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Clips from Silicon Valley - Articles of Incorporation (S01E01)

"Ok, let me get this straight, you would rather do nothing than something?"
Silicon Valley
"Because all the guys in the other room"
Silicon Valley
"coming up with shitty names like, Smallulator, are at least doing something."
Silicon Valley
"[Sighs]"
Silicon Valley
"Fine. I'll just do it myself."
Silicon Valley
"I'll be back in 24 to 72 hours."
Silicon Valley
"Have a cold pitcher of water and some orange slices ready for me."
Silicon Valley
"You know what, I'm really gonna go for this motherfucker"
Silicon Valley
"so you better have some grapefruit ready, too."
Silicon Valley
"I'm gonna come back with a name so amazing that Peter Gregory will write us ten checks."
Silicon Valley
"What about, Dwarfism 2.0?"
Silicon Valley
"Where's Dwarfism 1.0?"
Silicon Valley
"Just in the world."
Silicon Valley
"- Oh. - That's prejudice."
Silicon Valley
"- That's hurtful. - I'm sorry."
Silicon Valley
"Small, come back now, are you here?"
Silicon Valley
"[Jared] Interesting."
Silicon Valley
"Hey! That is not cherry garcia."
Silicon Valley
"Sorry, Gilfoyle. Company business."
Silicon Valley
"And who's hiding drugs? Shocker, it's the illegal immigrant."
Silicon Valley
"[Dinesh] What about mine-imize, like minimize but mine."
Silicon Valley
"[Jared] Yeah. [Chuckles]"
Silicon Valley
"Hello, Mr. Garris."
Silicon Valley
"Yes, this is Richard from the company"
Silicon Valley
"that is rightly called Pied Piper."
Silicon Valley
"That's right."
Silicon Valley
"No, no, no. You listen to me. Ok. We had a handshake deal."
Silicon Valley
"And that may not mean a lot to you, but where I come from, that means a whole lot."
Silicon Valley
"Ok, you agreed to sell me that name for a thousand dollars."
Silicon Valley
"So let me ask you this? Are you an honest man or are you a goddamn liar?"
Silicon Valley
"Ok. Yes, same address?"
Silicon Valley
"Good, yeah, great. See you then."
Silicon Valley
"Dude, that was fucking badass. What did he say?"
Silicon Valley
"He said he was gonna get in his truck,"
Silicon Valley
"drive down here and beat the living shit out of me."
Silicon Valley
"Why did you say that was your address?"
Silicon Valley
"- Say any other address. - I don't know."
Silicon Valley
"He's got a very powerful voice."
Silicon Valley
"What are we gonna do?"
Silicon Valley
"If you keep screaming your name,"
Silicon Valley
"it forces the assailant to acknowledge you as a human."
Silicon Valley
"[Cell phone beeps]"
Silicon Valley
"It is now 5:35pm and I have ingested the psilocybin."
Silicon Valley
"I have started the countdown timer"
Silicon Valley
"and I will be reaching Sonora and nirvana in approximately..."
Silicon Valley
"- Oh, fuck. - [Car horn honks]"
Silicon Valley
"Oh, shit."
Silicon Valley
"[Knocking on door]"
Silicon Valley
"[Richard whispering] He's here, that's him."
Silicon Valley
"He came."
Silicon Valley
"- Should I call 911? - No, that's a pussy move."
Silicon Valley
"- Yeah, it's a pussy move. - Shhh."
Silicon Valley
"- Just shush. - [Knocking continues]"
Silicon Valley
"Just stay here until he goes away, please."
Silicon Valley
"I'm looking for Pied Piper."
Silicon Valley
"You know where it is?"
Silicon Valley
"This is Pied Piper."
Silicon Valley
"No, no, no. It's a company."
Silicon Valley
"Like a big, big office."
Silicon Valley
"Do you know where that is?"
Silicon Valley
"Yeah, this it. Here. Pied Piper."
Silicon Valley
"No..."
Silicon Valley
"Uh..."
Silicon Valley
"Hi, Arnold."
Silicon Valley
"I'm Richard. I'm Richard. I'm Richard."
Silicon Valley
"- Donald. I'm Donald. - Richard. Richard..."
Silicon Valley
"- Jared. I'm Jared. - Richard, Richard, Richard."
Silicon Valley
"- Gilfoyle. Gilfoyle. - My name is Richard."
Silicon Valley
"- Jared, Jared. - Richard, Richard."
Silicon Valley
"- [Dinesh] Gilfoyle, Gilfoyle. - Jing Yang. Jing Yang. Jing Yang."
Silicon Valley
"Sysbit Digital Solutions."
Silicon Valley
"Integrating open data spaces."
Silicon Valley
"Yeah."
Silicon Valley
"TechBitData Solution Systems."
Silicon Valley
"Creating unique cross platform technologies."
Silicon Valley
"Technologies. Technolo-Jesus."
Silicon Valley
"Oh, fuck!"
Silicon Valley
"[Arnold] So this is Pied Piper?"
Silicon Valley
"This is a billion dollar company?"
Silicon Valley
"Not even close. Not yet."
Silicon Valley
"You pack a lot of guys in here."
Silicon Valley
"It reminds me when I started Pied Piper in my garage."
Silicon Valley
"I kind of miss those days."
Silicon Valley
"Oh, yeah? [Nervous chuckle]"
Silicon Valley
"I'll tell you what."
Silicon Valley
"Five thousand bucks and the name is yours."
Silicon Valley
"Well, the thing is we agreed on a thousand."
Silicon Valley
"Fine, four grand."
Silicon Valley
"[Sighs] Look, that's not the deal."
Silicon Valley
"- We shook on it. - Two thousand. Final offer."
Silicon Valley
"We could do two. That's reasonable."
Silicon Valley
"No, we can't do two, Jared. It's not reasonable at all."
Silicon Valley
"Look, we shook hands on a thousand dollars. That's the deal."
Silicon Valley
"Ok. A grand."
Silicon Valley
"But you gotta throw in some gas money."
Silicon Valley
"- I drove all the way out here. - To come to kick my ass!"
Silicon Valley
"Ok, you know what?"
Silicon Valley
"Five hundred! That's the deal. Five hundred."
Silicon Valley
"- Fuck this. - No, no, no, no."
Silicon Valley
"We don't have to... We can keep it at the original thousand dollars."
Silicon Valley
"So, let's..."
Silicon Valley
"- Ok, you got a deal. - All right. Cool."
Silicon Valley
"We got a name!"
Silicon Valley
"Infotrode..."
Silicon Valley
"Cloud-based, disruptive platforms."
Silicon Valley
"Disrupting the cloud through..."
Silicon Valley
"I said cloud twice, shit."
Silicon Valley
"Making the world a better place"
Silicon Valley
"through cross-platform business facing cloud..."
Silicon Valley
"There's that... shit! There's that cloud again!"
Silicon Valley
"Info-trode, Info-trode!? What the fuck is Info-trode?"
Silicon Valley
"What is that? It's all just fucking meaningless words!"
Silicon Valley
"Ok. No, no, no..."
Silicon Valley
"Making the world a better place. Making the world a better place."
Silicon Valley
"Making the world a better place. Making the world a better place."
Silicon Valley
"Making the world a better place. Making the world a better place."
Silicon Valley
"[Man's voice echoing] Good-bye."
Silicon Valley
"Making the world a better place. Making the world a better place."
Silicon Valley
"Making the world a better place. Making the world a better place."
Silicon Valley
"- Making the world a better place. - Sir?"
Silicon Valley
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