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Clips from Veep - Blurb (S06E06)

"Wait a minute, what was that?"
Veep
"Did I hurt your feelings because I, what..."
Veep
"Oh, ho, ho! So, you did want me to call."
Veep
"Yeah, well, you know what, you can have your trophy wife"
Veep
"but I still got to be president, and, tsk, you never will."
Veep
"Oh! I was looking for you. They're waiting for you to begin."
Veep
"I swear to God, Tom James just wanted to fuck me right now."
Veep
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, ma'am!"
Veep
"That was just a good, old-fashioned hate fuck."
Veep
"and pin my legs behind my head and do me."
Veep
"What the fuck is wrong with you?!"
Veep
"and we walked out onto the stage to accept the nomination,"
Veep
"This is my wife, Alethia."
Veep
"You love me."
Veep
"I...!"
Veep
"the President of the United States."
Veep
"I'd give my left tit for those tits."
Veep
"Hello. Buenas tardes. Good afternoon."
Veep
"who has navigated many crises in her own term,"
Veep
"- President Meyer. - Oh."
Veep
"and I see so many portraits"
Veep
"of... of so many of our great presidents,"
Veep
"perhaps about their not-so-shining moments."
Veep
"And that, um..."
Veep
"is that you have your portrait"
Veep
"Thank you."
Veep
"is the chair that she made love to Andrew on."
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"- I slept in that chair. - And look at my neck."
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"- I'm sorry. - This is John Corbin."
Veep
"I'm afraid we're gonna have to start clearing the room"
Veep
"You know what, this is your fault."
Veep
"Jesus Christ, underage Muslim brides"
Veep
"are less traumatized at their unveiling."
Veep
"I shut down the government for wasting our money."
Veep
"I shut down the government for interfering with our clocks and watches."
Veep
"I shut down the post office because everybody just uses email anyway."
Veep
"and they said this shutdown was a bad idea."
Veep
"- Thank you. - Provocative stuff there"
Veep
"from the bad boy of Washington, Jonah Ryan."
Veep
"Wall Street, meanwhile, has reacted to the shutdown"
Veep
"from the place that matters the most... the beach."
Veep
"- Oof, wish I could join him there. - Oh."
Veep
"Not me."
Veep
"- You suck! - Bye, now."
Veep
""Selina Meyer didn't just shatter the glass ceiling,"
Veep
"so that my daughter and your daughters"
Veep
"will never even know it existed.""
Veep
"- Aw! - Well, that just tickles my twat!"
Veep
"at my portrait unveiling in English?"
Veep
"- And Mike. - See, Mike? That is good writing."
Veep
"- Why can't you write like that? - I'm the first to admit"
Veep
"I'm not the world's greatest speech writer."
Veep
"Ma'am, the White House wants us to finalize your guest list"
Veep
"by the day after... yesterday."
Veep
"So, today. That's a bit of a brain twister."
Veep
"It's a hot ticket."
Veep
"What about Congressman Jonah Ryan?"
Veep
"Ma'am?"
Veep
"- He's your editor. - I know that."
Veep
"Hey, Greg!"
Veep
"- Do you have some bai hao white tip? - I do!"
Veep
"Oh, well, there you go."
Veep
"So, what did you think of the manuscript?"
Veep
"- It's rough, of course, but... - I think it's really interesting."
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"I know, right? Well..."
Veep
"- There's just one little thing. - Sure."
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"- Hanukkah. - Canaan, Rabbi."
Veep
"It's okay, Jonah. Conversion to Judaism"
Veep
"Oh, good, 'cause all this learning is giving me a yarmulke ache."
Veep
"Just to remind everybody that next week,"
Veep
"Sorry, I have to go to the White House. President Meyer's unveiling."
Veep
"and you're not on it."
Veep
"I'm sorry, I can say that now and still get into heaven, right?"
Veep
"Actually, Jonah, Jews don't believe in heaven."
Veep
"Shut the fuck up, Nikhil!"
Veep
"Is there, like, a Jew place for dogs?"
Veep
"All right, Mike, we got 30 days to write a new draft."
Veep
"Get out that diary, pick a day, and let's go."
Veep
"Briefing on infrastructure bill,"
Veep
"We're fucked."
Veep
"I don't even remember any of that."
Veep
"No kidding."
Veep
"I mean, I'm sure that I played with Catherine when she was a child..."
Veep
"but for the life of me, I can't remember one second."
Veep
"- Oh, and there she is. - Hey!"
Veep
"Mom, we had a great wellness check at the doctor's today."
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"- So, is it a boy, is it a girl? - Oh, right."
Veep
"- No. - Mm-mm."
Veep
"We're not doing that."
Veep
"No, Mom, we don't wanna know."
Veep
"Catherine, you are not going to be coy or twee"
Veep
"about the sex of my grandchild."
Veep
"This is a human being you're making,"
Veep
"not some Brooklyn-based, artisanal chocolate bar."
Veep
"Birth gender isn't even that relevant."
Veep
"She/he will decide her/his ideal gender when she/he is/are ready."
Veep
"Okay, is that how we're talking now, Marjorie,"
Veep
"like some sort of bi-curious Porky Pig?"
Veep
"I had an aunt who transitioned twice."
Veep
"She was trapped inside a man, and then that man was trapped inside of another woman."
Veep
"- Oh, like a turducken. - Mm-hmm."
Veep
"We have baby names picked out either way."
Veep
"And for a girl we like Linus."
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"- Seriously? - That feels like child abuse."
Veep
"Can you just go away, Catherine?"
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"That's fine. We're late anyway."
Veep
"Richard has doula class and we're bringing the snacks."
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"- What is happening? - What is happening?"
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"- It just... - Gender is simple!"
Veep
"- Right. - You're a girl, I'm a boy."
Veep
"Well. Hey, what about some of that lezzy stuff?"
Veep
"Catherine's forbidden affair with your Secret Service agent."
Veep
"- I don't mind them. - Ugh."
Veep
"I'll tell you one thing people would flip out about."
Veep
"Seriously. I mean, obviously, we can't do that."
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"- Yeah, you can't do that. - Really? Why can't we?"
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"- You can do that. - I mean, that book would fly off the shelves."
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"- Fly. - People would pay whatever it is a book costs, you know?"
Veep
"And everybody knows that I dated Charlie Baird."
Veep
"Aw, Charlie."
Veep
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