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Clips from Bruno (2009)

"I am the host of Funkyzeit,"
Bruno (2009)
"apart from Germany."
Bruno (2009)
"Funkyzeit is uber influential."
Bruno (2009)
"In fact, Austrian fashionistas live their lives according to my "In or Out" list."
Bruno (2009)
"mit everyone in the Euro-fashion world."
Bruno (2009)
"Can you look into this camera and just say,"
Bruno (2009)
""You're watching Funkyzeit mit Bruno"?"
Bruno (2009)
"Yeah, that's cool. Can you do it, like, even more like a kind of black guy?"
Bruno (2009)
"But it's the hardest job in the world, isn't it?"
Bruno (2009)
"to put your right leg forward and then put your left leg forward"
Bruno (2009)
"Yeah, that is good."
Bruno (2009)
"Bruno has known true love twice in his life."
Bruno (2009)
"mit a pygmy flight attendant called Diesel."
Bruno (2009)
"This is a prototype. It's a Velcro suit made by Frederic Worms."
Bruno (2009)
"Pretty cool, right?"
Bruno (2009)
"It is. I was looking at it, and can I have one?"
Bruno (2009)
"-Well, it's a prototype. It's a one-off. -Okay."
Bruno (2009)
"We'll get out, but don't push me."
Bruno (2009)
"-You go out now. -Yeah."
Bruno (2009)
"Yeah, wait a second."
Bruno (2009)
"Bruno was aus."
Bruno (2009)
"-No. -Okay."
Bruno (2009)
"-I'm on the front row. -I don't think so."
Bruno (2009)
"Hello?"
Bruno (2009)
"...ich was fired from Funkyzeit."
Bruno (2009)
"Ich was going to be the biggest Austrian superstar since Hitler."
Bruno (2009)
"Diesel, I love you. Diesel."
Bruno (2009)
"und cunningly avoided being snapped by the waiting paparazzi."
Bruno (2009)
"the biggest gay movie star since Schwarzenegger."
Bruno (2009)
"Maximum Santzgaut!"
Bruno (2009)
"Also, ich headed to my first meeting mit a Hollywood uber agent."
Bruno (2009)
"You're here because you are looking to do feature films."
Bruno (2009)
"I wanna be a star."
Bruno (2009)
"-In? -In a huge Hollywood movie."
Bruno (2009)
"-Background. -Action."
Bruno (2009)
"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,"
Bruno (2009)
"has served our municipality for more than 12 years as city controller."
Bruno (2009)
"-Less. Okay. -Yeah."
Bruno (2009)
"I'm afraid it gives me no pleasure at all to speak to you this afternoon."
Bruno (2009)
"-Okay. -Thank you."
Bruno (2009)
"-Should we just go again? -Okay."
Bruno (2009)
"As you know, the defendant"
Bruno (2009)
"but the team that do it were booked up for the next 4 days"
Bruno (2009)
"They say that after a waxing, there's enough to stuff a mattress."
Bruno (2009)
"All right. I think, guys, we're finished."
Bruno (2009)
"Once again, "Can you take my finger, your finger out of my ass,""
Bruno (2009)
"is what the guy just said on the phone."
Bruno (2009)
"Play it back. Talking about what? His asshole."
Bruno (2009)
"-Hi. How are you? -Hi."
Bruno (2009)
"Yeah, if you sit here."
Bruno (2009)
"Also, so tell me about your humanitarian work."
Bruno (2009)
"Yes, yes, I understand. But I was thinking..."
Bruno (2009)
"Okay, but... Okay. Okay."
Bruno (2009)
"Yes. Thank you."
Bruno (2009)
"Reese Witterspinzel?"
Bruno (2009)
"Me und Lloyd, we haven't actually spoke since the other day"
Bruno (2009)
"when I was getting my anus bleached."
Bruno (2009)
"-We won't go there. Yeah. -That was a very"
Bruno (2009)
"And it's very important what scores you give it,"
Bruno (2009)
"because if the show scores over an 85%,,"
Bruno (2009)
"-It's totally great. -Okay."
Bruno (2009)
"Okay, let's see what she's got in her stomach."
Bruno (2009)
"and the ears, like, have not been developed yet."
Bruno (2009)
"That's right. It's the time you've all been waiting for."
Bruno (2009)
"What's that?"
Bruno (2009)
"Bruno!"
Bruno (2009)
"The last bit was? Lloyd's?"
Bruno (2009)
"Well, there's always 2. There's always 2."
Bruno (2009)
"You'd have to borrow the needles from me."
Bruno (2009)
"Lloyd, we need to distract him"
Bruno (2009)
"No logical person would consider a show like this"
Bruno (2009)
"Oh, my God."
Bruno (2009)
"Well, I don't even know because it's pretty conventional."
Bruno (2009)
"But the message is not ordinary."
Bruno (2009)
"Sure."
Bruno (2009)
"There's no ice bucket, but I know a good place to put it."
Bruno (2009)
"Do you want some strawberries"
Bruno (2009)
"Ich decided to seek advice from the wisest guy I'd ever known."
Bruno (2009)
"He says he's in a place with green trees and flowers."
Bruno (2009)
"There's something that he could do that could make me incredibly happy."
Bruno (2009)
"Well, I'm really into issues."
Bruno (2009)
"Now, I think that would be... That's something to get involved now,"
Bruno (2009)
"so, we can just help ease the..."
Bruno (2009)
"In order for everyone... It's just a beneficial thing to be involved with now."
Bruno (2009)
"-Okay. -Is that still cool or..."
Bruno (2009)
"-I don't know, like elephants or something. -And then make bracelets?"
Bruno (2009)
"-Save what? -Save Dafar."
Bruno (2009)
"Is that in, like, Iraqi or something like that?"
Bruno (2009)
"Yeah, that's in the... It's in... Yeah."
Bruno (2009)
"Yeah."
Bruno (2009)
"Is there anywhere in the world that no celebrity has tried to fix?"
Bruno (2009)
"But which one?"
Bruno (2009)
"Sting's got the Amazon, and Bono's got AIDS."
Bruno (2009)
"the Middle-earth."
Bruno (2009)
"Lutz! Lutz! Start the car!"
Bruno (2009)
"Lutz!"
Bruno (2009)
"Hummus has nothing to do with Hamas. It's a food. Okay? We eat it. They eat it."
Bruno (2009)
"Well, do you both agree on that?"
Bruno (2009)
"We both agree that hummus is very healthy."
Bruno (2009)
"Let's try and get a solution, right?"
Bruno (2009)
"agree to give the pyramids back to the Israelis?"
Bruno (2009)
"This is in Egypt. Not in Palestine."
Bruno (2009)
"that I hope is gonna bring you two together"
Bruno (2009)
"Ich bin Bruno, dove of peace"
Bruno (2009)
"-To the whole world? -Yeah."
Bruno (2009)
"So what, the whole world gets to see"
Bruno (2009)
"I am going to say something that is gonna get you so angry"
Bruno (2009)
"Your hair is sun damaged."
Bruno (2009)
"Lose the beards, because your King Osama"
Bruno (2009)
"Mein little afrikanischer Freund was going to get me"
Bruno (2009)
"Also, ich hired a top photographer"
Bruno (2009)
"Why not? Come on. Whatever."
Bruno (2009)
"Fine. Yeah, I don't mind her being up on a crucifix."
Bruno (2009)
"her mixing the pots of acid and that type..."
Bruno (2009)
"A little sensitive subject here. How much does she weigh?"
Bruno (2009)
"Great. Fantastisch news."
Bruno (2009)
"O.J., you're going to be on television."
Bruno (2009)
"Welcome back to Today with Richard Bey."
Bruno (2009)
"Now, our next guest is a single parent. Please welcome Bruno."
Bruno (2009)
"I'm from Austria."
Bruno (2009)
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