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Clips from 30 Rock - Alexis Goodlooking and the Case of the Missing Whisky (S06E06)

"Oh!"
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"Do you like ox, Liz? I'll defrost an ox for you."
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"And I can't be your girlfriend,"
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"'cause I'm not an old pedophile."
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"You were his teacher, and you seduced him."
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"'cause she loves me, and she found a letter."
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"Look what I found in your pornography collection..."
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"So you told her "L" was me?"
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"Or I die."
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"In prison, I was part of a fake family with a bald woman,"
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"- That's quite a suit, Kenneth. - Thank you, sir."
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"That's weird."
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"finding you a new position here has been"
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"That's why I'm putting you in the standards department."
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"if you wanna make it in the business world,"
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"There's always a right and wrong."
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"a janitor or a security guard or some black..."
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"Wow, J-Mo, you sound like a cop,"
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"and I should know."
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"My Uncle was a cop... In a porno."
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"Mine was called Goodlooking."
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"who was also good-looking,"
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"Have the techs lift a latent print,"
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"and run it against AFIS."
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"Maybe the perp's in the system."
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"You sure about that?"
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"I have a lot of experience with playing a wise black fellow"
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"I'm just an old fool, of course,"
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"and we can no longer use the words"
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"When I took over microwaves, I said to the team,"
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""by the end of this quarter,"
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"Not, "we're all gonna be in the black guys.""
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"Balloon!"
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"Kenneth, you are now officially"
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"In business, you have no friends."
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"There was once a man named... Henry Warren."
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"And I'm gonna make sure you get all the credit."
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""Susan.""
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"Like "lazy Susan,""
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"Bradley is dangerous. Last year he was an intern."
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"How did he get promoted so quickly?"
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"Ooh, sir. That's awfully paranoid."
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"like I crushed Henry Warren."
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"except accused witches."
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"Get in there!"
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"is food, wine, and cheek pinching!"
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"- and here we are. - No. Absolutely n..."
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"Yeah, I saw him earlier today."
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"If you think of anything,"
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"Hang on. This chair's been moved."
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"No, wait, I can't. He's dead."
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"Hang on."
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"Hiding something, Mr. Lutz?"
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"What's wrong, Susan?"
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"posing for "Prayboy.""
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"If there are more actors of Asian descent..."
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"No one wants to hear from you."
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"Susan, as a friend,"
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"Your meatballs are good!"
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"Are you sure you're not Italian, Liz?"
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"Maybe from the North?"
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"so we can see the world from each other's perspectives?"
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"With this."
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"He's four credits shy of a degree in bro studies."
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"and he's fired."
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"No! I can't do that."
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"It's wrong!"
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"and tell the story about my cousin seeing Phil Donahue."
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"It would hurt him too much."
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"We're goin' rogue."
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"Hey."
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"You were right, Liz."
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"First of all, why were you in my bedroom,"
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"It's the only part where we weren't having break-up sex."
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"It's my mom's recipe."
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"- So you're sure you're okay? - Yeah."
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"Henry Warren-Chang."
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"I married a very bossy Chinese lady."
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"named Kenneth Parcell came to my office this afternoon."
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"- And what did you tell him? - I told him the truth."
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"But at what cost, Jack?"
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"and then... Exploit them."
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"But what about all the dinners?"
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"You know what?"
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"and turn him into another paranoid corporate killer."
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"You're gonna hang out with Pete every night this week."
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"Why would we do that?"
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"we tell Pete about your little scam..."
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"How the show's been paying for your video games"
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"No, it's these meatballs. They don't taste right."
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"Forget it, Tracy."
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"Now, give me that transcript."
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"Maybe you're afraid I will become you."
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"- Well, you know politics. - I don't know anything."
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"I get all my news from the radio in Grand Theft Auto."
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"Sylvia, your son is not sick."
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"Ma'am, I am in a Mexican prison gang."
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"and you don't want that kind of heat."
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"I was getting this tattoo."
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"I mean, how they met is disgusting."
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"Their age difference is just weird."
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"That's right. Your meatballs."
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"Do you have any idea"
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"but I'd probably be more attracted to 12."
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"I mean, that's an okay joke, but it hurt."
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"Oh, my big family."
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"♪ And Phil Donahue's walking past cinnabon ♪"
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"♪ and he's making eye contact with me ♪"
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"I put hats on and get high with."
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"My wife had two of the president's babies,"
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"My Frankie could have any woman on earth,"
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"- and he chose you? - Ma!"
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"What are you doing here?"
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"Why can't you just be happy that I'm happy..."
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"- With Liz? - Can I just say one sentence?"
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"Dio mio,i'm an old fool. What is wrong with me?"
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"My boy's in love!"
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"Come over for dinner. Tonight."
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"Mwah! Mush! Eh!"
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"Oh... oh!"
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