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Clips from Crackerjack

"But if you can't handle the heat, get out of the kitchen."
Crackerjack
"You want a radox bath?"
Crackerjack
"You look like you're aching all over."
Crackerjack
"Don't joke, Dave. It gets pretty hairy out there."
Crackerjack
"To tell the truth, I have pulled up a bit sore."
Crackerjack
"You wouldn't be able to pass me one of those beers,"
Crackerjack
"would you, Dave?"
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"Thank you."
Crackerjack
"So, rolling balls with a bunch of oldies."
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"Hard yards."
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"They're not balls, Dave, they're bowls."
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"Tell you the truth, it wasn't all bad."
Crackerjack
"Yeah, right. Very civilised, actually."
Crackerjack
"Smoke like a chimney,"
Crackerjack
"booze is cheap, food's free,"
Crackerjack
"and, at the end of the day, not much chance of doing a hammy."
Crackerjack
"That's a tick in every box."
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"Some of the old holdens in the car park"
Crackerjack
"are in better Nick than yours."
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"Bullshit. Swear jar, Dave."
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"What? Swear jar."
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"What part of 'no' don't you understand, Bernie?"
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"I don't believe you people."
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"I'm throwing this club a lifeline."
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"We've decided to go a different route."
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"There isn't a different route."
Crackerjack
"Len: The no pokies route."
Crackerjack
"Look, let's just put aside, can we,"
Crackerjack
"the question of poker machines for a moment?"
Crackerjack
"Forget pokies."
Crackerjack
"No, no. Great idea, len."
Crackerjack
"Let's forget about these machines"
Crackerjack
"that bring in $50,000 each annually."
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"Every year, len."
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"I'm not Einstein, but you do the figures."
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"You multiply that by 100 - that's the number of machines."
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"We're sitting on a goldmine."
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"We're gonna bus these people in and pick their pockets"
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"24 hours a day, 7 days a week."
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"The machines are programmed so the people can't win."
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"They literally cannot win."
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"It's like shooting fish in a barrel."
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"Sorry, Bernie."
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"Well, you're gonna have to do something, aren't you?"
Crackerjack
"I mean, the clock is ticking for the club, isn't it?"
Crackerjack
"You'll come round - you've got to."
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"There is no other option."
Crackerjack
"Woman on radio: It's alright for youse"
Crackerjack
"living in the leafy suburbs of Sydney and Melbourne."
Crackerjack
"What about the real Australians?"
Crackerjack
"Radio announcer: Well said. Next caller."
Crackerjack
"Man: This transport strike's a bloody disgrace."
Crackerjack
"I was late for work all this week."
Crackerjack
"At least you're going to work, unlike those union bludgers..."
Crackerjack
"Is there anything else I can help you with?"
Crackerjack
"Thanks for the call,"
Crackerjack
"and don't forget our online billing service."
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"Hello."
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"Len? You didn't have to call, but I appreciate it."
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"Now, listen, if I can ever help out again..."
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"That's the reason for calling, Jack."
Crackerjack
"Len, thanks for the call. Gotta go. You're a good egg."
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"The reason I'm calling is to let you know"
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"I've done the roster and you'll be required to work the bar"
Crackerjack
"next Tuesday evening after ladies pennant."
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"We've called an extraordinary general meeting."
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"Jack, are we still on for Tuesday night?"
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"Babe, have I ever let you down?"
Crackerjack
"Len, listen... Zurich on the other line."
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"I've gotta go, really. Jack"
Crackerjack
"the thing you need to know about this club"
Crackerjack
"is it's all hands on deck."
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"Do I get paid? No."
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"The only person who gets paid here is the greenkeeper."
Crackerjack
"Tuesday then?"
Crackerjack
"Great. Only one more sleep."
Crackerjack
"Thanks."
Crackerjack
"Oh, and, er, Jack... yes?"
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"You're a good egg."
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"Rules are rules, ida. I'm going to have my say."
Crackerjack
"Oh, this is the cheese incident?"
Crackerjack
"I've heard about it. He should know better."
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"Ida: Nobody else can get away with it. Why should he?"
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"Jack: Whey-hey, nice pins! Fuck off."
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"I wasn't talking to you."
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"Nance... l know."
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"Swear jar."
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"How was the bowling, ladies? Fine, thank you."
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"That's the way. We met the other day."
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"I'm Eileen - the lady president."
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"President? Slept your way to the top, I'll bet."
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"Ladies, this is Jack Simpson."
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"We've been talking about you. All good, I hope."
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"Well... no, actually."
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"Jack, it's been brought to my attention"
Crackerjack
"that last Saturday after bowls you helped yourself"
Crackerjack
"to a slice from the complimentary wheel of cheese."
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"Is that right? Yes."
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"And you used it to make a sandwich,"
Crackerjack
"even though it's clearly understood by all members"
Crackerjack
"that the cheese is provided"
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"for the making of cheese and biscuits only."
Crackerjack
"Should my lawyer be present? Knock it off, Jack."
Crackerjack
"What if I plead insanity? I beg your pardon?"
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"Putting a slice of cheese between two bits of bread"
Crackerjack
"as opposed to on top of a cracker -"
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"I ask you, does that sound like the actions of a sane man?"
Crackerjack
"Drinks, ladies? Three Shirley temples, please."
Crackerjack
"Oh, no. I'm not falling for that one."
Crackerjack
"I've seen you old ducks in the supermarket. Back in five."
Crackerjack
"How the hell do you make a Shirley temple?"
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"Buggered if I know."
Crackerjack
"She's community affairs reporter for the 'bugle'."
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"Covers bowls, along with half a dozen other things."
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"Gee, bet she's pinching herself."
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"She used to do the 'tribune'."
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"Did quite well too. Till she upset the wrong person."
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"Her name's Nance."
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"If you're interested. Am not."
Crackerjack
"Got a girlfriend. No, you don't!"
Crackerjack
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