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Clips from Never Have I Ever - ...had a breakdown (S03E03)

"Welcome back to the amped-up brain"
Never Have I Ever
"of Sherman Oaks' favorite little try-hard, Ben Gross."
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"I am Andy Samberg, and I'll once again be your guide"
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"to this kid's complicated interior life."
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"Feel free to check your coats at the door, folks, because our boy has no chill."
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"Let's go."
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"Indeed, Ben, let us go."
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"All right, crunch time."
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"You got this."
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"Ever since he was little,"
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"Ben had wanted to go to Columbia, just like his father had."
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"But he knew that the only way to make sure he'd get in"
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"was to become an academic machine."
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"Time for breakfast, my little prince."
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"No time, Patty. I gotta get to school."
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"You cannot think if you do not eat."
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"You need to fuel that big, handsome brain of yours."
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"It's okay. I'll just eat a jerky stick on the way."
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"While your parents are in Arizona,"
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"I am in charge, and you are working too hard."
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"You must slow down."
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"I can't. There's too much at stake."
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"Plus, people aren't rooting for rich kids anymore."
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"We're in a post Operation Varsity Blues society, Patty."
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"My dad can't just buy my way onto an Ivy League crew team"
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"like in the old days."
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"I'm sure he didn't really mean it like that."
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"He knows bribing your way into college is wrong. I hope."
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"Hey, watch where you're going, dumbass."
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"What'd you just call me?"
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"Nothin'. I… I was just talking to myself."
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"Time to go to class, dumbass."
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"-Okay."
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"-What's up? -You look hungry."
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"-Do I? -Yes. Get him. Get him."
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"-Come on. -That doesn't even seem fun."
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"Who needs developmentally crucial male bonding"
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"when you've got an A-plus diorama of the Irish Potato Famine."
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"Wow, that sentence made me sad."
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"Too easy."
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"We say, "Let's play""
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"I wanted to help you out,"
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"but not as much as I wanted to see those books fall."
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"Ben Gross."
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"There you are."
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"We need to talk."
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"I just found out that you're taking ten classes."
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"That's crazy."
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"You need to drop two classes immediately."
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"What? No."
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"This is the second semester of junior year."
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"I can't slow down now. I mean, it's almost D-Day, baby."
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"Do not call me "baby.""
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"Sorry. It just sort of rolled out of my mouth."
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"Look, Ben, your schedule is untenable. You don't have a lunch period anymore."
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"I don't need a lunch period. I have a system."
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"Mm-hmm, yes, I've seen you with your meat sticks."
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"Look, you have until tomorrow to drop two classes or I will drop them."
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"You can't do this."
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"I already did, baby."
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"Mr. Hall-Yoshida!"
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"I'm still waiting on that college essay."
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"Yep, I'm on it. I'm basically done."
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"Oh, so you'll be sending it over tonight?"
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"Totally."
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"You told me that yesterday, and I got nothing."
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"Probably went to spam."
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"Don't lie to my face, little boy."
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"Get me that essay."
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"-You got it. -Mm-hmm."
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"And why are you still standing here? Don't you have a class to get to?"
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"All right, another fun group project this week."
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"You're gonna create presentations based on the next few units in your syllabus"
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"and then teach those units to the class."
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"Wait. Are you asking us to make lesson plans and then teach them?"
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"Isn't that your job?"
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"That's a lot of nit-picking from you, Devi."
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"Who do you think you are, my wife? Sorry. Ex-wife."
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"If it wasn't clear already,"
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"Mr. Brighton was going through an acrimonious divorce,"
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"and he wasn't handling it well."
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"Um, get into groups of three."
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"Shouldn't be that hard to choose."
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"It's like how my two sons chose their mother."
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"So, you wanna team up?"
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"You're the only person in class who hates group projects as much as I do."
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"Yeah. My last group partner transferred classes"
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"because he claimed my emails were "violently smug.""
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"Oh, look who it is."
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"Two of my closest friends in school, Crazy Devi and, uh, this dude."
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"Trent, are you trying to be in our group just so you can get an A?"
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"How dare you suggest that?"
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"I was coming over to say hey and to inquire about your well-being."
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"You can be in our group if you use your fake ID to buy us beer whenever we want."
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"Deal."
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"All right."
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"Uh, I have some free time between- 15 and- 00 a.m. tonight to work on this."
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"-That good for you guys? -Are you out of your mind?"
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"We're not operating on your psycho schedule."
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"Both of you guys just come to my house after school."
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"No, I can't. That's when I Zoom with my Mandarin teacher."
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"Okay. Trent will do your section, and I'll just put your name on it."
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"No."
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"I'll be there."
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"-Hmm."
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"I've never gotten so close to having to do work."
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"Okay, looks like Ben's overbooked afternoon"
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"was now even more overbooked."
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"But if anyone could do it,"
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"-Ben could."
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"Yeesh! You okay, little dude?"
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"Okay. We have to cover chapter six, Circular Motion and Gravitation."
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"With all dude respect,"
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"I can't do that chapter because of religious reasons."
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"My belief system does not include a "round" Earth."
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"Trent, how are you in AP physics?"
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"I just signed up."
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"I figured if I'm gonna get a D anyway,"
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"why not get a D in an AP class because it basically counts as a C."
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"That's actually not that bad of a plan."
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