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Clips from Scrubs - My Office (S04E04)

"Oh. Sorry. Where were we?"
Scrubs
"I am a professional, and you are not gonna get me to compete with Elliot."
Scrubs
"Impress me."
Scrubs
"Oh, I'll impress you!"
Scrubs
"That's funny. I have an uncle named "Stop bothering me.""
Scrubs
"Dr Kelso said that since psychiatrists are the Wal-Mart greeters of medicine,"
Scrubs
"and I was wondering if I could observe you."
Scrubs
"My day is already bad enough on account of I gotta tell Mr Roman that he..."
Scrubs
"Oh, my God. Mr Roman doesn't need to have surgery."
Scrubs
"Subject elongates words when excited."
Scrubs
"Mr Roman, great news!"
Scrubs
"You should've seen him. He was so happy he started dancing in his bed."
Scrubs
"It was sort of, like... From the waist up."
Scrubs
"Oh, this is good."
Scrubs
"I told Elliot a million times that she would be a good chief resident,"
Scrubs
"- Maybe she's racist. - Whatever. It's fine."
Scrubs
"It's not like all my friends are gonna go to Molly for advice."
Scrubs
"When Turk told me he pissed Dr Cox off by stealing his moment,"
Scrubs
"Dr Cox, can you look at my patient's rash? It's weird."
Scrubs
"maybe we could go over some preliminary ideas for your wedding dress."
Scrubs
"I have sketches in my locker."
Scrubs
"Barbie! Listen carefully, because the policy remains unchanged."
Scrubs
"Unless someone is dying, and note, dying, not dead, I'm not interested."
Scrubs
"And PS, a real strong showing for a chief resident candidate."
Scrubs
"God almighty."
Scrubs
"Why would I steal your moment?"
Scrubs
"Except for maybe because payback is a bitch."
Scrubs
"He's starting to look like the break-out character,"
Scrubs
"In my opinion, it is more effective to address the situation"
Scrubs
"Eat that cookie or we'll divorce."
Scrubs
"- Baby, I'm not hungry now. - Eat it."
Scrubs
"3.00's when you announce new chief..."
Scrubs
"Barbie, you're chief resident."
Scrubs
"- Very funny. - So not joking."
Scrubs
"Oh, my God. Now I know how Liza Minnelli felt."
Scrubs
"When she won the Oscar, not when she married that gay pan-faced alien."
Scrubs
"Newbie, how you doin'?"
Scrubs
"Keep it together. It's "be a man" time."
Scrubs
"No, no, I totally understand. Come on. You did what you had to do."
Scrubs
"You went with your gut. Elliot's a great doctor."
Scrubs
"I do have three questions, though."
Scrubs
"Why do you hate me when I show you nothing but love?"
Scrubs
"And what am I supposed to do"
Scrubs
"Yeah, Scarlett, you're chief resident too."
Scrubs
"With her being ridiculously book smart"
Scrubs
"to the point where she has no interpersonal skills"
Scrubs
"and you being cuddly as an un-potty-trained labradoodle"
Scrubs
"and as useful in medical situations as an un-potty-trained labradoodle,"
Scrubs
"together, the two of you make one barely passable doctor..."
Scrubs
"...slash labradoodle."
Scrubs
"So if we'll both be chief residents, why didn't you just say that?"
Scrubs
"John Dorian, Chief Resident."
Scrubs
"Elliot and I doing this together is gonna be a little tough."
Scrubs
"- We're going through a rough patch. - I get that."
Scrubs
"What you need to do is give each other tons of space. Here's your office."
Scrubs
"Well. Enjoy."
Scrubs
"Translation: Don't pass him off to dumb guy."
Scrubs
"You were gathering a group of large orderlies"
Scrubs
"to get the light bulb out by doing what?"
Scrubs
"Of course you did."
Scrubs
"Are you the surgical consult?"
Scrubs
"No. I'm not even working today. I just want to ask him four questions."
Scrubs
"Whazzup?! Dr Tizzurk is in the hizzouse..."
Scrubs
"Conflict is everywhere,"
Scrubs
"whether it's out in the open or bubbling just under the surface."
Scrubs
"Cleaning time! Don't worry, I'll go fast."
Scrubs
"That one got away."
Scrubs
"Elliot, I can hear you."
Scrubs
"This situation would be perfect for my study."
Scrubs
"I'm only using initials. You'll be JD."
Scrubs
"- Johnny. - Of course not."
Scrubs
"We decided to go petty."
Scrubs
"Instead of sharing you, we're gonna separate you into two resident teams"
Scrubs
"so that JD and I never have to see each other."
Scrubs
"Thanks, JD. First pick."
Scrubs
"You're the only one whose name I know."
Scrubs
"- Name's Amy, actually. - John Dorian, Chief Resident."
Scrubs
"Do you want to grab lunch? Or dinner? I'm not sure what time it is."
Scrubs
"Elliot and I weren't the only ones to go petty."
Scrubs
"You know what? I have a barbecue to go to."
Scrubs
"Why don't you meet me there?"
Scrubs
"Cool."
Scrubs
"- Hey, are you Todd? - Oh, yeah."
Scrubs
"- Carla said you're having a barbecue. - No. But stick around."
Scrubs
"I'll see if we can get something cookin'."
Scrubs
"- This is Pat and Frank from 4G. - Hi. I'm Molly."
Scrubs
"Awesome."
Scrubs
"Why don't we just reach up there and tug that bad boy out?"
Scrubs
"and if it breaks, he's going to need surgery, and if you perform it,"
Scrubs
"then he's going to need a casket."
Scrubs
"I thought nobody wanted to take the case."
Scrubs
"Leon's trained to retrieve things."
Scrubs
"Zeltzer, you are the most disturbing man I've ever met in my life."
Scrubs
"Go on, get out. Out, out, out!"
Scrubs
"burning 100 watts, putting out about 130 volts."
Scrubs
"You're helping me."
Scrubs
"Actually, no."
Scrubs
"If I had the time, maybe, but I've got a room to clean."
Scrubs
"Get the lead out, Elvis."
Scrubs
"OK, she's gone."
Scrubs
"Now, I've heard some rumours there's been some fraternising"
Scrubs
"I don't want to mention any names, but, Slobodan, enough of that crap!"
Scrubs
"Watch your ass."
Scrubs
"Carla, Todd has something he wants to say to you."
Scrubs
"I'm sorry if I ever demeaned you."
Scrubs
"My feelings about women were warped"
Scrubs
"We made out once."
Scrubs
"You fixed the Todd?"
Scrubs
"So, you're mad at me."
Scrubs
"Excuse me?"
Scrubs
"You're not mad at me."
Scrubs
"I've never been able to wink."
Scrubs
"Oh. I'm not mad."
Scrubs
"You're stubborn and proud, but you're nice, so eventually you'll tell me."
Scrubs
"No, I won't."
Scrubs
"You kind of harmonised on that. That was cool."
Scrubs
"It's not about the argument anymore."
Scrubs
"The real winner's gonna be who has the guts to apologise first."
Scrubs
"I got something to say!"
Scrubs
"You surgeons ride in on your white horse and save the day."
Scrubs
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