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Clips from The Simpsons - Bart on the Road (S07E07)

"We're having the best spring break of our lives, and we don't need you around nerding it up."
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"That job is taken."
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"But surely I and my $600..."
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"could play some small part in your vacation fun."
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"Like there's any way to get some kicks with a big wad of cash and a license to drive-"
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"Wow.!"
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"Ooh, boy, Flipsy!"
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"You and I are going on a road trip. Whoa!"
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"Gentlemen, for our road trip, I have taken the liberty..."
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"for use on our parents."
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"I've been selected to represent the school..."
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"at the National Grammar Rodeo..."
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"at the Sheraton Hotel in Canada."
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"at the National Grammar Rodeo at the Sheraton Hotel in Canada."
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"I'm going away for a week. See ya.!"
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"Nah."
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"The National Grammar Rodeo?"
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"I wish I were going. Oh, wait, wait."
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"I mean, I wish I was going."
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"- Is that right, Bart? - Mm-mmm-mmm."
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"It's not fair! I'm the best student in school."
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"How come I never heard about this competition?"
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"Maybe because you are, as we say in Latin, a "dorkus malorkus. ""
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"That's not Latin. Mom, Bart's faking it!"
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"Oh, honey, you've had your glory. Now it's Bart's turn."
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"Oh.! Oh.! Now, wait.!"
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"Oh! Yeah. Wait. Oh. Wait! Oh, oh!"
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"Ow! Bart! Nelson hit me!"
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"He sure did."
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"A cup holder!"
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"Nelson, good to see ya. Martin, always a pleasure."
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"Oh.! Diablo Canyon 2..."
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"why can't you be more like Diablo Canyon 1?"
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"Hello?"
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"Oh! Homie, hello!"
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"I can't remember the last time you called me from-"
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"Hi, Lisa. How's your spring break going?"
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"I'm learning about owls."
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"Oh, owls, eh?"
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"Sure, I would. I can always learn about owls this summer at bird camp."
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"Oh!"
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"We've arrived in the vast cornfields of Canada!"
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"How much farther to the grammar rodeo?"
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"Grammar rodeo? We're going to a grammar rodeo?"
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"We're not going to a grammar rodeo."
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"- That was just an alibi, Milton. - Martin."
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"- Martin. - Fellows?"
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"- What? - Where are we going?"
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"Well, I realize it's trite..."
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"but we could tour the bridges of Madison County."
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"Hey! Who has better vacation ideas than Triple-A?"
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"According to the publisher of this Triple-A guidebook, no one."
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"I've always wanted to see Macon, Georgia."
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"Wait. How about a fair?"
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"Not just a county fair, not just a Europe fair..."
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"but a world's fair!"
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"- The World's Fair in Knoxville, Tennessee. - Keep reading."
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"and the fair's symbol is the sun sphere..."
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"which sits atop a 266-foot-tall steel shaft."
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"- What's inside? - An information desk!"
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"Cool!"
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"So, it's a choice between Disney World and Knoxville."
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"- Knoxville, Knoxville, Knoxville! - I concur."
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"You made it!"
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"- Did you have trouble getting past the security guards? - Security guards?"
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"- Great! You want to get some lunch? - Sure."
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"The way I figure it..."
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"if the candy stays in the machine for more than a year, it's up for grabs."
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"Why do you need me?"
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"- Ready? - Ready."
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"- Whoo-hoo! - Whoo-hoo!"
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"Zagnut bar, Mr. Smithers? Razzles, Skittles, Whatchamacallits, Twizzlers?"
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"They all have hilarious names and are delicious."
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"Well, I am partial toJolly Ranchers."
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"Mmm. Good work, Simpson."
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"Boy, Lisa, with you here, this hardly seems like work at all."
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"I don't know how I'm gonna make it through my night shift without you."
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"- We could have a slumber party. - Oh, that'd be great!"
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"It'll be just like the time they kicked me out of the sporting goods store."
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"I'm gonna turn this car around..."
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"and there'll be no Cape Canaveral for anybody.!"
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"Bart, can we weigh the car at that weigh station?"
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"Yeah."
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"Bart, can we pick up that hitchhiker?"
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"- Bart, could we stop for ice cream? - Yes."
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"Well, I didn't think I was rehabilitated, but, uh..."
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"I guess they needed the extra bed."
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"With Bart gone, and now you and your father, I'm not gonna have anyone to-"
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"What is this place?"
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"Branson, Missouri. My dad says it's like Vegas if it were run by Ned Flanders."
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"Andy Williams!"
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"We don't need to stop here."
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"Yes, we do!"
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"Wow!"
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"but then, bam- second encore."
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"Okay. Time for truth or dare. You go first."
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"Eh, truth. Ask me anything."
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"Who do you love most- me, Bart or Maggie?"
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"D'oh! All right. Dare."
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"Okay. Why don't you-"
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"Hello. I'd like to speak with a Mr. Snotball..."
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"first name "Youra. ""
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"- Youra Snotball? - What? How dare you!"
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"If I find out who this is, I'll staple a flag to your butt and mail you to Iran!"
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"- Dad! - I- I won't tell anybody."
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"Dad, you tell everybody everything. Even Moe knew when I threw up on the dentist."
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"Just give me another chance, and I'll prove I can keep your secret."
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"Okay."
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"I like... Langdon Alger."
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"I have no idea who that is."
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"Nobody does. He's very quiet and enjoys puzzles."
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"But that still doesn't mean you can tell anyone."
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"I've already forgotten his name."
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"It was Larson something, right?"
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"Thanks, Dad."
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"Oh, this has been the best spring break ever!"
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"And with my patented seminar..."
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"you will learn how to corner the real estate market through hypnosis."
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"Why waste your hypnotic powers on neighbors and coworkers?"
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"I can't take this anymore."
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