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Clips from King of the Hill - The Bluegrass Is Always Greener (S06E06)

"[screaming]"
King of the Hill
"Please, Lord, give her a cramp. If it's thy will."
King of the Hill
"[violin playing]"
King of the Hill
"Oh."
King of the Hill
"We're low on beer."
King of the Hill
"[singing]"
King of the Hill
"Bill, do you have any idea what that song is about?"
King of the Hill
"[van approaching]"
King of the Hill
"[scoffs]"
King of the Hill
"How do you get into the Van Cliburn Summer Orchestra?"
King of the Hill
"We share a birthday."
King of the Hill
"-rarely amount to anything. -lnteresting fact."
King of the Hill
"Connie and I always had a dream of playing Carnegie Hall..."
King of the Hill
"And then she'd close with a violin concerto for the bluehairs."
King of the Hill
"Okay! Very good. Much better."
King of the Hill
"-Thanks, Dad. -Sure, yeah, yeah, no problem."
King of the Hill
"But you only one who will know what it really mean."
King of the Hill
"[music playing]"
King of the Hill
"Eh?"
King of the Hill
"-I'll get my guitar. -I'll get my washboard."
King of the Hill
"I'll go get my string bass, which is really a keyboard."
King of the Hill
"No, I'll go with the banjo, man."
King of the Hill
"Bobby, put that down. That's the jug I keep stuff in."
King of the Hill
"Oh!"
King of the Hill
"No, no. It's my fault, Connie. I told you to saw."
King of the Hill
"I used to judge them till they found out I was taking bribes."
King of the Hill
"Okay."
King of the Hill
"Stop! Kahn Jr.!"
King of the Hill
"[screaming]"
King of the Hill
"Not hay wagon to Hee Haw!Time to pack!"
King of the Hill
"Come on, Dale. You don't need two suitcases."
King of the Hill
"Bobby, I can't baby-sit you and Bill. And he's in the band."
King of the Hill
"and he's a stepping stone to my comedy-writing future."
King of the Hill
"[sighing] All right."
King of the Hill
"[honking horn]"
King of the Hill
"-We'll be careful. -What do I care?"
King of the Hill
"and noticing that it is different from Russia."
King of the Hill
"Yeah. And when Yakov says ""l reckon"" and ""y'all"" in his accent..."
King of the Hill
"[laughing]"
King of the Hill
"Oh, this joke will kill. You wanna hear it?"
King of the Hill
"-Fiddle contest! -And to have fun!"
King of the Hill
"I mean, even in math camp we played chess."
King of the Hill
"Yes, yes, we're going to have fun. But you know what's not fun?"
King of the Hill
"No turning back now."
King of the Hill
"Hey, it's 4:50."
King of the Hill
"[all cheering]"
King of the Hill
"Well, maybe you can get Yakov to write you an autograph."
King of the Hill
"Where do we put the gift?"
King of the Hill
"And when she come home from audition, we'll scream at her..."
King of the Hill
"""Bill Monroe""? ""The Foggy Mountain Boys""?"
King of the Hill
"Connie's in Branson!"
King of the Hill
"Mel Tillis is teaching me English."
King of the Hill
"It's taking a lot longer than I expected."
King of the Hill
"[laughing]"
King of the Hill
"I've written an ""in America and in Russia"" joke for you..."
King of the Hill
"[screaming]"
King of the Hill
"I called them during the Statue of Liberty dance number."
King of the Hill
"(womai) Security, we have a situatioi ii the lobby,"
King of the Hill
"He should be the center square. I'm so sick of Whoopi."
King of the Hill
"Where have you guys been?"
King of the Hill
"Dad, I sold my joke to Yakov! I'm a professional comedy writer!"
King of the Hill
"-The Dale Gribble Bluegrass Experience? -Yo, man."
King of the Hill
"One holds the fiddle while the other holds the bow. They're good."
King of the Hill
"Oh, God. Well, this is it, Connie."
King of the Hill
"I don't want to be a professional bluegrass musician. I quit."
King of the Hill
"And I quit, too, even though I'm not in the band!"
King of the Hill
"Well, I saw that coming."
King of the Hill
"[sighing]"
King of the Hill
"I'm a jackass."
King of the Hill
"Stop stating the obvious! Where is my daughter?"
King of the Hill
"I'm sure she's fine. She's with Bobby."
King of the Hill
"Now all we have to do is check every free buffet in town."
King of the Hill
"Run away to the Appalachian Mountains and play bluegrass all day long..."
King of the Hill
"And I can wear overalls with no shirt and tell jokes..."
King of the Hill
"Well, actually, you're too late, but her other final wish was that..."
King of the Hill
"you would play with us her favorite song on that stage now."
King of the Hill
"Tell them I'll play till my fiddle catches fire."
King of the Hill
"Well, I could go for either, but it's up to you."
King of the Hill
"Bobby, we are gonna be in Appalachia by sundown."
King of the Hill
"Why do we do it, Kahn? Why do we push Connie so hard?"
King of the Hill
"[snorts]"
King of the Hill
"Say that again and I'll pop you in the chops."
King of the Hill
"-Oh, yeah? -Yeah."
King of the Hill
"""ln America, they put 'ln God We Trust' on the money."
King of the Hill
"[laughing] That's funny. I hate Russia."
King of the Hill
"Oh, damn you, Hank Hill! I can't get that song out of my head."
King of the Hill
"[Kahn yells]"
King of the Hill
"She's playing on the streets for lousy tourists!"
King of the Hill
"Connie Souphanousinphone, everyone!"
King of the Hill
"She's only 13!"
King of the Hill
"Help, Charlie! Help, somebody!"
King of the Hill
"[humming]"
King of the Hill
"I'm gonna grab that violin from Connie and smash it against a fire hydrant."
King of the Hill
"Bill, she started four-and-a-half beers ago. She can't possibly go on much longer."
King of the Hill
"[violin playing]"
King of the Hill
"What you doing, Hank?"
King of the Hill
"I want to hear Puff, the Magic Dragoi,"
King of the Hill
"Play that one. I like it. Play it."
King of the Hill
"[singing]"
King of the Hill
"Party's over, Hank. It's the music police, a.k.a. Little Miss Bummer."
King of the Hill
"Don't stop. I like it."
King of the Hill
"The only time I heard music like that was at Disney World..."
King of the Hill
"when we passed the Country Bear Jamboree."
King of the Hill
"But my dad pushed me into the Hall of Presidents."
King of the Hill
"-Could you play it again? -Well, sure."
King of the Hill
"Wow! This violin did that?"
King of the Hill
"When you're playing bluegrass, you call it a fiddle, Connie."
King of the Hill
"[laughing]"
King of the Hill
"Violin."
King of the Hill
"[gasping]"
King of the Hill
"I gotta go. My dad has this joke."
King of the Hill
"Practice."
King of the Hill
"Who's Van Cliburn?"
King of the Hill
"Texas' own Van Cliburn is a classical pianist..."
King of the Hill
"Everybody in the alley thought so."
King of the Hill
"And you know Boomhauer is a music snob."
King of the Hill
"Well, the strange thing is people with that much talent..."
King of the Hill
"to showcase our talents."
King of the Hill
"But I think fiddling could take Connie even further than Carnegie Hall."
King of the Hill
"That's if she grows up pretty enough."
King of the Hill
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