."
Clone High
"I wanna manage your campaign."
Clone High
"And then..."
Clone High
"Well how about..."
Clone High
"Okay, no dental dam."
Clone High
"Abe."
Clone High
"Hello, Clone High!"
Clone High
"With celebrity panelists Marilyn Manson,"
Clone High
"I can't see, due to the glare,"
Clone High
"- May I respond to that? - Yes you may."
Clone High
"To my head!"
Clone High
"Abe, it all comes down to..."
Clone High
"It is my professional opinion, as a singer and a licensed doctor,"
Clone High
"Fellow students,"
Clone High
"to jazz up an old product with extreme marketing."
Clone High
"Well, I don't deserve your votes!"
Clone High
"There goes our ghetto fabulous lifestyle."
Clone High
"You should vote for Abe."
Clone High
"even if it makes him look like a jackass."
Clone High
"That's the kind of jackass I want in my corner."
Clone High
"the official voting system of Clone Hiiigh."
Clone High
"Previously, on a very special Clone High."
Clone High
"Robotic butlers cared."
Clone High
"because they are special."
Clone High
"I'm surprised Cleopatra didn't fill the moat with acid."
Clone High
"Actually, Cleo says it would kill the piranhas."
Clone High
"Hey, community! Skinny dipping in the piranha moat!"
Clone High
"Ugh, it makes me so mad I could kiss you!"
Clone High
"As in uh, "Oh, I'm so angry I I could piss glue"."
Clone High
"Well, see ya."
Clone High
"elected president."
Clone High
"But now..."
Clone High
"resign, and endorse me as his replacement."
Clone High
"is maturing according to schedule."
Clone High
"You know,"
Clone High
"someone would be into student government."
Clone High
"I'm not fit to be president."
Clone High
"Clumsy, Joan. Reeaally clumsy."
Clone High
"It's really just pancake batter mixed with blue house paint in a blue sports bottle."
Clone High
"Young men and women, please give it up,"
Clone High
"That totally answers my question!"
Clone High
"Hey, don't worry man, your problems are answered."
Clone High
"FLIP A NOLLIE AND TURN IT UP!"
Clone High
"LINCOLN AND X-STREAM BLU WILL LITERALLY CRUNCH THE GOOGLY TO THE MAX!"
Clone High
"And all you gotta do, is abandon your values,"
Clone High
"But I'm not match for that gang of snow sharks!"
Clone High
"But what should we do with all this X-Stream Blu?"
Clone High
"Abe, I just polled everyone in the girl's bathroom."
Clone High
"things are going to work out with JFK."
Clone High
"Wait. You're named Abe."
Clone High
"All the pictures of him I have over my bed are coming down!"
Clone High
"and if there's one thing I've learned about money,"
Clone High
"Baby, a lot of people liked the original JFK because he was such a caring leader,"
Clone High
"Hark!"
Clone High
"I'm gonna be uh, busy nailing this kinky broad for the next fifteen minutes!"
Clone High
"Just like the real Abe Lincoln would've done,"
Clone High
"Hey everybody!"
Clone High
"It just makes sense."
Clone High
"I think I just..."
Clone High
"It doesn't work that way, Gandhi."
Clone High
"I come out here to think sometimes."
Clone High
"not thinking about you over there on your thinking dock,"
Clone High
"And that's out of, my friendship."
Clone High
"And now. He risks his ass..."
Clone High
"captain, of the football team,"
Clone High
"and el capitan of the f~~tbol team,"
Clone High
"you won't put yourself at risk of physical harm in order to gain approval."
Clone High
"That is a uh, good question, scary androgynous white guy!"
Clone High
"But he's avoiding the fact that X-Stream Blu"
Clone High
"You may now attach the skateboard..."
Clone High
"Bling, bling."
Clone High
"Looks like Lincoln is your new president."
Clone High
"Thanks, Joan."
Clone High
"Hey there, president. That's a cute collar."
Clone High
"Well Gandhi, I'll tell you."
Clone High
"~ It's the food pyramid ~"
Clone High
"Joan of Arc, don't think about the moat in terms of its devisive ignorance,"
Clone High
"No, I I said, I I I cou-- I could piss... glue..."
Clone High
"Who?"
Clone High
"Thank you JFK."
Clone High
"and use them in an expensive clone themed amusement park,"
Clone High
"then shame on you!"
Clone High
"That's why she likes JFK, because he's a natural leader."
Clone High
"Dead presidents, Mr B!"
Clone High
"Ask not what your student body president can do for you!"
Clone High
"Just give me a few more minutes of denial."
Clone High
"Guys, come on in here, man!"
Clone High
"No way!"
Clone High
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