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Clips from Problem Child (1990)

"Nice night to be born, huh?"
Problem Child (1990)
"Apparently my birth was not considered a blessed event."
Problem Child (1990)
"That's me in the basket and that's my mother carrying me."
Problem Child (1990)
"And that's my mother...running away."
Problem Child (1990)
"Well, this can still work out. Look at this placel"
Problem Child (1990)
"Oh!"
Problem Child (1990)
"Madam!"
Problem Child (1990)
"Aw... aw... aw..."
Problem Child (1990)
"Who on earth would want to abandon such a wonderful little baby boy?"
Problem Child (1990)
"On the day I was born"
Problem Child (1990)
"The nurses all gathered round"
Problem Child (1990)
"They gazed in wild wonder At the joy they had found..."
Problem Child (1990)
"But I am not dreaming."
Problem Child (1990)
"One thing I know, and that is that there's no such thing in the world as a bad boy."
Problem Child (1990)
"What does he know?"
Problem Child (1990)
"Bad to the bone Bad to the bone"
Problem Child (1990)
"B- b-b-b bad B- b-b-b bad"
Problem Child (1990)
"B- b-b-b bad..."
Problem Child (1990)
"What a strange-looking dogl"
Problem Child (1990)
"I'll bet he's hungry."
Problem Child (1990)
"This looks good."
Problem Child (1990)
"B- b-b-b bad B- b-b-b bad..."
Problem Child (1990)
"Diver Dan, Diver Danl Surface, surfacel"
Problem Child (1990)
"I wanna be yours, pretty baby Yours and yours alone"
Problem Child (1990)
"I'm here to tell ya, honey I'm bad to the bone..."
Problem Child (1990)
"These are my favourite toys. Who am I kidding? They're my only toys."
Problem Child (1990)
"That's my dad."
Problem Child (1990)
"So you want to play rough, huh?"
Problem Child (1990)
"I was just kiddingl Oh, nol Not the nuns, not the nunsl"
Problem Child (1990)
"Bad to the bone B- b-b-b bad"
Problem Child (1990)
"Bad to the bone"
Problem Child (1990)
"Geel I wonder if penguins can flyl"
Problem Child (1990)
"Help!"
Problem Child (1990)
"Help!"
Problem Child (1990)
"You see? No one really ever accepted me."
Problem Child (1990)
"Who'd be that caring?"
Problem Child (1990)
"Who'd be that loving? Who'd be that dumb?"
Problem Child (1990)
"Listen to this. It says here that Henry is a strong name."
Problem Child (1990)
"He's loyal and loving."
Problem Child (1990)
"Henry? Hank. Henri. Sounds like a loser."
Problem Child (1990)
"No, come on, think about it. Henry, Hank. Hank Aaron, that's a winner."
Problem Child (1990)
""How was school today, Hank?" "Great, Dad!""
Problem Child (1990)
"- Let's put a star down next to Henry. - No, I don't like it."
Problem Child (1990)
"What about Donald? It says Donald is wealthy and powerful."
Problem Child (1990)
"That's the kind of kid I want."
Problem Child (1990)
"I'll be happy no matter how he turns out."
Problem Child (1990)
"- He'll be our child. - It won't hurt if he's chairman of the board."
Problem Child (1990)
"So, when is your child due?"
Problem Child (1990)
"I'm not really pregnant yet. We're just planning ahead."
Problem Child (1990)
"A little wishful thinking never hurt anyone."
Problem Child (1990)
"Here at the clinic we pride ourselves on a 99%% success rate."
Problem Child (1990)
"- Little Henry Healy. - Donald."
Problem Child (1990)
"Unfortunately, there is that other 1%%."
Problem Child (1990)
"And you're it. I'm sorry, but the test came back positive."
Problem Child (1990)
"- Positive, that's good. - No, positive is bad."
Problem Child (1990)
"No, positive is good, negative is bad."
Problem Child (1990)
"No, negative is good. You see, you are positively infertile."
Problem Child (1990)
"You mean we've been doing it every night for nothing?"
Problem Child (1990)
"Let me explain."
Problem Child (1990)
"This is your uterus."
Problem Child (1990)
"That purple thing is your cervix."
Problem Child (1990)
"These green things are your fallopian tubes and this..."
Problem Child (1990)
"That's not supposed to happen. Toss me that."
Problem Child (1990)
"This yellow thing is your ovary. Fits right in there like that."
Problem Child (1990)
"Well, you know what? It doesn't matter."
Problem Child (1990)
"You don't even have a yellow thing and your green thing is brown."
Problem Child (1990)
"- Doctor, are you sure there's no hope? - None whatsoever."
Problem Child (1990)
"But there are alternatives to having your own child."
Problem Child (1990)
"I tried to like it at the orphanage"
Problem Child (1990)
"but then I became interested in photography."
Problem Child (1990)
"After that, things kind of went downhill."
Problem Child (1990)
"Eat all of your stew, children."
Problem Child (1990)
"A growing body needs nutrition. And discipline."
Problem Child (1990)
"If it's so nutritious, how come I don't see you eating it?"
Problem Child (1990)
"- Aw, Junior! - Junior!"
Problem Child (1990)
"I was never really sure which one I got, nutrition or discipline."
Problem Child (1990)
"- What do they put in this stuff? - Junior, please don't get us in trouble again."
Problem Child (1990)
"Who are they kidding?"
Problem Child (1990)
"Junior!"
Problem Child (1990)
"What happened to your lunch?"
Problem Child (1990)
"It was so delicious I just gobbled it all up!"
Problem Child (1990)
"I can't believe it. For once, you behaved yourself. Thank you, Lord!"
Problem Child (1990)
"Hey, lady, hands off the merchandise! I gotta hear out of that thing!"
Problem Child (1990)
"Ow...!"
Problem Child (1990)
"All right, mister, you know the routine. Start mopping."
Problem Child (1990)
"Sister, I'm all packed to go."
Problem Child (1990)
"There's my favourite little boy. I'm going to miss you so much."
Problem Child (1990)
"Miss him? Where's he going?"
Problem Child (1990)
"Haven't you heard? I'm getting adopted. I got a new mommy and daddy and they're so nice."
Problem Child (1990)
"- Really? - Yes."
Problem Child (1990)
"Good little boys get good homes."
Problem Child (1990)
"Bad little boys get something else."
Problem Child (1990)
"Big deal. If you have to be a creep like Freddy, I don't want a family."
Problem Child (1990)
"...a man described as evil incarnate, a man called "the fiend of the century"."
Problem Child (1990)
"Where are my cartoons?"
Problem Child (1990)
"They did me wrongl They had it comingl"
Problem Child (1990)
"- All 34? - You bet they didl"
Problem Child (1990)
"This guy's pretty popular. He's on every channel."
Problem Child (1990)
"Since he escaped, residents of the bordering states have been afraid to leave their home."
Problem Child (1990)
"Beck, known infamously as the Bow Tie Killer, was recaptured this afternoon"
Problem Child (1990)
"and is now on his way back to federal prison."
Problem Child (1990)
"I'm not a bad guyl I'm just misunderstoodl"
Problem Child (1990)
"Nobody cares about me but mel"
Problem Child (1990)
"What a good-looking guy."
Problem Child (1990)
"Because of this attempted prison break, Beck would have to serve additional time."
Problem Child (1990)
"When he is returned to the federal prison, Beck will be placed under..."
Problem Child (1990)
"Do you see him?"
Problem Child (1990)
"There's our boy!"
Problem Child (1990)
"Oh, honey!"
Problem Child (1990)
"You guys, I'm so excited!"
Problem Child (1990)
"Have a good day, honey."
Problem Child (1990)
"Why don't you take a look at this adoption literature? We can talk about it tonight."
Problem Child (1990)
"Why don't you? I don't wear second-hand clothes and I won't have a second-hand kid."
Problem Child (1990)
"- Adoption is out! - OK, all right."
Problem Child (1990)
"Fine."
Problem Child (1990)
"Welcome to Big Ben's, the sporting goods store that has everything."
Problem Child (1990)
"Sporting goods made by Americans for Americans."
Problem Child (1990)
"My fellow Americans, don't forget to vote for Big Ben for Mayorl"
Problem Child (1990)
"- Mister, do you work here? - I sure do. How can I help you?"
Problem Child (1990)
"I'm looking for a canteen with a compass on it."
Problem Child (1990)
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