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Clips from Bruno (2009)

"-Do it! Do it! -Head and eyes straight forward, candidate."
Bruno (2009)
"and so I was just trying to break it up with some simple horizontal lines."
Bruno (2009)
"Do you have an attitude, candidate? Do we detect an attitude?"
Bruno (2009)
"-Sir, she's got an attitude. -What?"
Bruno (2009)
"Sir Officer Candidate, did you just call me "she"?"
Bruno (2009)
"What type belt is that, candidate?"
Bruno (2009)
"What is that?"
Bruno (2009)
"-D&G. -What is D&G?"
Bruno (2009)
"-"Hello"? -"Hello"?"
Bruno (2009)
"Sir Officer Candidate, you deserve a medal for exceptional skin."
Bruno (2009)
"-Did you use profanity again? -Did you use profanity?"
Bruno (2009)
"But you're being really nasty."
Bruno (2009)
"The OC guide states that I will not use profanity while I'm at OCS."
Bruno (2009)
"Yes, mein F¸hrer. Yes, Officer Candidate."
Bruno (2009)
"-Yeah, this is mine. -You better help your buddy."
Bruno (2009)
"-Hurry up! Hurry up! -Move over there!"
Bruno (2009)
"-That's not a salute. -That's not a salute."
Bruno (2009)
"That's not a salute."
Bruno (2009)
"Can I tell you about the person that changed my life?"
Bruno (2009)
"Was it Karl Lagerfeld?"
Bruno (2009)
"No, actually, his name is Jesus. Jesus is in this room right now."
Bruno (2009)
"He never leaves us. He never forsakes us. He's here."
Bruno (2009)
"Amazing."
Bruno (2009)
"That's exactly right. He's amazing."
Bruno (2009)
"You want to be famous. You'll be one that's so famous, Bruno,"
Bruno (2009)
"who want to come out of the homosexual lifestyle and make a change in their lives."
Bruno (2009)
"And they'll say, "If Bruno can do it, then I can do it."
Bruno (2009)
"And they'll say, "It's Jesus. He changed me.""
Bruno (2009)
"Are you hitting on me?"
Bruno (2009)
"Okay, good, 'cause I just... That was, like, really hot, that whole speech."
Bruno (2009)
"Are there any outdoor activities"
Bruno (2009)
"that I should do if I want to become straight?"
Bruno (2009)
"-I'm Donny. -Bruno."
Bruno (2009)
"Robert."
Bruno (2009)
"The women, eh? Do you prefer the vagina or the mammary glands?"
Bruno (2009)
"-I prefer the vagina. -Me, too."
Bruno (2009)
"I love a woman with a vagina."
Bruno (2009)
"Yeah."
Bruno (2009)
"My favourite."
Bruno (2009)
"It's my favourite."
Bruno (2009)
"Look at the 4 of us. We are so like the Sex and the City girls."
Bruno (2009)
"That is such a Samantha thing to say."
Bruno (2009)
"You haven't? How's it feel?"
Bruno (2009)
"You probably ain't the only one."
Bruno (2009)
"There's so many stars in the sky."
Bruno (2009)
"Full of them."
Bruno (2009)
"Do we all share one tent or what's more sensible?"
Bruno (2009)
"I hope not."
Bruno (2009)
"Reverend BJ found me too much of a handful"
Bruno (2009)
"and put me in touch with one of his chums."
Bruno (2009)
"Look like a straight guy, how's that?"
Bruno (2009)
"Women are good for us."
Bruno (2009)
"They're good even though"
Bruno (2009)
"-Right. -But we need that."
Bruno (2009)
"that, at first glance, are annoying and irritating."
Bruno (2009)
"And women often don't stick to the point."
Bruno (2009)
"and they never get back to the first point maybe ever."
Bruno (2009)
"I am repulsed by the idea of making the sex with a woman."
Bruno (2009)
"The important thing is to be around women,"
Bruno (2009)
"somewhat, that you find tolerable or interesting"
Bruno (2009)
"and give them a chance to seduce you."
Bruno (2009)
"How did you get into it?"
Bruno (2009)
"We, actually, our first time was on our..."
Bruno (2009)
"Of all nights for us to swing, the first time was for our honeymoon."
Bruno (2009)
"Und what is your favourite position?"
Bruno (2009)
"Show me. I'll pretend to be the woman."
Bruno (2009)
"Yeah, and so, if I'm the woman... Don't worry. Yeah, so what?"
Bruno (2009)
"-and that's called reverse cowgirl. -Right. Right."
Bruno (2009)
"This one here is cowgirl or reverse cowgirl?"
Bruno (2009)
"This is cowgirl."
Bruno (2009)
"Und what other positions are there?"
Bruno (2009)
"69."
Bruno (2009)
"But this is the girl's position."
Bruno (2009)
"You don't want to be like this if you're a guy."
Bruno (2009)
"There's missionary, doggy style."
Bruno (2009)
"So what's doggy style like?"
Bruno (2009)
"Yeah. Like that?"
Bruno (2009)
"All right, and then what would you be doing?"
Bruno (2009)
"If you was a woman, I would be humping you."
Bruno (2009)
"-No, show me. -I'm not gonna show you."
Bruno (2009)
"-You're a man. -Don't be a faggot."
Bruno (2009)
"Come on. What's the big deal? It's just a couple of guys."
Bruno (2009)
"I can't wait to do this to a woman."
Bruno (2009)
"Anybody want a sandwich or something?"
Bruno (2009)
"Very good. You've got great hair actually."
Bruno (2009)
"-Thank you. -Yeah."
Bruno (2009)
"-Oh, yeah. -Good boy."
Bruno (2009)
"Come on, Jack, look me in the eyes."
Bruno (2009)
"Dude."
Bruno (2009)
"Why would he look you in the eyes when he's looking at a pussy?"
Bruno (2009)
"-Why would he look you in the eyes? -No, no. Just for concentration."
Bruno (2009)
"-He does not look in a guy's... -I don't need you for concentration, okay?"
Bruno (2009)
"-No, I want... -Then quit fucking touching me"
Bruno (2009)
"and quit telling me to look at you in the eye. Okay?"
Bruno (2009)
"I didn't come here for no fucking queer shit. Okay?"
Bruno (2009)
"-Me, neither. -Okay."
Bruno (2009)
"-Let's keep it at that then. -Cool."
Bruno (2009)
"This is a fucking swingers party. Right, guys?"
Bruno (2009)
"I see what the fuck you're doing, dude."
Bruno (2009)
"-Hi. -Did he not try to pull"
Bruno (2009)
"-that queer shit on you out there? -Hi. How you doing?"
Bruno (2009)
"I don't need this motherfucker touching me on the back,"
Bruno (2009)
"-I was just going to the kitchen. -I know, yeah. Come on."
Bruno (2009)
"What's this shit? Let's take this off."
Bruno (2009)
"Let's maybe we get to know each other a little."
Bruno (2009)
"-I think you broke that, actually. -I don't give a fuck."
Bruno (2009)
"Yeah, there is... Let's get to know each other a little bit first."
Bruno (2009)
"Know each other? What?"
Bruno (2009)
"You must produce a lot of milk."
Bruno (2009)
"I don't want you to do something that you'll regret."
Bruno (2009)
"You wake up tomorrow, you've lost your virginity, and you feel ashamed."
Bruno (2009)
"You know, let's take this a little slower."
Bruno (2009)
"No, let's do this the right way."
Bruno (2009)
"I go, and I sit down with your father, we talk about this."
Bruno (2009)
"Would you quit being a little bitch here"
Bruno (2009)
"and take your little briefs off before I fucking rip them?"
Bruno (2009)
"-Yeah. -Fine."
Bruno (2009)
"I don't like this little shit."
Bruno (2009)
"You gotta fold that neatly. You don't treat suede like that. It stains."
Bruno (2009)
"Sit the fuck down. Take it off!"
Bruno (2009)
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