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Clips from The Simpsons - A Midsummer's Nice Dream (S22E22)

"Oh, man. I got to get rid of my grass."
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"The Regional Lampoon."
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"Fro And Flo."
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"Thank you."
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"Dave's not here!"
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"Say the line, man."
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"They already know the line."
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"What are you doing, man?!"
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"Homie, you know all the bits."
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"and seen you through some very square times."
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"Help him."
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"It's not made of weed."
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"Can we get high from the fumes?"
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"We can. It'll be great."
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"Like a reality show without the cameras."
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"♪ ♪"
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"Thank you for clearing the clutter from my house"
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"Ooh, a pen from the Milwaukee Hilton!"
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"All of J.D. Salinger's books,"
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"Used pizza protectors!"
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"She's crazy, but I'd do her."
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"♪ Someone I can pass to ♪"
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"♪ Someone to hit the open man on the give-and-go ♪"
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"♪ So, cheerleaders, help me out ♪"
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"♪ Basketball Jones ♪"
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"♪ Oh, that sounds so sweet ♪"
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"♪ I got a Basketball... ♪"
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"That's a movie sniff."
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"This is live theater."
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"I can't believe the crazy house would throw out all these forks."
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"Give me!"
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"T'was not I that players did disturb."
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"Why does everything have to have an "ometer" on it?"
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"And what is rain, man?"
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"It's like we're in the apartment under God"
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"and his fat sister overflowed the tub."
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"The duo's herbal ha-has led to a series"
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"of successful albums, concerts, movies and Nash Bridges."
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"Now these homegrown heroes will kick off their summer tour"
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"at Squidport's new amphitheatre,"
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"the Clamphitheater, the $800 million boondoggle"
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"based on nothing more than a cute play on words."
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"Who the hell are Cheech and Chong?"
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"Bart, Cheech and Chong"
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"were the Beavis and Butthead of their day."
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"Who are Beavis and Butthead?"
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"I've failed as a parent."
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"I swore the day my son was born"
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"he would appreciate stoner comedy."
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"To the media room!"
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"Open up. It's the police."
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"He's flushing his pot down the toilet... unnecessarily!"
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"Back then, we'd play these albums again and again"
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"till they were filled with skips and clicks and pops."
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"Which was about three times."
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"These are comedy albums?"
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"The Upside-Down Bubblegum Collective."
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"The Plymouth Grok Experiment."
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"Allan Sherman's Helter Shmelter."
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"What are you guys doing up there?"
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"Hide the dope!"
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"We don't have any dope."
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"Then, what did I just smoke?"
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"Lou, I want you to confiscate these brownies."
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"There's no drugs in these brownies."
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"I said "confiscate"!"
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"Uh, also confiscate me a T-shirt, uh triple-XL."
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"I thought you said double-XL was a real wake-up call."
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"That was for pants."
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"Ladies and gentlemen, Krusty the Clown."
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"When they asked me to introduce Cheech and Chong,"
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"I said, "How much?""
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"And they said, "We don't pay for introductions,""
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"so I said, "Then I don't need this crummy gig.""
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"And they said, "Yes, you do," and I said..."
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""Ladies and gentlemen, Cheech and Chong!""
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"Who is it? It's me, Dave, man."
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"Open up. I got the stuff."
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"I thought they'd do bits,"
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"but their most famous bit?"
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"Will you open up? I got the stuff with me."
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"Ooh, he's gonna say "Dave's not here.""
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"Dave's not here! Dave's not here!"
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"Dave's not here!"
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"What's the surprise?"
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"What's the point?"
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"The point is they still give us"
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"a shoebox full of 20s to do this."
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"Now, say it."
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"Dave's not..."
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"Dave's not gonna sell out anymore, man."
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"I-I can't say it."
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"What am I doing? What am I..."
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"I'm experimenting, man."
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"I'm growing as an artist, okay?"
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"That's not the Cheech and Chong brand."
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"Brand? Brand?"
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"I'm a 72-year-old man."
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"I've eaten eggs every which way they cook 'em."
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"I can't play it safe anymore."
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"Look, these people pay good money to see "Dave's not here.""
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"You owe them "Dave's not here.""
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"Well, how about this?"
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"Chong's not here, man."
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"Oh, no."
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"Chong is refusing to fall back"
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"on his old catchphrases."
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"Ay, caramba."
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"Maybe you could help him."
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"I can't do reefer comedy. I'm drunk."
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"Two different animals."
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"Homer Simpson, that man's albums"
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"have given you decades of entertainment"
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"Dave's not here, man."
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"No, man, I'm Dave."
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"D-A-V-E."
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"Dave?"
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"That's right. Now open up the door."
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"Dave's not here, man."
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"You find this funny, sir?"
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