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Clips from American Dad! - Don't Look a Smith Horse in the Mouth (S05E05)

"You could put my brain back into a human body..."
American Dad!
"- I'm just trying to help. - Then tell him you think it's a terrible idea."
American Dad!
"Well, Klaus, we certainly still have the brain-switching technology down at the C. I.A."
American Dad!
"You know what? No. No."
American Dad!
"It's not working for me."
American Dad!
"- Dad- - Shut up, Hayley!"
American Dad!
"Dear Lord, I hope you're not still mad at us humans..."
American Dad!
"So, Lord, if you could, help me find a way to keep my S.U.V."
American Dad!
"[Wind Whistling]"
American Dad!
"Well, I'll be a son of a bitch."
American Dad!
"- What is it, Dad? - It's a horse."
American Dad!
"And it's racing today. It's a sign!"
American Dad!
"I gotta save my S.U.V."
American Dad!
"You know what? Don't. You've done enough."
American Dad!
"Don't let her see that you're suffocating."
American Dad!
"[Gasping] Don't give her the satisfaction."
American Dad!
"[Gasping Continues]"
American Dad!
"Man, this place is creepy."
American Dad!
"- [Passing Gas] - Calm down, Barry."
American Dad!
"Nice guy. Always smiling."
American Dad!
"Mr. Tuttle!"
American Dad!
"- [Metal Clanging] - [Passing Gas]"
American Dad!
"[Door Squeaking]"
American Dad!
"- Mr. Tuttle! - [Tuttle] Company!"
American Dad!
"You've- You've put on a little weight."
American Dad!
"It's mostly fat."
American Dad!
"## [Trumpet: "Call to the Post"]"
American Dad!
"Man, Well I'll Be A Son Of A Bitch is a good-Iooking horse."
American Dad!
"[Male Announcer] And coming down the stretch..."
American Dad!
"[Grunts] I am gonna go spit on the jockey."
American Dad!
"Hello."
American Dad!
"Mm-hmm. Yes, I am a jockey."
American Dad!
"Davy Jones from The Monkees started out as a jockey."
American Dad!
"Damn it, Roger! That horse was my last hope to save my S.U.V."
American Dad!
"- Another very bad race, Clancy. - I'm Clancy."
American Dad!
"Sorry, Mr. McCormick. We'll do better next week."
American Dad!
"- Mr. McCormick, no! - Uh, sorry, Clancy."
American Dad!
"- [Hammer Cocks] - I'll buy him."
American Dad!
"You don't have $50,000."
American Dad!
"- Do you? - Of course not."
American Dad!
"Oh!"
American Dad!
"- It's a guaranteed winner. - What? That horse is a joke."
American Dad!
"I'll let it run to its full potential, and we'll make a fortune."
American Dad!
"And if he doesn't win, I'd lose everything. Are you sure about this?"
American Dad!
"that's gonna keep you from ending up in a car like that."
American Dad!
"- It's so efficient. - And the radio only gets N.P.R."
American Dad!
"- We're nerds! - Kill us!"
American Dad!
"Like when you passed out last Christmas Eve and I made out with you."
American Dad!
"- What? - Hmm?"
American Dad!
"Roger, I told you everyone has to cut back."
American Dad!
"Only one thin layer of cream cheese."
American Dad!
"- Stan spent your life savings on a horse. - What?"
American Dad!
"I can't eat a bagel right now. It's Passover."
American Dad!
"## [Singing In Hebrew]"
American Dad!
"- [Stopwatch Clicks] - Ha! Record time."
American Dad!
"We're gonna get through this, baby."
American Dad!
"I'm gonna take you to Make-out Point and tongue your gas hole."
American Dad!
"Do you realize we could lose this house?"
American Dad!
"Do you realize how much danger you put this family in..."
American Dad!
"to save this stupid thing?"
American Dad!
"I'll be able to afford my S.U. V..."
American Dad!
"and you'll be able to watch me drive around the block..."
American Dad!
"from your brand-new lawn chair!"
American Dad!
"You better be right about this horse, Stan..."
American Dad!
"- or we're screwed. - [Horse Galloping]"
American Dad!
"See? I told you this thing was fast."
American Dad!
"- Stop telling Francine on me! - Ow! Geez, that really hurt."
American Dad!
"You broke me. I'm broken."
American Dad!
"You're gonna have to do the horse chores, 'cause I'm broken."
American Dad!
"Fine. What do I have to do?"
American Dad!
"- Huh? - Take the glue out of the factory."
American Dad!
"Spank his front butt. Grant him a bone loan."
American Dad!
"Oh! l- Oh, no. You're kidding."
American Dad!
"No, sir, I am not. I am stabling a champion racehorse."
American Dad!
"A full release ensures a rejuvenative rest and promotes a winning attitude."
American Dad!
"So... hi."
American Dad!
"How's it going?"
American Dad!
"[Inhales] Here we go."
American Dad!
"Just, uh, do me a favor and let me know when you're about to..."
American Dad!
"Hey, Stan, can you tuck me in and..."
American Dad!
"- You did! - You told me to."
American Dad!
"Well, I was just messing with you for punching me in the arm."
American Dad!
"But l- I can't believe you did it."
American Dad!
"Oh! Too good. Too good. Oh!"
American Dad!
"Well, good night."
American Dad!
"Well, Mr. Tuttle, we're done."
American Dad!
"You boys have done a fantastic job."
American Dad!
"- Hooray! - All right!"
American Dad!
"I have cash in my wallet."
American Dad!
"- Great. Where is it? - It's in my back pocket. Grab it for me."
American Dad!
"Not it."
American Dad!
"I want this."
American Dad!
"[Whinnying]"
American Dad!
"- What's going on? - He's been acting this way all morning. He's spooked."
American Dad!
"Why is the animal..."
American Dad!
"that our future depends on doing that?"
American Dad!
"Oh, he's fine. He was expecting some sunglasses in the mail that didn't come."
American Dad!
"You'd better know what you're doing..."
American Dad!
"you dumb Irish bastard."
American Dad!
"We've gotta get this thing un-spooked."
American Dad!
"Let's just pray that for once when we get there, he doesn't turn out to be me."
American Dad!
"- [Scraping] - Oh, crap."
American Dad!
"Can I help you?"
American Dad!
"Oh, yes. He'll be right with you."
American Dad!
"Thank God I'm just his secretary."
American Dad!
"I'm an associate."
American Dad!
"- Then you go in for the wallet. - Got it."
American Dad!
"You know, when the stone door was closing..."
American Dad!
"- [All Grunt] - [Muffled Yelling]"
American Dad!
"[Grunting]"
American Dad!
"[Speaking Japanese]"
American Dad!
"Snot's gonna die! [Passes Gas]"
American Dad!
"Ah, scaredy farts, huh?"
American Dad!
"Don't you start, 'cause you're gonna get me going."
American Dad!
"[Muffled Yelling]"
American Dad!
"[Whispering] What you wanna do you're gonna make sure- Imagine."
American Dad!
"Visualize."
American Dad!
"Horse whispering- does this stuff really work?"
American Dad!
"[Whispering Continues]"
American Dad!
"- [Whispering] - [Gasps]"
American Dad!
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