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Clips from The Office - Gay Witch Hunt (S03E03)

"RYAN: Yeah, I'm not a temp anymore."
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"which means at my 10-year high school reunion,"
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""at a mid-range paper supply firm.""
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"Me, too."
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"Okay. I think Oscar would just like it if you used lame or something like that."
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"Yeah."
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"For liking the movie Shakespeare in Love more than an action movie."
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"Yeah, I know. No. He's attracted to other men."
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"Okay. Little too far. Crossed the line."
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"And obviously he hopes he can count on your discretion."
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"Oh, it's fine. It's okay. It's okay. No. No."
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"I have been calling people faggy since I was in junior high,"
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"No. I'm not gay."
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"I think that's pretty obvious."
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"And you can't beat that view, right?"
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"Hey, Big Tuna, you're single, right?"
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"Okay. Okay."
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"There could be others."
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"I need to know. I don't want to offend anybody else."
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"Oh, you know what? I can check for you."
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"I miss that."
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"Chicken."
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"PAM: Yeah, I didn't go through with the wedding."
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"and I can't really explain it."
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"I have my own apartment and I'm taking art classes."
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"I tried to return the toaster to the store and they said"
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"at a failing paper supply company in Scranton."
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"Okay,"
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"who put my calculator in JELL-O?"
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"(BLEEPING) I watch Queer as... so..."
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"Coming out is a significant moment for a gay person."
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"It's not, like, gay shame festival."
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"No. No. It's not possible. I don't..."
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"Anything's possible. Okay, you know, imagine you were gay."
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"The company has made it my responsibility today"
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"Trick question."
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"Was that the right answer?"
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"He has his own reasons."
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"Don't touch me!"
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"When I was growing up, it meant lame."
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"And now it means a man"
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"I mean, anybody can be gay."
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"Oscar, why don't you take this opportunity to officially come out"
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"Go ahead. Stand up."
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"so, whatever."
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"Can I sit down now?"
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"No way! RYAN: Congratulations, Phyllis."
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"Well, with your ties and your matching socks..."
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"I don't think I can work here any longer."
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"Okay."
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"You don't..."
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"I want you to watch this"
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"Because this is an image"
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"We don't need to."
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"I'm still here."
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"We have to be mature,"
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"What is love anyway?"
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"what should stand in their way?"
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"That's part of my job as regional manager."
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"Oh, there's Gil, Oscar's roommate."
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"I wonder if he knows."
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"I was going to quit,"
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"Gil and I are going to Europe."
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"Nice."
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"(BEEPING)"
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"It works."
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"I got Jim's old job,"
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"it will not say, "Ryan Howard is a temp.""
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"You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that."
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"I think we're just drunk."
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"No, I'm not drunk."
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"Are you drunk? No."
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"Jim."
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"You're really going to marry him?"
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"Okay."
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"Jim is gone."
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"He's gone. I miss him so much."
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"False. I do not miss him."
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"No. That is the fun of this place."
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"I call everybody faggy. Why would anyone find that offensive?"
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"No, not really. Oh."
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"It wasn't just an action movie, it was Die Hard."
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"All right, Michael, but Oscar's really gay."
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"Exactly. I mean for real."
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"Okay. I am telling you,"
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"Oscar is an actual homosexual."
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"I would have never called him that if I knew."
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"You don't call retarded people retards."
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"It's bad taste."
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"You call your friends retards when they're acting retarded."
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"And I consider Oscar a friend."
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"Listen, man, I am so sorry. I had no idea."
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"It's okay. No, it's not. I just... I feel terrible about it."
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"and I have never made this mistake."
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"If I don't know how to behave,"
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"it is because I am just so far the opposite way."
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"I... I can't even imagine the thing..."
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"Maybe we could go out for a beer sometime and you could tell me"
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"how you do that to another dude."
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"It explains so much."
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"And I don't understand why anyone would think that I'm gay if..."
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"Yeah, I'm gay."
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"I can't say whether Dunder Mifflin paper is less flammable, sir,"
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"but I can assure you that it is certainly not more flammable."
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"I got promoted."
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"Yeah, I am."
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"Pretty hot, huh?"
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"She's completely crazy."
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"Steer clear, Big Tuna."
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"Head for open waters."
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"JIM: I ate a tuna sandwich on my first day, so Andy started calling me Big Tuna."
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"I don't think any of them actually know my real name."
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"Big Tuna is a super ambitious guy,"
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"you know, cut your throat to get ahead type of guy."
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"But, I mean, I'm not threatened by him."
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"I went to Cornell. You ever heard of it?"
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"I was drunk the whole time"
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"and I sang in the a cappella group Here Comes Treble."
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"So, end of day we are going to have a little diversity policy freshener"
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"And I have a list of business start-ups I got from the chamber."
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