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Clips from Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Captain Peralta (S02E02)

What?

"What?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Oh, crazy flight.

"Oh, crazy flight."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Ah, bonjour, bonjour.

"Ah, bonjour, bonjour."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Two whiskeys, please, Chantelle.

"Two whiskeys, please, Chantelle."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Thanks.

"Thanks."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Do you know Roger Peralta?

"Do you know Roger Peralta?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Yes. Yes, I do.

"Yes. Yes, I do."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

My name's Captain Spike Masters.

"My name's Captain Spike Masters."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

This is outrageous.

"This is outrageous."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

French.

"French."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Copy that, Wanda.

"Copy that, Wanda."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Copy that.

"Copy that."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

But neither do you, sir.

"But neither do you, sir."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

What?

"What?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Here's how we cracked it.

"Here's how we cracked it."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and made these clever T-shirts that say, "#nerdfail."

"and made these clever T-shirts that say, "#nerdfail.""

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

It's hilarious.

"It's hilarious."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You're supposed to have breakfast with your old c.o.

"You're supposed to have breakfast with your old c.o."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

That's crazy.

"That's crazy."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

She's right.

"She's right."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

What? No.

"What? No."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

And I never have.

"And I never have."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

♪ You home of crappy cops ♪

"♪ You home of crappy cops ♪"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Guess who just freed his dad from Canadian prison

"Guess who just freed his dad from Canadian prison"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

sans the juice?

"sans the juice?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

So turns out

"So turns out"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

'cause she found out about his real girlfriend

"'cause she found out about his real girlfriend"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and his other sidepiece.

"and his other sidepiece."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

So yeah.

"So yeah."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Scully. Oh, no.

"Scully. Oh, no."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

When you see my dad walk in,

"When you see my dad walk in,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

No.

"No."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

To Jake's dad!

"To Jake's dad!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I'm sure your dad has a really good reason

"I'm sure your dad has a really good reason"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Don't let him off the hook.

"Don't let him off the hook."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I blamed myself for being born on a peak travel day.

"I blamed myself for being born on a peak travel day."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You were right about him, Boyle.

"You were right about him, Boyle."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You know, you were always my hero,

"You know, you were always my hero,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

who genuinely doesn't care about being a dad.

"who genuinely doesn't care about being a dad."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and until you're ready to be a good one,

"and until you're ready to be a good one,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Also I'm taking your captain hat

"Also I'm taking your captain hat"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

because it's cool, and I want it.

"because it's cool, and I want it."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

figuring out Captain Holt didn't know the answer

"figuring out Captain Holt didn't know the answer"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

you're both asexual nerds

"you're both asexual nerds"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Thanks for bringing that up.

"Thanks for bringing that up."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and you're busy running a precinct,

"and you're busy running a precinct,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Or we can all work together

"Or we can all work together"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and I'm sure we can eventually figure it out.

"and I'm sure we can eventually figure it out."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I like that, Terry. It shows real heart.

"I like that, Terry. It shows real heart."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

But I'm going with Gina's "suck an egg" idea.

"But I'm going with Gina's "suck an egg" idea."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I told you.

"I told you."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

What?

"What?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Come here. Ten-minute hug time.

"Come here. Ten-minute hug time."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I'd rather not.

"I'd rather not."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Fine, only because you're ordering me to.

"Fine, only because you're ordering me to."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Great.

"Great."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Nice job in Quebec.

"Nice job in Quebec."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I bet the local cops weren't happy you showed them up.

"I bet the local cops weren't happy you showed them up."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You did good work.

"You did good work."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Is this an allowance?

"Is this an allowance?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Are you giving me an allowance?

"Are you giving me an allowance?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I'm proud of you.

"I'm proud of you."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Nine minutes start now!

"Nine minutes start now!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Jake, you gotta see this.

"Jake, you gotta see this."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Really?

"Really?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Amy?

"Amy?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I grew a goatee, and it looks amazing,

"I grew a goatee, and it looks amazing,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Of course we can see it, Charles.

"Of course we can see it, Charles."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

It's horrible.

"It's horrible."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

It looks like you unclogged a shower drain

"It looks like you unclogged a shower drain"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

with your mouth.

"with your mouth."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Yeah, you look exactly like the guy

"Yeah, you look exactly like the guy"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Thank you, Captain.

"Thank you, Captain."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

That's right; I call her Bianca

"That's right; I call her Bianca"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

because she's dark and thick

"because she's dark and thick"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

like my first cousin Bianca.

"like my first cousin Bianca."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Say good-bye to Bianca, Boyle.

"Say good-bye to Bianca, Boyle."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

No!

"No!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I want to ask you something,

"I want to ask you something,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I can't promise anything of the sort.

"I can't promise anything of the sort."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

It's about restaurants.

"It's about restaurants."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I'm so glad I didn't make that promise.

"I'm so glad I didn't make that promise."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

when you want to go someplace special?

"when you want to go someplace special?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

that serves "Tál ezer kolbász,"

"that serves "Tál ezer kolbász,""

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and we're going out to dinner tonight.

"and we're going out to dinner tonight."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Why are you going to dinner with him?

"Why are you going to dinner with him?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

He hasn't visited you in six years.

"He hasn't visited you in six years."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Yeah, he's busy. He's an airline pilot.

"Yeah, he's busy. He's an airline pilot."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Regional airline.

"Regional airline."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

He flies internationally.

"He flies internationally."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Quebec to Albany.

"Quebec to Albany."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

What is going on here?

"What is going on here?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

What's your problem with my dad?

"What's your problem with my dad?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

He left you when you were seven,

"He left you when you were seven,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Look, I know he hasn't been the best dad in the past,

"Look, I know he hasn't been the best dad in the past,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

but he's changed.

"but he's changed."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Check it out. We've been texting.

"Check it out. We've been texting."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

No, below that. Oh.

"No, below that. Oh."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

See, he's coming into town just to see me.

"See, he's coming into town just to see me."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

then maybe take a walk through the park,

"then maybe take a walk through the park,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I'm describing a date.

"I'm describing a date."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Joining us for lunch, sir?

"Joining us for lunch, sir?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Oh, no, I've already consumed the required calories

"Oh, no, I've already consumed the required calories"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

for this day period.

"for this day period."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

But I do have some fun lunch chitchat.

"But I do have some fun lunch chitchat."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

used to keep us on our toes

"used to keep us on our toes"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

by have us solve brain teasers.

"by have us solve brain teasers."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Don't just tease my brain, Captain.

"Don't just tease my brain, Captain."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Really go to town on it.

"Really go to town on it."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Yeah, bring it on, sir.

"Yeah, bring it on, sir."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I love puzzles.

"I love puzzles."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You must figure out which.

"You must figure out which."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

It's unimportant.

"It's unimportant."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

It's a land of Tyreses.

"It's a land of Tyreses."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Sure.

"Sure."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The island has no scales,

"The island has no scales,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The exciting catch:

"The exciting catch:"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You can only use it three times.

"You can only use it three times."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

That sounds super exciting.

"That sounds super exciting."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Oh, I hope so. Please say yes.

"Oh, I hope so. Please say yes."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

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