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Clips from The Good Place - Existential Crisis (S02E02)

"Gotta go grab some Camus."
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"Hey, buddy."
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"Can I get you a snack?"
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"What do you eat? Babies?"
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"Do you want me to get you a big fat baby?"
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"What flavor baby?"
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"How about a Cool Ranch baby?"
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"Searching for meaning is philosophical suicide."
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"How does anyone do anything..."
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"when you understand the fleeting nature of existence?"
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"It's pretty easy, man."
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"and it's just not that big of a deal."
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"baby,"
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"Do you know what that means?"
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"Well, sometimes when a dog"
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"is very old,"
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"like, five or six or something,"
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"he crosses a long rainbow bridge,"
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"is a beautiful farm with lots of grass and trees"
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"and a rainbow."
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"The point is:"
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"that's where Max is."
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"Nope, because it's very far away..."
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"in... Guam."
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"- It's in Guam. - Can we at least..."
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"Okay, look. I'm lying, okay?"
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"You caught me. Congratulations."
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"The farm is made up."
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"The bridge is made up."
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"There's no such place as Guam."
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"Your dog, Max, is dead"
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"How did he die?"
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"how hot it gets in cars sometimes."
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"The point is: don't be sad."
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"and that bitch Carol from work was really"
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"that I don't even know what it was."
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"I had to use one of my favorite duffle bags"
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"by bringing Mommy another bottle of white."
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"So I simply did myself."
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"Everything is perfect."
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"Red alert, red alert. We need help."
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"Uh-oh. I know that look."
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"Mike, listen to me, you have nothing to worry about."
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"You still have around 70% of your brain left."
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"No, no, this is more like a philosophy overdose."
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"Look at how pretty the restaurant is."
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"Parties are mere distractions"
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"from the relentlessness of entropy."
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"We're all just corpses who haven't yet begun to decay."
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"Yeah, but..."
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"he's a catatonic blob."
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"Or you could just sit tight."
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"The entire party are going to be heading over here soon."
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"I was sorely mistaken."
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"Okay, bud, whatever is going on right now,"
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"just shove your feelings way down deep,"
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"started talking about their kids."
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"Hey, welcome, guys."
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"So the theme of the party is "animals.""
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"Flying station's over there if you want to fly"
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"That's fun."
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"Oh, and have you ever wanted to sit in a kangaroo pouch?"
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"My whole dang life."
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"and then we can head over to your party... sound good?"
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"Yo, this place is lit."
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"I'm going to go jump in that kangie's pouch."
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"Great, just like that. Perfect."
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"Where's Michael?"
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"Uh... I think I found him."
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"There they are!"
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"Que pasa, muchachos?"
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"Hey there, bud. You okay?"
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"Okay? I'm a new man."
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"She's a lot like Janet,"
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"but she doesn't pretend like she has all the answers."
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"Hi, Jeanette."
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"Oh, no, it's still me... Janet."
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"Michael just asked that I change my appearance,"
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"and now it's just so easy."
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"Babe, we need to get some food into you."
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"She's perfect."
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"Hey! Turn that around."
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"It did kind of hurt actually, but I love it."
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"So he's moved on from existential crisis"
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"That's good, right?"
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"It's Chinese for "Japan.""
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"Oh, so cool."
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"No, no. This is worse."
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"I mean, an existential crisis is an acknowledgement"
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"needs to be confronted, but this is just denial."
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"and he'll be a mess."
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"For an immortal being, he's pretty fragile."
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"his grip on reality?"
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"You didn't have to come."
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"I said I'm fine."
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"but still. It's hard..."
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"Oh, and who is this tall drink of wine?"
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"It's my ex-husband's funeral."
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"Thanks for blowing my cover, Doug!"
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"Listen, baby. Don't be sad, okay?"
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"Your father wasn't great."
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"Let's call him what he was:"
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"a fart in the shape of a man."
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"Can you just chill?"
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"I don't want to turn Dad's funeral into a roast."
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"I mean, the only photo they could get of him"
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"was a mug shot. He was a doof."
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"So don't be sad that he's gone."
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"I'm not sad. I'm fine."
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"You know, I had a long running bet"
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"Well, we're at his funeral. It's pretty clear..."
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"Is there a bar? I'm just going to..."
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"Yes, she did."
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"Thanks so much for coming to Gunnar's birthday party."
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"Now, there was a little bit of a mix up,"
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"over at the restaurant. So..."
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"why don't we all head over there?"
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"No need. This party is far superior."
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"I'm sure yours is amazing."
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"Well, I did fine on the décor,"
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